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Dating someone in the same field


florange

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After some back and forth messaging on a dating site, this guy and I set up a date. He's attractive, educated, and funny. BUT he works in my field, which, even in a big city, is small and very interconnected. I always told myself that I wouldn't date someone in the profession, yet I agreed to the date anyway. Now I'm having second thoughts, because it feels incestuous. I am trying to imagine getting drinks with him, and instead, I'm seeing him as a colleague.

 

I know that lots of people date within their profession. How do you pull it off? How do you treat it as a date, rather than a networking event? Not talk about work, I know, but that's easier said than done.

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Are you sure that this is the real problem? Could it be that you are afraid to get hurt/afraid to get close to someone/have abandonement issues/something else is bothering you in him and you are subconciously looking for excuses not to get close to him? I am saying this because I think that most people wouldn't see this as a deal breaker (unless you are working in the same department/organisation and would be seeing each other everyday - are you?) if they really liked the person.

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After some back and forth messaging on a dating site, this guy and I set up a date. He's attractive, educated, and funny. BUT he works in my field, which, even in a big city, is small and very interconnected. I always told myself that I wouldn't date someone in the profession, yet I agreed to the date anyway. Now I'm having second thoughts, because it feels incestuous. I am trying to imagine getting drinks with him, and instead, I'm seeing him as a colleague.

 

I know that lots of people date within their profession. How do you pull it off? How do you treat it as a date, rather than a networking event? Not talk about work, I know, but that's easier said than done.

 

It can be done. Just try it. You will end up talking about work (at least in my experience) but you'll also talk about other things.

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