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This year has been very bad, where is the light in all this?


Xin

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This year has been pretty bad for me, and I am a Christian so I am trying to look for some kind of light in the situation, but it can be difficult because of everything that's happened.

 

I've been doing very badly in school. For the beginning of the year, I was very sick, so I missed a lot of class. I managed to do okay the first quarter but the second quarter I had to withdraw because I was very sick. During the summer, I hoped to at least have some fun, and meet new people, but I pretty much stayed home all day. This quarter I am also doing bad, but it is for emotional reasons and mental stress.

 

This year my best friends got into relationships (where they are still in now) which for some reason makes me feel slightly negative. I already feel negative when I see other couples and I don't know why. I did meet a couple girls this year but I couldn't really get to anything with them, but it was okay because I only dated with them. My friends seem really happy in their relationships, and I guess I am a little envious as well. The funny thing is that in the past I was the one always getting girls, which is still true, but they managed to find a relationship while I only meet girls who want to have fun.

 

I did sort of get into a relationship this year, but it was a very bad situation and I should have avoided it but I was stupid because I wanted to be in a relationship. Basically I was played by this girl, and for the longest time I tried to deny it. In the end, I caught her cheating on me with her ex, so we broke it off. I've never actually witnessed something like this before, so it was a huge shock to me, and for a whole month I was just in a state of shock. The worse thing is that when we broke up, she effectively went crazy. Now her ex and her are trying to press charges on me because they don't like me, and since it's two against one (plus some of their friends that don't like me) I have to go to court for very, very serious charges. I actually tried to go to the police station to try to clear it up on my own, but when I went there they arrested me and I spent two nights in jail. I got out, but there's going to be court dates for a while so I have to go to those.

 

They also issued a no-contact order for me so I cannot contact the girl I was with. However, she has been stalking me and saying things like she misses me and stuff. It is really depressing and since I cannot contact her, I even had to call the police when she showed up at my door. I still have some feelings, too, but I cannot be sure if she is tricking me or not, especially given the situation we were in, it isn't right for me to trust her at all. She's also been telling people lies about me, so that people are falling on her side while I don't have the emotional strength to go out and convince people. She even told the landlord of the apartment I am staying at many lies and now they want me to move out at the end of the month.

 

Finally, it's nearing the end of the year, and I am actually turning 21. However, my birthday has fallen on the week before finals every year of college. This year I tried to invite friends to an event but no one said they are coming. So I guess I will have to spend my birthday alone, too.

 

School, relationships, love, law, police, jail, birthdays, living... I feel like I've had to deal with a ton of stuff this year, and I lost a lot. It's hard to see what the good is, except that I may learn something... I've been praying and I see good and bad and I know God doesn't let things happen without a reason... But at this moment it is hard for me to see what that reason is.

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I can't predict how and when things will start to look up for you. I'm so sorry you're going through all of this. I know this is a drop in the bucket considering everything else going on but what about celebrating your b-day a different week when people are more able to attend?

 

I can tell you I've had some sh***y times/years in my life and things always get better eventually. Take care.

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