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Ex wanted me back then decides to get married


Someonewho

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My ex of a year and a half is getting married to a 23 year old. She is 17 years old and has been dating him for 3 months. As time went on I found out more about this guy and the more was worse. For example he has a long history of dating minors for sex. He also has a history of throwing his dignity away just to get into a girls pants. He dated a girl for a month before she found out he was dating another girl the whole time. He told the girl he dated for a month that he wanted to settle down and be serous when he only knew her for a month. Keep in mind she was 17 at the time too. He dated a girl who is twenty now but was 17 when they started dating and and he was twenty. He constantly lied to her told her he wanted to be serious but cheated on her the whole three years he dated her. He then gave the girl an STD before she dumped him after 3 years of being cheated on. Then he dated two more girls at the same time. One was a minor for part of the time when he was 22/23 and the other one was a very unattractive 26 year old. His supervisor ended up telling the two girls what he was doing before they also dumped him for cheating. Turns out both those girls with distant friends. Sick right? He dated my ex for a few weeks before he got her pregnant. After he got her pregnant she came running back to me scared. I wanted to help her. After that he convinced her to take him back and that he would do everything for her. He told her how he gave up air-force jobs just to stay in town for her when the truth was he didn't qualify for the jobs. She felt guilty so she ran back to him. He also has a history of talking about suicide to keep girls close. He will flip out when anyone suspects the truth and will do a convincing job at telling them that its a lie and that he isn't cheating. Later on he found an article about him on the internet which talked about how dirty he is and how he got a minor pregnant so he asked her to marry him in very short notice which is as soon as she turns 18 so it doesn't look bad on his record. When he asked her to get married she came running back to me telling me how I'm that one guy she will never forget and get over and how if anyone could stop her it was me. A day later she said she didn't want me to stop it even though she knows shes rushing it. Problem is hes going to ruin her life and shes falling for his bull. Yes she is a nutcase but she does not deserve a pedophile and compulsive liar. I am willing to take that one percent chance to stop her from going through with this. Just to keep her from this dirt bag. She still is attracted to me and says she always will be. She says she'll always have that want of us bring together and I will always be that what if. If she says no to him its a 1% chance and as she stated I'm that 1%chance. How can I stop her from making a huge mistake? The guy is a pervert and is no doubt even cheating on her now. They've only dated for 3 months.

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How do you know shes not liking this drama? You said shes a nutcase, they thrive on drama as a distraction, and this back and forth is feeding her. A girl once left me for another guy, then she came running back pregnant telling me she made a mistake and is pregnant, i told her to leave me out of it. Shes with the guy, had another kid, and i havent heard from her crazy butt since.

 

All you can do is talk logic into her - thats it. She can only make that decision herself.

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How do you know shes not liking this drama? You said shes a nutcase, they thrive on drama as a distraction, and this back and forth is feeding her. A girl once left me for another guy, then she came running back pregnant telling me she made a mistake and is pregnant, i told her to leave me out of it. Shes with the guy, had another kid, and i havent heard from her crazy butt since.

 

All you can do is talk logic into her - thats it. She can only make that decision herself.

 

^This. You can't fix crazy. Trust me, it's not worth wrecking your life over a crazy chick with a baby daddy drama. She is who she is and she is not making mistakes, she is making conscious choices that she is willing to live with. Some time down the road you'll look back at this, wonder what you ever saw in her and be thankful you moved on.

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Sure she likes the drama but is it worth letting her ruin her life over some dirt bag who chases minors because hes so self conscious and perverted. I don't want to see her have her life ruined

 

How is it up to you? SHE is doing it too, she knows his bs and is marching along, shes just coming to you to air out her questions - but returns to him without doing anything about it. The girl i last saw was a nutcase, she was 14 with a 29 year old pedophile, her last ex was 38 bipolar fart and she was 23. She randomly left me, those people make no sense- sometimes its better to leave the situation and let yourself return to the normal world.

 

All you can be is her shoulder. Unless you plan to beat the guy up to keep him away (which probably wont work, i wont be surprise he goes down the sympathy route, or bans her from seeing/talking to you), or if you are asking without asking "can i get her back and take her away from this guy?"- then make a move now and see where it goes, if it goes nowhere, then leave her alone- dont be her "friendly safetynet" to hear her problems- there are people far more qualified to do that then you that can actually help her.

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Sure she likes the drama but is it worth letting her ruin her life over some dirt bag who chases minors because hes so self conscious and perverted. I don't want to see her have her life ruined

 

Legally, 17 is underage. In reality, 23-17/18 is not really a big age difference or even maturity difference in some cases. So I think you are blowing things a bit out of proportion as a practical matter. Not saying he is a great guy, only that you are too busy painting him blacker than he is. Dude is not chasing 12 year olds. Besides that, many girls will claim to be of age when they like a guy and want to sleep with him. You don't really know all that is going on behind closed doors - don't kid yourself here.

 

All of those girls know what they are doing and are making conscious choices when they choose to sleep with him or put up with his cheating. The one you are hung up on chose to sleep with him, chose not to use birth control, got knocked up and you know what? Kind of admirable that he is actually accepting responsibility for that and wants to marry her and support her and the kid in whatever way he can. He could just ditch her, drag her through mud, make her prove paternity, go to courts, go hide away somewhere, evade child support, etc. He is not doing any of that. I think you are way too caught up in the drama here. Step away for your own good and start minding your own business.

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You can't stop her. You're her ex. Maybe her sister or mother will try to talk some sense into her, but you really can't. Stand back and move on. She'll be divorced and/or pregnant within 6 months. I know it's hard to see someone make a colossal mistake, but it's her life to live.

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The baby is terminated. He uses the same thing on every qirl. he told her he wants to marry her so it doesnt look bad on his record. He is terrified that he will lose his career. When he found out she was pregnant he just talked about how scared he was and not how she was feeling. doesnt sound like a sweet guy to me. just an act

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The baby is terminated. He uses the same thing on every qirl. he told her he wants to marry her so it doesnt look bad on his record. He is terrified that he will lose his career. When he found out she was pregnant he just talked about how scared he was and not how she was feeling. doesnt sound like a sweet guy to me. just an act

 

So then, your ex doesn't have any problems to be "saved" from. Who she chooses to sleep around with and what she chooses to do is her life and her problem. You need to butt out of her life and mind your own business. Seriously, find better company to hang out with. Move on.

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