Physical symptoms when experiencing a breakup

[lilithia]

Hey guys. Just curious...

 

I see a lot of threads about how to deal with the emotional/psychological pain. But how do you guys cope with physical pain when going through a break up? I've been experiencing stomach pain, gastric troubles, uncontrollable shaking...

 

Don't get me wrong, deep down I know this relationship was never meant to be and that I should not mourn over its end. So I do try to take care of myself and move on. I work out, implement NC, work on self improvement, do relaxation exercises, etc. But I keep feeling these unpleasant symptoms. They bother me so much because they disrupt my normal schedule - can't work, can't concentrate, can't eat properly.

 

Just wanted to know how you guys have been dealing with this.

 

Thanks

 

L.

[mhowe]

Exercise, sleep, nutrious food.

Avoid caffeine and alcohol for the.time being.

[Ironman3]

Well, I think the troubles you are talking about is called anxiety. Stomach pain, gastric trouble and shaking. Sounds like your own stage! I had severe depression when I lost my ex but didn't have much physical problems. I think that's quite rare unless you are suffering from anxiety and stress. I think you should concentrate on yourself for a while. Probably there's this feeling that you are lonely or something. And also inner sense of insecurity etc. Maybe you should hit the gym or take a small break like a tour outside or something. Plus, make sure you avoid off time snacking. Only the regular meals at the correct times a day. Sleep schedule should be correct too. Sleep early, rise early. All the stuff that mom tells you

 

If it still isn't working out, you could consult a doctor for advice. Have some good fruits by the way. Will help a lot with the stomach aches and all. Specially orange and banana. Just make sure you have them in empty stomach so as to prevent bloating of stomach. Bloating is usually caused when you take fruits over some other meal you have already had. Hope this helps someway

[AutumnBorn]

Are you taking supplements? B-vitamins may help, perhaps something in the anti-inflammatory range for the gastro issues.

 

I had trouble sleeping, had panic attacks, and was prescribed sleeping pills (didn't work), anti-anxiety meds (caused me to gain 20 lb.), and, finally, Valium, which worked like a charm to help me sleep those nights when nothing else worked.

 

Good luck...I know how hard it is.

[Grace696]

I went through some intense physical symptoms after my breakup. I felt really nauseous in the mornings for a few months and had no appetite.

 

It sounds like you are doing lots of positive things, so keep it up - relaxation exercises, etc. You might want to check out this thread about techniques for dealing with anxiety:

 

It will get better, and the physical symptoms will pass. You just have to ride it out. And continue to be good to yourself.

[NorthDallas40]

The first step is to go NC, keep to a normal schedule, get enough sleep (but not too much), eat right, exercise, distract yourself with hobbies/project/work, talk to friends & family, try and meet new people, etc.

 

That's the usual advice, and it seems like you're following it. Good for you!

 

But sometimes it's not enough to make you feel normal again.

 

When I was coldheartedly dumped about 5-6 years ago, I ended up losing 20 lbs due to appetite loss caused by anxiety, and my friends were concerned. It sucked.

 

When it happened again last year, luckily I was tempered by the previous experience so it was a bit easier.

 

But between those two breakups, I had also started smoking weed recreationally. And after my 2nd jilting, it helped immensely in dealing with the aftershocks of a breakup that still affects me to this day.

 

Was it an escape? No. I lived my life the same as always.

 

Was I addicted? No. Well perhaps psychologically, but 3 months after the breakup I managed to quit cold turkey for 30 days with no ill-effects.

 

But as an anxiety medicine, a sleep aid, a muscle relaxer, an appetite stimulant, and an all-around mood-lifter... weed was a godsend.

 

I realize that many on this board will disagree 100% with using weed as a crutch post-breakup, and their words will have merit. Some people get paranoid and *more* anxious when smoking weed, and those with addictive personalities should probably stay away from it altogether. It's not for everyone. There's also the legal issues, but in my state it is partially decriminalized so that's not an issue for me.

 

And when I read that someone like AutumnBorn used prescription pills to no avail and finally settled on Valium as the "best" medicine, then in my humble opinion marijuana is an infinitely better alternative.

 

If my advice strikes you as helpful, do some research and see if it's right for you.

[quirky]

The other posters have given good advice, basically create some comforting constistency. Personally I would also say..just cry it out. Sometimes don't do anything and sit there with your pain. Sometimes the anxiety is amplified by trying too hard to feel better. I know how hard it is, but it will pass, hugs.

[SooSad33]

Sounds like anxiety. Go see your dr and explain yourself. See if you can get something to help ease it.

OR goto health food store, ask them for some natural remedies for this.

 

tc

[lilithia]

Thanks for your help.

 

I don't think it's anxiety. I can usually handle a lot of pressure - I can work 70hours a week with heavy deadlines without having panick attacks.

 

I will keep using the "natural methods" of NC, exercise, sleep, and food... and hope it goes away... eventually.

 

I am not excluding the possibility of marijuana (hooray for my province, where marijane is widespread use or medication, but I am afraid of falling into a cycle of addiction. I don't know about valium, but I am not particularly experienced with MJ so I'll avoid unnecessary experiments if I can haha.

 

TC, everyone!

[Imprimatur]

 

I don't think it's anxiety. I can usually handle a lot of pressure - I can work 70hours a week with heavy deadlines without having panick attacks.

 

 

With all due respect, it sounds exactly like anxiety. Just because you work 70 hours, and it doesn't happen to cause you symptoms, does not exclude your B/U from being a trigger. It was (emotionally) a tough life event, and its common for that to have an impact on you and your well being. This forum is a testament to that fact.

 

(FYI, anxiety and depression are very closely related and often co-existing to some degree. Try and bare that in mind

 

You'll make it through!

[catfeeder]

Thanks for your help.

 

I don't think it's anxiety. I can usually handle a lot of pressure - I can work 70hours a week with heavy deadlines without having panick attacks.

 

Anxiety and panic are two different things. While anxiety can cause panic, a lack of panic doesn't rule out anxiety. In fact, lots of us have carried anxiety around without necessarily being aware of it--until the physical symptoms hit.

 

Everyone has their weak spots. With some it's headaches, sometimes as bad as migraines, with others, muscle stiffness, sometimes as bad as sciatica or radiating pain from the neck, with others, the immune system, often starting with problems in the gut. Some people suffer a nice combo plate, and sleep disruption and under or over eating are the cherry on top.

 

Point is, anxiety from a breakup can be 'masked' emotionally, but the body still responds. Your shaking could result from poor appetite, so your glucose levels may be imbalanced. Add sleep disturbance to the mix, and this can run you down.

 

During my highest anxiety times, I set my calendar throughout the day to force myself to take protein--at least a hardboiled egg or slice of chicken. If I can add at least a half cup of soup or a small salad, then I feel even better.

 

At first your stomach may not love this, but anxiety may cause an overproduction of bile, and small amounts of regular food intake is actually better to correct this than allowing the starvation to cause the shakes.

 

Baby yourself, but allow your highest intelligence to take over with regard to feeding yourself. Mild probiotic might be helpful in supplement form rather than yogurt. Avoiding dairy, sugar, caffeine and alcohol might be a good idea.

 

Hydrate heavily.

 

I hope you'll let us know how you're doing, and head high.

[elsenyor]

i had the shingles as a result of my breakup, that was physically annoying, only thing that helped was time, not even the medicine the doctors gave did much.

 

time, working out, eating healthy, sleeping as best as i could. looks like you've gotten a lot of solid advice regarding this, just thought i'd share my physical symptom.