ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Hello everyone I've been with this ex gf for 2 years.. Last October 8th I ask for us to have a break from each other. She agreed and apologize to me if lately she can't be a girlfriend to me due to stress and busy work schedule and she told me Message her if I need her with a sad face on it. Like every relationship we have ups and downs and our relationship at that time is very rocky so I thought asking a break from each other to have time and space can make our relationship stronger for the long run.. but oh boy I was wrong after 1 week of No Contact I stupidly just miss her badly and contacted her and I told her that I love her so much and that I wanted to work things out.. She denied me and wanted to be alone. I didn't expect this from her after 2 years. so we officially broke up October 15 and I started No contact. she contacted me last November 9 asking how I am.. I replied after 6hrs saying I'm good and I didn't ask her back she didn't respond after that we are not in contact till today. I must add that she is being distant and cold to me. Even forgot our anniversary 2 days before I ask for break.. I did ask her first if there is something wrong or if I did something to make her upset. She said nothing. but she told me she is sorry to forgot our anniversary due to long hours at work and told me she loves me and she thanked me for the surprise that I made. I regret so much asking for a break.. I thought it would help us but I was very wrong. I should have done something differently to fix our relationship rather than asking for a break.. She probably got hurt because of it. I don't know what to do.. I really love this woman she is the best I ever had. I wanted to break no contact and ask her to for second chance but I don't really know if that's only gonna ruin me.. I've been with many girls before and I never felt the connection that we had.. I really love this person she is a wife material and I regret asking for a break I feel like my world is just crushed because of wrong decisions. please help? Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 25 she is 28 How old are you? Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 When a break is announced instead of discussion... it breaks the fabric and trust in the relationship. And since it is unclear why/how long break will be, plus the fact most people mean break up...it is generally taken as such. She isn't being cold and distant...she is now acting like an ex. Changing your MIMD after a week made things worse. If it only took a week....why take a break. And what is to say you won't do it again? Nothing. Words will not convince... your action/indecisivness have shouted the opposite. Learn and move on. Link to comment
faraday Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Why did you break up with her instead of talking to her? Usually when couples have problems, it pulls them together, not pushes them apart. Do you know why you did that? Did you feel like part of the problem was her? Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 Yes part of the problem was her.. I felt like she's taking me for granted.. Not saying I love you back being cold and distant.. but guys she just sent a message just now.. while I'm typing this she said "Happy Thanksgiving! How are you? We haven't talk in ages. Update me I think this is just a breadcrumbs just like the last time... Do I reply or just Ignore?? Why did you break up with her instead of talking to her? Usually when couples have problems, it pulls them together, not pushes them apart. Do you know why you did that? Did you feel like part of the problem was her? Link to comment
faraday Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 If it had been just you making a mistake and shutting down, I would have suggested a grand romantic gesture to win her back...but you guys had issues. She's not marriage potential...so let her go. Link to comment
doicare Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 You broke her heart of course she's not going to chase you. Right now she's reaching out. I think it's been long enough, answer her. Two three quick lines and ask her how she's doing. You aren't going to get back together by ignoring her. And enough time has passed for her to be open herself back up to you. See how she replies. No need to spill your guts just take it step by step. Good luck. Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 she contacts me just now saying "Happy Thanksgiving! How are you? We haven't talk in ages. Update me " Do I respond?? this is the second time she reach out I'm not sure if I will respond or not. I feel like she is just being friendly When a break is announced instead of discussion... it breaks the fabric and trust in the relationship. And since it is unclear why/how long break will be, plus the fact most people mean break up...it is generally taken as such. She isn't being cold and distant...she is now acting like an ex. Changing your MIMD after a week made things worse. If it only took a week....why take a break. And what is to say you won't do it again? Nothing. Words will not convince... your action/indecisivness have shouted the opposite. Learn and move on. Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Breadcrumbs and bait. She is with family today and bored so she took out her phone. She could have actually (gasp).dialed your number and spoken to you!!! Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 Actually she is in europe right now and they don't celebrate thanksgiving there. but I think she is just being friendly here. Breadcrumbs and bait. She is with family today and bored so she took out her phone. She could have actually (gasp).dialed your number and spoken to you!!! Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 I agree....she is just being friendly. Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Have you ever met...in person? Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 yes we did many times.. She goes here in USA and I go there.. We are planning to move in together on feb next year till this things happen.. Should I just ignore it? Have you ever met...in person? Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Move where? It is incredibly hard to get work in a foreign country and for foreigners to get work visas here. If 90% of this relationship has been on line...I say move on. Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 I am moving there in europe.. As I work at home I do business using internet. She works there at the moment. Still confuse though If i will respond or not. Move where? It is incredibly hard to get work in a foreign country and for foreigners to get work visas here. If 90% of this relationship has been on line...I say move on. Link to comment
ConfuseAndSad Posted November 28, 2013 Author Share Posted November 28, 2013 My situation is so complicated Link to comment
mhowe Posted November 28, 2013 Share Posted November 28, 2013 Then uncomplicate it and date someone in your proximity! Link to comment
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