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Hi everyone. I've had a relationship with a person who has depression/anxiety which he has ended three weeks ago. Although he was caring and a nice boyfriend, things were not right always but I always justified him knowing his struggles. Anyway he has stopped taking his meds around two months ago and I think this may have contributed to his dumping me. After all I've done for him it hurts as hell to know that I only was a burden and a responsibility for him. Instead of openly communicating this to me (he said relationship is hard but he never said about leaving me) he just left me using a fight over my jealousy to break up with me. Looking back I realise I gave him much more than I received from him, I loved him unconditionally especially last months when he grew distant and would appear loving only when intimate. Anyway, he is not talking to some girl he met online and bonding with her emotionally. She and other friends of him are going travelling next year as well. It really hurts that after all I've done I'm seen only as a burden. My mind can't just understand it. I looked at his blog and while we still were together he posted something about that he could actually go ahead and leave this responsibility. I thought we were so close why just post it on the internet instead of telling me? It will be funny if he gets together with that girl from the USA . then I won't believe him about that he can't be in relationships. I think she likes him so I think they will get together. I look at his blog daily and he posted today smth along this 'saying come over to someone who is miles and miles away'. Clearly he is talking about her. The thing is when I dont look him up I start justifying him and thinking that he is still crazy about me and start having falsr hopes. When I look at his profile I can see that he does not care and he is bonding with her. So this vicious circle. What do I do? How to stop caring for him?,how can I develop equal relationships? Any books I should read. Please help.

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Stop reading his blog, first of all. You are just torturing yourself. Get back in touch with friends and put his lazy and uncaring ways behind you. He can say what he wants about a girl 2000 miles away...an on line relationship takes very little.effort...which appears to be perfect for him.

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