Sex with the BFF

[cruel2bkind]

So, one of my BFFs calls me the other night at 1am and asks me what I'm doing. I told her I was cooking (since I work nights, this is not unusual) She sounds upset and a little tipsy. She proceeds to ask if I could come over because she really needs to talk about some issues that really have her upset. I drop everything Im doing and drive over. She is a single mom, 30yrs of age, never married. Im 52, divorced, and single. We are co-workers, working in the healthcare industry. After a 30 min or so conversation, she asks me if I would like to go grab a drink. I agreed. After a couple of drinks each, it was last call and we paid up and left. I was going to drop her off at her house when she asked me if I really wanted to call it a night. I asked her what she had in mind. She suggested we go to my house since she's never been to my house. She asked me if I could bring her home in the morning early enough to pick up her son, I agreed. Long story short, we end up in my bed. Things start to get hot n heavy when I notice that SOMETHING ain't working. No matter what she did (for over an hour mind you) I just couldn't get it up. I was totally freaking out by now. This had NEVER happened EVER! I was totally embarrassed and assured her this had absolutely nothing to do with her. Unfortunately, I'm diabetic, and my disease has not been well controlled for the past year or so. E.D. is a primary consequence of high blood sugars and high Hemoglobin A1C. After putting 2 and 2 together, I surmised that this was the culprit to my non-performance. I took her home around 7am.On the way home, she made me promise to tell nobody what happened. She was due to work later that night with me, but called off. She said she was sick and really hung over. The following night, we worked together. She totally blew me off and gave me the cold shoulder. She went out of her way to avoid me. She walked past me twice and didn't even say hi. I had to approach her and ask her what was going on that pretty little head of hers. She said she wasn't mad at me, but there was something up and we both knew it. We were very close and were always cutting up together at work and away from work. I've chosen to give her a little space and wait and see what happens. We're both critical care nurses, we both know the ramification's of my disease, we have discussed this topic many times in he past. Is she pissed off at me for my lack of performance? Is she embarrassed at what should of NOT happened? I'm at a loss. Any ideas or suggestions would be appreciated.

[BigKK]

Just my guess, I think she perhaps is embarrassed that you couldn't perform for her.

 

Even though she may understand the possible physiology of it. She wanted to sleep with you, and probably took it very personally. So she is too embarrassed right now to talk it out with you. I'd give it some time.

 

 

More importantly, I'd get your diabetes under control!

[Jennifer89]

Well there's a guy I have sex with... who has a really difficult time getting completely hard, but loves performing oral on me. One day he sent me a pic of his d*ck and it was hard... and it did hurt my feelings a little because he was able to get it hard for a pic but not for me. I know I shouldn't take it personally, but it still hurt my feelings a little when I realized that he did have the ability to get hard, yet is never hard enough for me.

 

You have to keep it in perspective though, you had been drinking, your blood sugars were likely off, and you were trying to perform for a coworker who is 22 years younger then you, which may have created some performance anxiety. It happens. And she probably knows that as well, but after trying for an hour to get you hard, and making her desires for you so clear, it is probably a little embarrassing to be around you right now. She is likely wishing that it had all gone differently, because now you know that she secretly desires to sleep with you, but it hasn't happened. If I told someone I wanted to sleep with them and it didn't work out, I'd be pretty embarrassed the next time I saw them, too.

 

I would privately tell her that you enjoyed spending time with her, and maybe make a light joke about it. Then leave her be to work through how she feels for a couple days. She may need some time before she can look you in the eyes again.