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Kalika19

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My ex and I broke up almost 3months ago we dated for just over 5 months and we broke up on mutual terms I suggested a break to think about if this relationship was working he than thought it was best if we broke up he said its just bad timing and that he was going through alot etc. we stopped talking for a couple of weeks than slowly started to talk and hangout again tried to be "friends" after one day it didnt last we ended up kissing and acting like a couple. We hang out once a week or twice occasionally we text occasionally. I still really like him and he likes me I need some advice what to do I told him yesterday we need to let go and go our separate ways and move on because its to hard and he sent me this.

"We still have deeper emotions for eachother and friend won't work at this stage to be honest I thought I'd be able to slowly move on but I haven't deep down I still see the possibility of a future relationship and that is why I can't let go. Last couple of months I've been going to bars and clubs and there hasn't been one night where the idea of hooking up with another girl has even remotely crossed my mind. Your always on my mind and I am constantly asking myself what I want in my life right now and I just do not know with regards to relationships and career paths. I need you in my life in some way or another"

What do I do? My sister said he is being a bit dramatic seeing as we only dated for 5months. Should I continue to see him should I not and maybe he will come around sooner and realize he wants to be with me?

Advice please

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YES- it can be VERY hard to 'let go'.. and the only way to 'accept' this is to remember WHY it is you two broke up to begin with.. dont ignore that factor.

 

You DO both need your proper time apart, I think in order to process these decisions and your issues. But you can't do it this way.. could get worse or very complicated emotionally.

 

Best to NOT try and be 'friends' either. As that cannot work out, when you both still have these 'feelings' for each other.

Have a heart to heart with him and make it clear the 'facts' of the break up.. and no mind games.

 

Especially if this is for the best...

Is it time for a 'break'? Is it best, right now in your lives?

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I have to disagree slightly with others as I don't think he only wants your friendship, he clearly wants more. He said 'i still see the possibility of a future relationship'. Whilst i find this an unfair thing to say (because it leaves you both in limbo) it sounds as if there's more to his feelings than he thought initially.

 

You can carry on seeing him and hanging out, but don't fool yourselves and call it 'just friends'... because you will basically just end up together again and you can see where it goes. But be aware it may end in tears.

 

OR you can cut contact completely and move on, and see what happens. I know it's hard but if you've tried everything else and all else fails, it might be worth trying a complete cut off.

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I have to disagree slightly with others as I don't think he only wants your friendship, he clearly wants more. He said 'i still see the possibility of a future relationship'. Whilst i find this an unfair thing to say (because it leaves you both in limbo) it sounds as if there's more to his feelings than he thought initially.

 

He also said he doesn't know "with regard to relationships." He's sending a mixed message and in my experience mixed messages means mixed feelings and you don't want to wait around for some dude to decide you are worthy. Ultimately, though, he'll take the friendship while you will continue to suffer. Not fair to you.

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That is what confuses me is how he doesn't know what he wants I feel like he should take the time to figure it out. I was in a similar situation a few years ago with my ex boyfriend I ended things and soon after tried to patch things up but he needed time anyways I wanted over six months than we no sooner got back together and broke again so I feel like that was such a waste and I worry that would happen again which is why I don't want to wait around it makes me feel like I'm not worthy if he really liked me or loved me wouldn't be want to be with me and not have to think about it? I really like him which leaves me unsure of what to do I just feel so sad since the breakup and I hate feeling like this.

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