Is my EX girlfriend playing mind games with me or does she miss me?? Please Help

[NiceGuy710]

Hello everyone, so my EX and I broke up back in August of this year. She broke up with me because she said that she had lost feelings for me and the relationship. Up until now there has been very little contact between us and of course I still love her and miss her so I tried to get back together with her several times. Of course she said no each time so finally I decided to try and move on. So for the entire month of October I had no contact with her at all but then just a few weeks ago she randomly calls me and tells me that she was in my neighborhood and wanted to come over and see me. So I said yes and she came over, I was expecting her to tell me she misses me or loves me or something, but unfortunately she kept the conversation very general and only talked about whats new and how is everything and etc. Another thing I had noticed was she was wearing the necklace I had bought for her a couple years ago, after we had broken up she took it off but now all of a sudden she is wearing it again. Anyways so after talking for a while she told me she had to go then left. So the big question is, what does this all mean? Is she just playing games with me, or does she miss me?? Any thoughts on what this means are greatly appreciated. Also to add, the next day I decided to text her to start conversation but unfortunately she never responded then a few days later she texted me back but only to ask me for something because she needed something from me. This is all very frustrating but I really need to find out whats going on so I can move on with my life or get back together if thats even an option at this point. Another thing to add, I have tried to direct approach of talking to her about what she feels and such but it did not go well. So I have no idea what to do right now. Thanks.

[sharky988]

Yeah, she's playing games with you.

 

After a month of no contact, she wanted to be sure you were still available as a backup plan in case she ever changes her mind. You gave her what she wanted, so now she knows she's still got you there waiting. Now she doesn't need anymore contact to confirm this, so she's done -- for now.

 

Stop being her safety net. Go No Contact for real so you can heal and move on! Here's a guide to help you: link removed

[Mesemene]

Either what Sharky said - or she's doing it as a "see what a nice person I am" boost for herself. "See, I'm a good person, I can even be friends with my ex!" Screw that.

 

And either way, it's not something you need. It'll set you back and ultimately make you feel worse.

 

You were going the right way before. Back on the path of NC. Believe me, if she REALLY wants to reconcile, she would get in touch in a way that will leave no doubt. She was only doing this, one way or another, for herself.

[NiceGuy710]

Thank you guys. I really needed to hear this from someone. I plan on doing NC, it's actually almost been another whole month of NC with her since that day she showed up at my apartment randomly. So I've been going strong again and plan to stick with it. If she tries to make contact with me again I will just ignore her calls or texts. It's just been hard moving on since shes my first GF and we were together for over 2 years. But I will try my best to move on using NC and will use this time to self improve. Thank you again for the advice guys!

[PurpleButterfly]

Perhaps you should delete her number or block her? This will stop any temptation. But it's entirely up to you. I think this a pattern dumpers normally follow... they break up and then check in to make sure everything is all right to get rid of any guilt. But I could be wrong, I'm just talking from my experiences.

 

Good luck

[SooSad33]

What she's doing is little 'nothings'. Don't mean much, sadly.

Don't over think these things. Continue NC so YOU can work on healing over this.

UNTIL she actually tells you she wants to come back & work on things- don't bother with her.

 

You've done your bit, you've tried. Of course she'll miss you- that's normal. Be careful though NOT to end up in the 'friend zone', as you cannot be her 'friend', until you ARE over her and those 'feelings' are no longer.

tc

[Shainet]

Maybe she wants you to chase her.

[NiceGuy710]

That's what I thought at first too but then when I tried to contact her after to hangout or grab coffee or something she totally ignored my text. So it feels like shes just messing with my head. Or maybe trying to keep me on a leash so she can always have me there to go to if she ever needs someone. I don't know shes acting totally different now ever since the break up, sometimes she'll act very nice to me and other times she can be completely mean to me.