Ex Gf going to marry somone I know. I feel like dieing

[Qac]

Today is the worst day i could ever imagine. I dont know what is happening around me. I'm dead with everything.

 

I was doing fine (just fine) when this friends of mine.. tell me that there's his friend who is getting married to a girl and her name was _____ . and guess what its my EX.

 

 

We broke up because she told me she cant marry me (due to parents pressure, and religious differences). I tried to explain here thats the culture here in South East Asia. Its just 3rd month of break up and i was trying to cope up the loss of her. She dumped me in just 3 days. I'm in NC since then its about 2.5 months of NC.

 

 

Please help me.. i beg you guys. What should i do ? I know i have to stick to NC and i will.. but this feelings is killing me. She is getting married in January. I dont know what to do.. I'm sorry im totally helpless.

 

Really need help....

[marshmallito]

What should you do? Take a breath, sleep on it, see what tomorrow brings.

[Mesemene]

You just, through no fault of yours, mind you, ended up with some of the issues that tend to plague FB users that keep peeking on their exes.

 

You caught a glimpse of her life.

 

Is it a rebound relationship? Good chance. Does this affect you in any way as far as your actions, what you need to do to care for yourself, or what will be waiting for you tomorrow? Nope. It's HER life and something that will only affect her.

 

So tuck it into the "her and no longer applies" side of your mental inventory. Yes, it hurts. Like a punch to the gut, it hurts, because it came out of nowhere. Take a deep breath and turn your back on it. What today has in store for you is still there. All the things you've been working out, everything you've been (hopefully) telling yourself during NC about being a separate being from her and worth plenty in your own right - still applies. Anything you've been doing for you - you still have it.

 

Chin up, head high. It was an unexpected blow from left field - so keep it out there in left field and keep reminding yourself - it wasn't about you, and wasn't aimed at you. You just keep on keeping on there.

[Qac]

Thanks for your reply. You understood this perfectly as this came out of nowhere. Yeah i know this might be rebound in some way but there's a big big problem here.

 

This is her arranged marriage. And dont mind but these things still happen in our culture. So apparently she is getting married to someone she does not know personally. And they will be living together.

 

You are right i should show my back to this. Its her life. She took the decision and she dumped me. I just really cant get over this breakup. Its my first love, since teenage. I dont know what should i do.. how should i react. I'm just down and gone big time. just hoping something happens soon.

 

I have to admit i want her back. But this is not the way i should live.. i need to be strong. I dont know what will tomorrow bring. Just keeping myself UP and fingers crossed for tomorrow.

[bw92116]

Refocus on yourself, and make own emotional health your highest priority - more important than any relationship.

[Twidom]

Honestly there is nothing others can tell you to feel better. It's something you have to go through by yourself...Hang out with friends, find hobbies, do stuff to keep your mind BUSY.

 

Why does this help? Because you will not be thinking about the things that make you sad. This is the cure? No, it is not. Time is the cure. Only time can heal these kind of things...

 

Your family and friends love you and they will be there to help you if you ask them. Try to be positive. I know it's hard to be positive and I honestly have no idea the pain you must be in right now, but you HAVE to try. Don't give in. Many people have been in your situation and eventually they get out.

 

Stay positive. Stay here with us at ENA.

[Qac]

Refocus on yourself, and make own emotional health your highest priority - more important than any relationship.

 

 

I'm trying my best... Still shocked and cant eat anything...

[Qac]

Honestly there is nothing others can tell you to feel better. It's something you have to go through by yourself...Hang out with friends, find hobbies, do stuff to keep your mind BUSY.

 

Why does this help? Because you will not be thinking about the things that make you sad. This is the cure? No, it is not. Time is the cure. Only time can heal these kind of things...

 

Your family and friends love you and they will be there to help you if you ask them. Try to be positive. I know it's hard to be positive and I honestly have no idea the pain you must be in right now, but you HAVE to try. Don't give in. Many people have been in your situation and eventually they get out.

 

Stay positive. Stay here with us at ENA.

 

Thanks for writing here.. i really appreciate your answer. I know i have to get out this but i cant help myself. I cant hang out i dont know.

 

My problem was i had no friends! All i did was just spend all the time with her. It hurts now.. I wasted soo much time just for her? She was never that serious with me.

 

Dont know what will tomorrow bring. Just waiting for my life to get to next step.

[Shainet]

I read somewhere that hunger affects your mood. I was like you op. And i had to force myself to eat because i was desperate to heal and move on. Eat something, even a little and increase that day by day.

 

We will get through this. After some time, she will just be a memory to you. And you will find someone else, someone more deserving of your love. Your ex is not the right person for you. If she is, will stay with you and be loyal to you.

You deserve someone better.

[Twidom]

Thanks for writing here.. i really appreciate your answer. I know i have to get out this but i cant help myself. I cant hang out i dont know.

 

My problem was i had no friends! All i did was just spend all the time with her. It hurts now.. I wasted soo much time just for her? She was never that serious with me.

 

Dont know what will tomorrow bring. Just waiting for my life to get to next step.

 

 

I know how it feels. I really do...I also "dumped" all my friends and stopped doing everything else just to be with my ex...It's a grave mistake that we both made but things will get better. I PROMISE YOU...

 

Many years ago I heard someone say something that I took to myself and I repeat it everyday:

 

"The real battle begins when you think you can't stand anymore" I really don't remember where I heard this but it's been engraved in my mind ever since. Hang in there...You can do this! This is not the end. Things will get better.

[Live-N-Learn]

Religious difference is not something that can very easily be overcome. If this was such a big issue for her then she should have never considered you a potential partner to date. As for her getting married so soon. This says to me she is impulsive and really not very mature in her thinking. You dodge a bullet.