jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 You're also a straight man. I don't associate being busty and having long hair as being attractive because I'm not a straight man. I like guys taller than me than guys my height. Most women do. That is a fact. You can't expect half the population to be attracted to something they are not because you feel it's not fair. You'd probably be pretty angry if someone told you why what you are attracted to is 'wrong' and 'creepy'. It's extremely hypocritical to try and police women's preferences because of your feelings. I don't recall finding anyting out of the way hot. Big boobs are far more normal than being very tall. Some women can gain weight in their boobs. Guys can't eat a bunch of big macs and grow 8 inches. That and needing a guy to be an inch or two taller really isn't that big of a deal. But when a woman needs a guy to be like 8 inches taller, then that is odd. And yea....I can expect people to get over their fetish for extremes. Since there is no reason for a 5 foot tall woman to expect a man to be atleast 6 foot for her to even look at him. It's nuts. Link to comment
allcity Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Man, ENA really can be an odd place sometimes. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 And by the way, anyone who is asserting that it's creepy for women to want to be next to tall men because they're looking for a father figure should be saying men who like smaller, petite women want a daughter figure. If we are going to create a parallel of Freudian hypotheses. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Man, ENA really can be an odd place sometimes. That's all you have for me, lol? Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 That statement about "small women looking up at big men like they're their daddy" is a pure assumption. You have no idea what's going through any woman's head, unless she tells you, in full self-honesty, that's what's going on. You can pull any presumptuous inference out of the sky and call it creepy -- doesn't mean you've identified anything real. It's most lkely that she wants some guy to protect her. Which is rediculous since she can buy a taser or gun to do that for her. Instead of some giant muscle bound idiot. It's also completely irrelevant that women can shave, who has the immutable characteristics, etc. -- we are talking about what you feel attracted to and why. Though in fact, if women can shave and are pressured to by society, you're even more making the point that women have been conditioned to enhance their femininity by exaggeration of nature, to make you feel more like a man by contrast. Which continues to disprove your statement "people shouldn't need the opposite sex to make them feel like their own sex". Men aren't pressured? Isn't it a fact that shorter men don't get paid as much as tall men because tall men are respected for simply being tall? Same goes for dating. What about guys that aren't full of muscles? Sorry, but it's very hard to grow an f'n 6 pack. Much harder than it is for a woman to simply keep her weight under control. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 And by the way, anyone who is asserting that it's creepy for women to want to be next to tall men because they're looking for a father figure should be saying men who like smaller, petite women want a daughter figure. If we are going to create a parallel of Freudian hypotheses. I personally have no problems with a womans height. And honestly, at 5'7 I think it would be easier if the woman were within my height range of about an inch or two either way. No need for neck straining or anything like that. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I don't recall finding anyting out of the way hot. Big boobs are far more normal than being very tall. Some women can gain weight in their boobs. Guys can't eat a bunch of big macs and grow 8 inches. That and needing a guy to be an inch or two taller really isn't that big of a deal. But when a woman needs a guy to be like 8 inches taller, then that is odd. And yea....I can expect people to get over their fetish for extremes. Since there is no reason for a 5 foot tall woman to expect a man to be atleast 6 foot for her to even look at him. It's nuts. "Women are wrong for not finding me attractive but I am not wrong for not finding them attractive" This is just mental gymnastics, Jonny. Some women like tall guys and they are perfectly normal and fine in liking them. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 "Women are wrong for not finding me attractive but I am not wrong for not finding them attractive" This is just mental gymnastics, Jonny. Some women like tall guys and they are perfectly normal and fine in liking them. What women am I saying I don't find attracitve? Little people? Pregnant woman? 400 pound woman? O wow, i've really went out of my way there with extremes. Link to comment
tiredofvampires Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Jonny, expecting people to "get over their extreme fetishes" is going to leave you a very disappointed man. Because no one has a single reason to meet your expectations. Bottom line for men: Height preference is absolutely like any other preference. When we say "preference" we mean, what is favored, whether that is something inborn, developed, changed through body modification, or personal style. "Preference" covers everything that falls under, "I want to see x in my partner more than y." Period. If you are a guy (though really, if you are a PERSON), this means that you are subject to scrutiny physically, socially, psychologically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, sexually, stylistically, culturally, and probably a dozen other "-ally's". Biologically speaking, and broadly speaking about secondary sexual attributes it's taken millions of years to develop these patterns that can be recognized, so your DNA hand can help or hurt your chances with women (collectively as well as individually), and that's not women's fault. That's a matter of how the human brain works, and it's completely fair in that women are equally (if not more) subjected to this degree of scrutiny and demand. It's part of our ancestral history. You can accept that or you can argue, for your own purposes, that women should try to change what is innate to them because it would make you feel better. There is absolutely no reason for women to "get over" a preference, so long as she has a selection available to pick and choose from. It is also unwise for men with complexes about their height or other qualities to falsely correlate the traits they wish they had, but don't have, with inferior qualities in their competitors, as that's categorical (and fairly wishful) thinking. Bottom line for women if you are judging a man's entire masculinity on his height, you're short-changing yourself and to repeat an earlier point, if you further hurt your chances by making heels more important than the many qualities of the man in front of you who may not have seemed so short without your wardrobe being as it is, to me that's a skewed way of weeding guys out and all I can say is, good luck there. Invariably, you will be very young with lots of options and selection to be determining things on that basis, but that outcome runs the risk of backfiring because you're focused on the less important things. Bottom line for everyone Biological urges/instincts are undeniable, but they are NOT universal, as we are complex individuals with all sorts of variation, and so in the end, all of these over-general "rules" can be broken and transcended. And having said that, no person has any authority to dictate how, what, where, and when these rules "should" be broken by others. It's a matter for each individual to determine, to arbitrate within themselves. Link to comment
allcity Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 That's all you have for me, lol? I wasn't referring to you Link to comment
allcity Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I think you're making a pretty irrational process into a highly and overly rational one. Heh! Nah, I've just had some long relationships in my life and all but one of my best friends since I was a baby have been female, so I've always been the guy that the women in my life went to when they wanted to talk things through and get advice. And over the years we all came to the conclusion that it's really great to better understand your internal motivations, rather than just always acting off instinct, as what feels right and what we're attracted to very often isn't actually right for us - it just feels like it, due to our experiences and conditioning up to that point (not that I'm saying liking tall guys is any way a harmful thing, though, obviously). The downside, though, is that it's made our default problem-solving process one of psychoanalysis. Although I do think that this whole Oeidipal/Elektra thing goes WAY deeper than you're giving it credit for. But also height has never negatively affected my dating life and I have never had any physical preferences when it comes to who I'm attracted, so to be honest this whole subject is one that I struggle to understand much from either side. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 What women am I saying I don't find attracitve? Little people? Pregnant woman? 400 pound woman? O wow, i've really went out of my way there with extremes. You're making it sound like guys being tall is a bad thing. It's not unhealthy. It's not 'freakish'. It's not an oddity. It's not even extreme in the slightest...Don't try and bring down tall guys as being freaks of nature or reduce them as a fetish. That's very unfair. You don't find a lot of people attractive because you're human and humans have preferences. You're acting like YOUR preferences are "reasonable" and women's aren't. If women are finding men within their preferences, then they are perfectly reasonable. My boyfriend is 5'9''. 6 inches short than me. Well, really only 3 since I practically wear heels to bed. Perfect height for me. Is it wrong I rather date a guy that much taller than me? Is it wrong that I rather a guy not be over 6'1''? No. Having preferences is not wrong. I can lament all day about things that make me unnattractive to the opposite sex. My boobs are different sizes. My knees are knobby. I'm not blonde. My hair frizzes when people speak the word "humidity". My teeth were all over the place until I spent years and thousands of dollars on braces. And people are not at all obligated to find me attractive. I have zero right to put down the women they do like as being 'freakish' or 'unnatural' or describing their attraction as 'fetishistic'. That's just mean. I change the things I can. I highlight the things I like. And, I don't become embittered. Link to comment
Reflective82 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 His last gf looked like a wall?! Haha that is soooo funny!! And yes agree on weight being the biggest issue for men MC x Link to comment
Reflective82 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I do have daddy issues all city but not all women do- I don't think it is creepy if a woman likes a dominant man- I think it's biological. I find it a physical turn on if a guy is dominant- it is literally a physical, sexual thing. I do like feeling small and protected- what is wrong with that?? It is definitely not a weird fetish for a woman to want to feel protected Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 You don't find a lot of people attractive because you're human and humans have preferences. You're acting like YOUR preferences are "reasonable" and women's aren't. If women are finding men within their preferences, then they are perfectly reasonable.[/QUOTe] Mine are rather resonable. Did you see what I posted? Tho I guess the pregnant woman thing wasn't very nice, but i don't want a woman with kids, nor do I want any myself. But that seems reasonable to me. My boyfriend is 5'9''. 6 inches short than me. Well, really only 3 since I practically wear heels to bed. Perfect height for me. Is it wrong I rather date a guy that much taller than me? Is it wrong that I rather a guy not be over 6'1''? No. Having preferences is not wrong. That isn't abnormal at all, due the 5'9 being average height. But when someone needs an extreme amount of height to make up for their own, then it gets weird. I can lament all day about things that make me unnattractive to the opposite sex. My boobs are different sizes. My knees are knobby. I'm not blonde. My hair frizzes when people speak the word "humidity". My teeth were all over the place until I spent years and thousands of dollars on braces. And people are not at all obligated to find me attractive. I have zero right to put down the women they do like as being 'freakish' or 'unnatural' or describing their attraction as 'fetishistic'. That's just mean. I change the things I can. I highlight the things I like. And, I don't become embittered. I could do that all day long to, but i'm not with this topic, since nobody has ever shown to have a problem with my height. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I do have daddy issues all city but not all women do- I don't think it is creepy if a woman likes a dominant man- I think it's biological. I find it a physical turn on if a guy is dominant- it is literally a physical, sexual thing. I do like feeling small and protected- what is wrong with that?? It is definitely not a weird fetish for a woman to want to feel protected It makes no sense in this day and age. A woman doesn't need a warrior man to protect them. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Mine are rather resonable. Did you see what I posted? Tho I guess the pregnant woman thing wasn't very nice, but i don't want a woman with kids, nor do I want any myself. But that seems reasonable to me. That isn't abnormal at all, due the 5'9 being average height. But when someone needs an extreme amount of height to make up for their own, then it gets weird. I could do that all day long to, but i'm not with this topic, since nobody has ever shown to have a problem with my height. You don't see a problem with being the judge of what is a reasonable thing to be attracted to and what is not? Link to comment
Slimpee Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Why is this even an issue? Height is a masculine trait. I mean, why are men attracted to breasts? "I dunno, i just do.". Women dont have to apologize for a preference for tall guys. Short guys, sorry you didnt hit the inches lottery...buck up and do something that makes you feel good about yourself. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 You don't see a problem with being the judge of what is a reasonable thing to be attracted to and what is not? Nothing i'm saying is extreme. I'm not asking for a model. Not asking for 36dd's. Not asking them to be 18. A woman needing her man to be a foot taller than her is extreme and not normal. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Short guys, sorry you didnt hit the inches lottery...buck up and do something that makes you feel good about yourself. And whatever a really short guy that's like 5'4 does to make up for his height will possibly get him accused of having a complex. If a really short guy wears shoes that make him look taller, it means he has a complex. If he works out and gets muscles, it's the same. If he acts louder to get attention, if he drives a nice car, gets money,. Basically anything that could be a positive for a very short guy is somehow made out to be a negative by alot of women. Link to comment
Slimpee Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 And whatever a really short guy that's like 5'4 does to make up for his height will possibly get him accused of having a complex. If a really short guy wears shoes that make him look taller, it means he has a complex. If he works out and gets muscles, it's the same. If he acts louder to get attention, if he drives a nice car, gets money,. Basically anything that could be a positive for a very short guy is somehow made out to be a negative by alot of women. I guess you can't win... With that attitude anyway. Ps, your height is only a "problem" if you let it be. Nobody controls your reactions but you... Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I guess you can't win... With that attitude anyway. Ps, your height is only a "problem" if you let it be. Nobody controls your reactions but you... I don't have a problem with my height. I just think it's hypocritical that plenty of women get upset when guy likes something like a woman that isn't overweight or big boobs. But many women want things that men can't even change, like height or penis size. A woman can lose a few pounds, but a guy can't get taller or make his junk longer or thicker. Of course we are told to suck it up and change to compensate for it. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 Nothing i'm saying is extreme. I'm not asking for a model. Not asking for 36dd's. Not asking them to be 18. A woman needing her man to be a foot taller than her is extreme and not normal. How do you define normal? Because I see a lot of short women with tall guys. If it's common, it's normal. Link to comment
Cognitive_Canine Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 I don't have a problem with my height. I just think it's hypocritical that plenty of women get upset when guy likes something like a woman that isn't overweight or big boobs. But many women want things that men can't even change, like height or penis size. A woman can lose a few pounds, but a guy can't get taller or make his junk longer or thicker. Of course we are told to suck it up and change to compensate for it. But I would call out an overweight woman who tried to shame men for not liking her body type. You are the one being hypocritcal here. Link to comment
jonny15 Posted November 30, 2013 Share Posted November 30, 2013 How do you define normal? Because I see a lot of short women with tall guys. If it's common, it's normal. Someone being a foot taller than someone is not normal. It looks like a freak show. Link to comment
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