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Never thought I would be in this boat


MissLily13

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My now ex bf and I have had our ups and downs. We broke up for about 2 months after living together, we fought a lot and just needed the space. We got back together, and things were working well initially, but started to fall short again. While we were split up, he met a girl, said he never slept with anybody, and never went out with this girl, and was no longer in contact with her. We got into a huge fight last night, and we broke up again. We both got really mean in the heat of the moment, and he told me he still talks to this girl afterall, that he gave another girl a hat that I bought him while we were dating, and that he slept with another girl the night we broke up. Five minutes later he took it all back. But when he said al of this, he had names and had examples all ready to go. I don't care that he took it all back, I know he did it, and it kills me that I actually trusted him. I'm so crushed and I don't know how I am ever going to move on with my life How am I going to get over my best friend and this betrayal, how am I going to trust again? I have never felt this hurt in my entire life.

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At least the truth is out now-

Time to aim yourself & your life AWAY from him. He's not honest and has girls all over the place... UNLESS you'd rather look at this in a different light, that it ONLY happened while you two were 'apart'? and I guess in those circumatances, he'd have that right?

 

It's going to hurt very much with a break up- these are never easy....

BUT.. think about everything. Do YOU want him or this crap in your life where you two break up every time you fight? Is this healthy? I dont think so.

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Wow, I think all I'd say is, "Well, thanks for finally being honest with me, now leave." He was a player all along and you do not need that. And it sounds like the two of you just never meshed to begin with. Relationships are supposed to be about joy and getting along--not fighting all the time until someone spills the beans about their bad behavior. You can use this to close the door, go NC and find someone that you are truly compatible with.

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Sorry for you pain… in time it will get better.

 

That said,

These episodes of failure will repeat throughout your life unless you take a break and learn from them.

 

Carefully think back on all clues of you mistakes and then don't repeat them.

 

Btw

Moving in together hides/masks his true intentions behind a wall of wishful thinking, chores and bills.

The end result, you waste the prime years of your life

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Thank you guys for your support. It has been a rough few days. i keep thinking about it and just can't believe this is all happening still. I feel numb, but most of all, betrayed by somebody who was supposed to be my very best friend. That relationship is definitely over, I just want to stop hurting like this and move on and find happiness with somebody who loves me for me and brings out the best in me. I feel like that is so hard to find

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Oh yes, he never moved back in the second time around. I broke up with him as soon as I found out. We have not had any contact. It's all just my emotional scaring at this point and trying to get over how hurtful all of this is. Its so different than just breaking up because of arguments or compatibility. I don't know how people get over emotions like this.

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When you start to see him for who he really is and can see that you didn't deserve it and it had nothing to do with you, you'll start moving forward. It takes time, which sucks, but many many many have gone before you and on to better situations they hadn't dreamed of before...and you will too.

*hugs*

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