I broke my husbands nose

[Sineadc09]

Here's the story my husband and I have been married for almost 6 months he's active duty army/we also live together. Our marriage started rocky, he cheated on me and the woman claimed to be pregnant which I found out the other day it was a big lie I contacted her mother and the only reason I got her information is because I looked her name up from an email that was sent, this woman claiming to be pregnant had been texting my husband from a text app pretending to be her own mother kind of like a Norman bates thing with out the serial killings lol when I spoke to her mother she didn't have one clue what was going on.

 

 

My husband and I have been having problems that started with this made up situation. We just lost our son due to miscarriage about a month ago were both depressed about that. I've recently found out my mother has started using drugs, I'm grieving still about my cousin committing suicide besides my marriage I'm a complete mess!

 

He came to me crying saying that he needs to get his life together and that he's become a very hurtful person and that he doesn't want to hurt me any longer and he feels bad because I've done nothing but good and have stood by him long story short divorce was brought up and he said that he doesn't know if this is what he needs or what I need because our marriage is damaged due to my trust issues and insecurities he has caused with the things he's done. I just felt him acting differently so I decided to check the phone bill and found out he was talking to this young lady, she said that she met him on Facebook and she told me that he said he was getting a divorce a few weeks ago Mind you he just came to me about how he was feeling four days ago and I was so hurt because he told a complete stranger this and he's making friends of the opposite sex via Internet not to mention talking to them at this point. I went down stairs it was pitch black dark and I threw my phone I thought I was aiming at the wall but instead it landed on his face and broke his nose it was an honest mistake/accident.

 

He said that he forgave me and that he loved me. The army separated us for 72 so far it has been almost 48 under direct orders were not allowed to even speak or see each other because the army will press charges on the both of us. I talk to him and the conversation has been dry so I asked if he was still in love with me and he replied not as much as he used to be because it hurts to know that someone he loves did this to him. Out of all he has put me through I never ever ever loved him any less. Putting my hands on someone/getting so upset to the point I want to throw things is not me I completely F'D up. I need advice what am I to do, I love my husband and want to work things out I know he's not cheating on me but the fact that he has been talking to other women this isn't the first time we argued about this I feel like he doesn't need any female friends who are single/or ones from the Internet. I have friends of the opposite sex but they are married!!!

 

All we have argued about is him talking to this crazy woman saying she was pregnant, he didn't believe me when I said she was lying and that I was suspicious. The woman who he met on Facebook says she indeed met him on Facebook, he says he met her in church a lie is being told I know! While we were in the hospital I told him how I felt about it and I did not approve. I also reset my phone to factory default I went into the phone bill today to get his moms number and what do I see this woman's number again he talked to her from sun up to sun down. I want my marriage to work, I know he isn't perfect but neither am I people change I've changed from my bad habits. Any advice? I feel terrible because regardless of my marriage being rocky right now there is no excuse for me getting angry losing control and breaking someone's nose. That's against who I am, and my vow to my husband.

[shellyf62]

Why did your Husband want to get married if he is cheating all the time? I don't understand this.

I hate to tell you this but he wont change. He was caught once, promised he would never do it again, and now you have caught him again.

He is a liar & a cheat, and I suggest you divorce him as soon as possible as he will never ever change these ways

[Seraphim]

Some of us have told you several times it is time to get out of this marriage. Just remember you could easily be sitting in a jail cell right now. When your marriage gets to domestic battery it is time to walk away and call it quits.

[Sineadc09]

He cheated once before we got married I know for a fact that he hasn't since! About changing and etc I can't accept that because I was once a cheater in my previous relationship, a liar as well. I'm not that person anymore I have never done any of that in this marriage nor do I plan on it. Just putting that out there

[Sineadc09]

You are correct, but the good out weights the bad. I'm going to continue to try until there is not more left

[Sineadc09]

I honestly just wanted advice for what I did to his nose, and what we could do to repair the marriage. That's all. You guys

[Seraphim]

Are you willing to drag your baby through this train wreck? You said you're pregnant right? That train wreck is not an environment for baby or child.

If you're really serious and very sorry then take some anger management classes and both you and your husband get your butts in for some marriage counseling. The military offers that take them up on it. This is no longer just your life this is your baby's life too.

[Sineadc09]

I guess you didn't read this post entirely. I lost the baby. I went to the doctor for an ultrasound and they found no heartbeat. We lost him last month. And I agree about the counseling, I've set up an appointment for next week as well as my own individual sessions.

[Seraphim]

No ,I read your other thread. I am so sorry about your loss. That is always so difficult. And often it tears relationships apart. I am so sorry for your loss once more. I have had four so I understand.

 

But if you're really serious about working on your marriage you both have to commit to counseling and commit to doing what the counselor tells you.

[shellyf62]

He cheated once before we got married I know for a fact that he hasn't since

 

So you don't class him talking to the girl he met on Facebook as cheating?

[Sineadc09]

Are you married if so how did you ever need marital counseling?

[Sineadc09]

No I don't. But he's dead wrong for it.

[Seraphim]

Is who married? Me? Yes. I have been with my husband for 25 years and married almost 20 years.

[Sineadc09]

Have you been through rough patches that you thought you wouldn't be able to move pass?

[Seraphim]

Yes. I believe most marriages do. But both people have to be willing to work on it and do the work to keep it together.

[junebug123]

I went down stairs it was pitch black dark and I threw my phone I thought I was aiming at the wall but instead it landed on his face and broke his nose it was an honest mistake/accident.

 

Why would anyone throw the phone into the pitch black dark and hit an object which is probably less than a foot long and a foot high exactly. You see when I read this stuff, its like i don't know what else to believe in any part of the story. My opinion is that you need to work on yourself before you can even think of working on this marriage, this time apart from your husband may be a good thing. You are risking your career and your livelihood over a man, why things ever have to get to this point is beyond me, all I know is that people allow this sort of behavior to go on for so long its like what do you expect.

[ParisPaulette]

The only thing I can offer up is if the obvious--you've only been married six months and already the guy has cheated on you with two different women and shows no signs of slowing down. If I recall from your earlier posts he did sleep with the first woman, the one who faked a pregnancy. And now he's chatting up other women and while it may not be sexual yet the fact is he's having emotional affairs and is seeking other women out for what he should be seeking from you. And then the accident with the phone while not directly your fault--i.e. you didn't know he was there you say--but still your anger and frustration caused you to lash out and someone got hurt over that. That tends to happen when one is getting jabbed by a sharp pointed stick over and over again, which is yes exacly what he's doing. But you don't and shouldn't be standing there taking it either until you reach the boiling point.

 

I can't tell you what to do, but you do need to ask yourself why you feel the need to stay married to someone who can't even make it to his own wedding and six months afterwards without feeling the need to run to other women. And no, it's not love holding you there. If it was you'd say to yourself, "He's obviously not happy with me and I have to let him go so we both can heal." It's something else, so get yourself to a counselor and if you're going to stay married to him insist he come too or look at an open relationship where you both get what you can't from each other from other people or something... But staying together with him continuing to do what he does while you continue to let him just isn't working and it won't.

[Hazyillusions]

After all this and your other threads, you're going to divorce him right...?

[lerenard]

I think you need a divorce and some professional help with other issues you have, that have nothing to do with the marriage.

I also think that the guy doesn't love you all that much, he lies to your face and several days after that he is back on track with contacting other women, and he tells one of them he is going to divorce you soon. I don't know who would be able to close eyes on that and try to "fix it". There is nothing to fix in your relationship in my opinion, let it go if you ever want to be happy. He cheated on you, and he keeps doing that behind you back, but you still think there is something wrong with you. Stop fulling yourself, and get a divorce. If he was willing to save your marriage, he wont be telling some young lady on FB that he is divorcing you soon.