He doesn't always climax?

[Gimpyrks]

This is a new situation for me. My new boyfriend and I make out a lot (blame it on the honeymoon phase haha!) and its wonderful we really can't keep our hands off each other.

 

What amazes me is that he can make me climax pretty much every time we make out, but I can't seem to do the same for him? At times it seems like he's close and then nothing. Could it be something I'm doing? I know I should probably ask him, but he doesn't seem frustrated by it. Is this something guys get frustrated over?

[dangletsbang]

You're just making out.....? No sexual contact at all?

[Edmund Exley]

What are you doing to attempt to make him climax?

[oitnb]

I hate to sound like a perv, but are you also dry humping? That's probably why you climax. Clitoral stimulation.

 

If all you're doing is making out, I'm not surprised he isn't climaxing. Totally normal for a guy.

[Gimpyrks]

Okay sorry haha when I say making out I mean handjob kinda assumed that fell into that category. We've had sex once and I just really want to wait until I'm back on birth control before we have more sex

 

Oral is out of the question for me before anyone suggests it.

[mhowe]

He can probably give himself a better hand job, so unless he is giving you a lot of direction...it just isn't doing it for him.

[Iggles]

He can probably give himself a better hand job, so unless he is giving you a lot of direction...it just isn't doing it for him.

 

^^ This!

 

He's had a ton of practice. Quite a steep learning curve for you in that regard.. Whereas oral is something he can't do for himself (unless he's super flexible) and most guys attest feels better than their hand -- to point out the obvious ;-)

 

If you'd rather stick to handjobs ASK him to give you pointers on what feels good for him. Accept that you may never have a 100% climax rate through handjobs. As long as he's fine with that while you're waiting to sex again then there's no problem to fix!

[Dragunov-21]

Yeah. From experience, handjobs just do nothing for me. It's like what I do on a near daily basis, but less good.

 

Making out = kissing, FWIW.

 

I'm not gonna second-guess you if you don't feel comfortable with giving oral, but I think that if that's the case then it's just a matter of waiting until you're back on BC (or use condoms in the meantime).

 

I've been frustrated before during handjobs, in a get-outta-the-way-and-let-me-drive sorta way. That you're not doing things that bring him to climax isn't necessarily an issue though.

[Thorshammer]

I hate handjobs, it hurts just to think of it. Unless you use lotion, it wont do nada for me except make me think that you are attacking me.

[louisecar]

He may still enjoy the handjob, just not enough to orgasm. I would ask him to tell you what he likes when you are giving him one. Let him give you some guidance. Every man is different so no harm in asking.

[figur]

I haven't found handjobs to be a reliable way to get a guy off, but lube helps. I also like manually stimulating both myself and my guy at the same time (kind of tricky!), but that seems to be a winner.

[louisecar]

i find it interesting the men on here saying they dont like handjobs. iv yet to encounter a man who doesnt get off when i give him one. i just assumed all men liked getting them.

[Gimpyrks]

Louise I was the same way haha.

 

I think what makes it frustrating for me (not frustrated at him just the situation) is that behavior wise he seems like he's so close but can't get over that last "hump" (no pun intended haha!) Which makes me believe I'm doing something wrong, but I fully plan on talking to him about it and find out what he likes and doesn't like.

 

He has certainly climaxed a handful of times with a handjob so I don't feel like he doesn't like them.

[MisterEleven]

Honestly, the truth is simple. Girls are just not that good at hand jobs. Guy's are usually so used to their own company that it just doesn't always feel as good. It took me a while before I could cum form a handjob from my gf. You say oral is out of the question, is that a long term thing ? If it is have you told him that oral is totally off the cards? If so how did he react to that news?

[shelty24]

Handjobs always worked when i gave them apart from the first time.. with my first bf-all we did was hj or clit stimulation.. it worked for both of us every time. With my bf now-i rarely give hj coz oral or sex is obviously better but any time i do he cums..

 

maybe you need to ask him how he likes it..

 

as for oral... if thats a permanent thing with refusing to do it then good luck keeping a man permanently. He will eventually get fed up and leave. Im not saying you need to do it all the time but most men expect it occasionally and there usually more than happy to return the favor

[dwaynedsmith]

i find it interesting the men on here saying they dont like handjobs. iv yet to encounter a man who doesnt get off when i give him one. i just assumed all men liked getting them.

I love handjobs, even if I could not climax with intercourse.....getting a handjob, especially with lotion, will always bring me an orgasm

[Deedoo]

Don't take it personally. Some guys are just harder to please. The same way some women are. It doesn't mean he doesn't like what you're doing. In fact, he may love it.