I go out walkin' after midnight...

[Cynder]

I started this to write down my dreams... which lately have been pretty interesting.

 

A few weeks ago I dreamed that an ex of mine died. I figured that was maybe my way of symbolically being over him, even in the subconscious realm. But then the other night I dreamed that he was engaged to someone.

 

Then we come to last night...

 

I was alone in the house I grew up in. I don't live there now, so it was strange that I even was there. But I was there all by myself, and he stopped over. It was raining really hard outside so I let him in to get out of that.

 

There was a 12 pack in the fridge and him and I was sitting in the kitchen drinking and talking. I remember thinking maybe the two of us alone together and drinking isn't a good idea. But my dream self didn't seem to care much.

 

I was telling him about how my first grade teacher was really mean to me and she used to pull my hair. (and this is true, my first grade teacher actually use to do that.) She used to grab the really sensitive hair at the nape of my neck and just pull really hard. I reached over and grabbed his hair the way she used to grab mine, but I didn't pull it, I was just trying to show him. And he turned his face toward me and we kissed. It was just a short kiss at first but then we started kissing pretty passionately.

 

I let this go on pretty long before I stopped. When I stopped kissing him he asked if I wanted to go upstairs. I told him no, we can't be doing this, and I think he probably should leave. He apologized and left.

 

And then I remember sitting there with my laptop really upset and feeling really guilty. I was trying to get ahold of my boyfriend to tell him what I just did. But the computer wasn't working right. I was also debating with myself about if I even should tell him at all. It was just kissing, it's not like we had sex or anything... But I figured I should fess up and tell him and I was really scared to.

 

Then, when I was waking up and realizing this was just a dream, I remember thinking "Man... if I would have realized this earlier on in the dream I would have just let him take me upstairs." I know that's probably not healthy, lol. But I won't deny still feeling sexual attraction for this man.

 

So... that was pretty interesting.

[Cynder]

Before I go into last nights dream I should say that 6 months ago I dropped off an external hard drive at a local computer shop, asking for data recovery. Two months ago, after hearing nothing, I decided to get it back and take my business elseware. Multiple (unanswered) calls, emails and texts followed. Yesterday I called and they actually answered the phone. I asked if I could come in and pick up my hard drive. He told me he has several externals laying there and doesn't know which one is mine.

 

So, last night I dreamt that Aaron and I were somewhere, and he had three hard drives. He asked me which one was mine and I told him none of them were. Then he produced a really big clunky one and I said I know that's definitely not mine, mine was a newer model. Suddenly, he turned into Adam, and he threw the hard drive at my face and then lunged at me. I also became aware at some point during the attack that I was in my old apartment, the apartment Adam and I lived in.

 

Then I was being taken care of in the ER. The Doctor who was taking care of me knew my Mom, and he was telling me what a good woman she is, and he said, "She's never drank a drop of alcohol in her life." I laughed out loud at this... my Mom is the biggest drunk I know.

[Cynder]

So, I've had tw dreams lately involving Exes and people breaking into my house. I need to read up on the meaning of home invasions in dreams...

 

The other night I dreamed my ex girlfriend (who lives in Huntsville Alabama now and is engaged to be married in December of this year) was here. Her and I still talk on a regular basis. She wants me to come to her wedding but I just can't afford to get down there. I'm still recovering from my recent trip out of state to another friend's wedding.

 

But anyway, she was here and her and I were laying in my bed cuddling and watching TV. She was telling me how much she missed me, etc.

 

And later on that same night I dreamt that people broke in here while I was asleep. They were really quit and didn't wake me up. But they took one of my cameras and started videotaping themselves going through all my stuff and stealing from me. They came into my bedroom and taped me asleep while they did some nasty things to me... and they also went into my bathroom and taped one of them dipping my toothbrush in the toilet. In the dream I was watching the video after it happened. Being videotaped while sleeping is creepy... but I'm sure it has a whole different meaning in my dreams then it would in other people's dreams. I'm a film maker, so video cameras, etc have a whole different significance in my life then they do to most people.

 

So... that brings us to last night. I dreamt I got woke up in the middle of the night by a lot of noise. And there was this guy in an orange jacket standing by my bed rooting through my dresser drawers. He yelled to someone else to come and look at what he found. I was too scared to move at that point. Then one other guy and two girls came walking into my bedroom and turned on the lights.

 

When they noticed I was awake they all attacked me. Once I was beaten into submission, the two guys went through the apartment looking for stuff to take. The two girls sat on the bed to keep me there. One of them had a knife and told me if I moved I was "going to get it."

 

The two guys came back in and they all started arguing about whether or not to kill me. I sleep with my cell phone right on the bed, and it was under my pillow. While they were arguing I grabbed it with no one seeing and dialed 9-11. When the cops got to my place one of the girls went to the front door and told them they have the wrong house.

 

When the cops left I tried yelling out the window to tell them this was the right house and these people were going to kill me. But that didn't work.

 

So then I sat there listening to them have this long conversation about what they were going to do with my body when they were done. Thankfully I didn't stay asleep long enough to hear what they decided.

 

I got up to go to the bathroom and went back to sleep... And once back asleep, I dreamt that my ex boyfriend broke into my house. Wow... this is getting about ridiculous at this point, really?

 

This is the ex I was with from age 17 to age 23. He was older and my parents pretty much decided this for me. They were basing their decision on the fact that his family owned a machine shop and that I would always have a guaranteed job there (and they seemed to think his family was rich, but they were far from it.) Also, another reason for their decision was that I "would never find anyone else." Three years in I dumped him. They talked me into taking him back, telling me if I didn't I would spend the rest of my life alone because no other man would ever want me. (Yea... my parents were kind of asshats. I feel mean saying that, but it's true.) So, I took him back, put up with three more years of abuse, and then he dumped me for a woman he met online. And then, a few years later he came out of the closet and is now openly gay. Imagine that... lol.

 

But anyway, I dreamt that he broke into my house. unlike the previous break in dreams, this one happened in daylight when I was awake and had company over. My friend Cassie and her boyfriend Joe were here and we were all standing in my kitchen talking and folding laundry. It is interesting though... I grabbed a shirt from the basket to fold and it was my ex boyfriend's (different ex boyfriend, the one from the first post in this thread) Grateful Dead shirt.

 

And, I was also in my pajamas. Why I would be in my PJs folding laundry with Cassie and Joe is beyond me, but whatever, lol. We were in my kitchen and my ex came and broke my door down. He suddenly became really submissive and not as tough when he saw Joe. Joe is a big intimidating guy. So, he pretty much cussed us all out and left. But before leaving he waled through my living room. I told Joe to go "watch him" because I was afraid he would steal from me or hurt my cat.

 

Then when he was gone I was calling Aaron (current boyfriend) and telling him what just happened. We all just kind of laughed about it, like What the Hell...?

 

Also, it drives me nuts that my spellcheck flags the word "dreamt" every time I use it. I looked it up, I am spelling and using the word correctly. It just bugs me, lol... I was using the word dreamed early on in this thread because I thought maybe dreamt was wrong, but it's not. Apparently my spellcheck is mistaken.

[Cynder]

Last night I dreamt that Aaron proposed to me. I don't really remember a whole lot about the dream... I know we took a trip somewhere down south. This is interesting because in February we are going down to Huntsville to see Aimee, since her birthday is in Feb. and I can't make it down there for her wedding.

 

But anyway, we were somewhere down south, staying in a house with people, and not in a hotel. And we went out to dinner one night and then when we were walking back to the house he popped the question. I was excited, but at the same time confused and surprised. He told me all the reasons he can't imagine his life without me.

 

I accepted, but in real life I think I would have been more cautious about this. We have only been dating a year and a half now, and my experience with marriage so far has been Hell.

 

I don't spend a whole lot of time looking up the meaning of the things I dream... but I was curious and did with this one. Dreaming about being proposed to means nothing but bad things, of course... And this is exactly why I don't look things up that much, it gets old being told bad things will happen all the time.

[Cynder]

Nothing interesting over the last couple days...

 

The other night there was a dream about being at a bowling alley and trying to decide between a black, blue and purple ball. I haven't been bowling since I was a teenager.

 

And last night there was a dream about a whole secret habitat on the north pole. Except the polar ice caps had melted so it was tropical. I was there but not supposed to be there because it was designed for only the super rich. I was trying to escape before they caught me, and there was a small path of shallow water leading to another island where I had to climb over this massive sand dune. When I got to the top of it I looked down and saw a little town down below. When I was standing there I remember thinking "Wow, I'm literally standing on top of the world."

[Cynder]

Strange stuff over the last few nights... strangers having sex in my bed, puppies, kittens, exes... etc. I wish I could write this stuff down in more detail right now, but I'm working overtime this week and just don't have the time. I will get caught up over the weekend.

[Cynder]

Ok, have a little bit of time before I have to leave for work so I'm going to attempt to get caught up with this thread... I've fallen way behind.

 

So, I dreamt that I came home from the gym one night to find my friend Eric C and some girl having sex in my bed. I walked into the bedroom and turned on the light and of course we all three were surprised. But the girl he was with clearly misunderstood the situation. I don't know if she thought I was his girlfriend catching him cheating or what, but she jumped up off the bed, started yelling and cussing me out, then lunged at me and hit me in the face. All along I'm trying to tell her we don't need to fight about it. I live here, you're the one in my house uninvited. That was pretty much the end of that dream.

 

Then later on that same night, I dreamt that my ex boyfriend Aaron R and I lived in an apartment with my ex husband Adam.

 

Adam was hoarding animals. There were cats everywhere and a few dogs. I was trying frantically to clean up all the cat poop off the floor one night. And it was like for every mess I would clean up three more would appear. And I was walking through the kitchen and saw in the corner that one of the cats had kittens. They were adorable white kittens and I felt so bad that they were living in such filth and squaller.

 

I tried talking to Aaron about how we needed to get some of these animals out of here where they would be better taken care of. The whole time we were talking he was sitting on the couch playing PlayStation. He was answering me, but not entirely focused n what I was saying.

 

Then Adam took me aside into another room and told me that things were getting out of hand and that he's sick and tired of Aaron playing video games all the time and me being gone half the time. I was pissed off because I was at work half the time and neither of them had a job. I said I was sick of supporting them both, and cleaning up after all these animals after working all day, and that something had to give.

 

How he reacted I guess I'll never know because that was when my alarm went off.

 

I have more to write... another dream involving puppies and one involving a loose alligator, lol... but that will have to wait until next time I get a few minutes free.

[Cynder]

So, last night was a real doozy...

 

Before I get started I want to say that I do a really good Russian accent. In one of the independent movies I was in I actually played a Russian character. I was fired from a job once after three days because my boss was pathologically paranoid and thought I was lying about my identity. When she fired me she asked me "are you even from the US?" I thought that was such a stupid thing to ask... I told everyone that I really regretted not suddenly going into my Russian accent and telling her I was a spy sent here to infiltrate the US dry cleaning industry (because I worked at a dry cleaner.)

 

So... this dream started out at a party. There was a lot of drinking going on and someone started talking about how good I do accents. So I did my Russian accent for everyone and they all thought it was hilarious. So, one thing lead to another and they all decided I should prank call a coffee shop with that accent. So I prank called this coffee shop and asked them where my husband Vladamir was, f he was there hiding from me. Then I started asking them if they serve Vodka. The girl on the phone was like, "No Ma'am this is a coffee shop, we only serve coffee." And I was like, "Have you ever drank coffee and vodka, it's good!"

 

All these people at this party thought this was hilarious. And so did I, at the time.

 

Then later on Aaron was at my place and we were looking for something to watch on Netflix. We ended up watching this documentary about the US government torturing people. And it showed one story about a girl who did exactly what I did, called a coffee shop pretending to be Russian. And it showed how the government captured her and all the disgusting things they did to her.

 

So after that I was really paranoid. I told him we had to go somewhere where they wouldn't find me.

 

So, then him and I are at some house in the middle of nowhere hiding in the basement. And I was so scared that I wouldn't even go into another room without him because I thought they were going to get me.

 

That was the end of the dream... This was one of those dreams that you wake up from and are so relieved it didn't really happen. It was really terrifying.

[Cynder]

Now it's time to backtrack...

 

So, I dreamt that I went to a small house in a town about 20 minutes from here to stay for the weekend. No reason was ever given why I was staying there. But I had a feeling like I was house sitting for someone.

 

So I get there, and my ex boyfriend Mike is there with three kids and a bunch of puppies. They were Pitbull puppies and he had two Pits when we were dating.

 

The house was one room and it was really small. One of the kids flushed the toilet and it overflowed and the whole room was about 6 inches full of water.

 

I asked him where I'm going to sleep. He pointed to the floor. And then I saw all the puppies drinking the toilet water.

 

I told him no way, I'm not staying here under these conditions, and I was calling the humane society to get these puppies out of here.

 

He got pretty pissed off at me and threw a fit so I left. I took out my phone to call myself a ride home and then started looking up the humane society's number. But that was when I woke up.

 

Why I would agree to house sit for this douchebag is beyond me. But he did house sit for me when we were dating. He smoked in my apartment the whole time I was gone and just flipped his ashed on the floor. He also had his two dogs in here while I was gone and I came home to dog crap on my floor that was never cleaned up.

 

He denied all of this when confronted, of course. I only let him house sit for me because he pretty much begged me to. I thought I could trust him. But the more reading I've done on the subject the more I think the man was a psychopath. And I am serious about this, it's not like I'm just saying "Oh my psycho ex..." like a lot of people do. He showed all the textbook symptoms of psychopathy. He love bombed me in the beginning and then dropped me like a hot rock once he found a more willing victim. I consider myself lucky for making such a clean break. The girl he dumped me for didn't get off near as easy. He really wrecked her life.

 

Anyway...

 

Last weekend I dreamt that Aaron and I were going somewhere kind of far away from here. We were driving through the country to get there. And we saw an alligator wandering around by the side of the road. And this is Ohio, so it's not like alligators are a common thing around here.

 

So we talked about calling animal control, but neither of us could find the number for animal control in the county we were in, or the police's number. So I just called 9-11.

 

The 9-11 operator was a complete ass to me. He accused me of pranking and chewed me out because 9-11 is meant for emergencies only, not for stupid people to use to make prank calls. I tried telling him I was serious. I even offered to take a picture of it with my phone and send it to him.

 

But he told me to get off the line so other people with real emergencies could get through, and he added that I need to lay off the smoking because I have a "gross smoker's voice."

 

We ended up stopping at this house and asking them to call either animal control or the cops. I'm not sure if they did or not, I woke up too early to tell.

[Cynder]

Lol... someone rated this thread as "terrible." Really?

 

I just don't get why people do that. Especially in the journals section where people are not asking for advice but just writing down thoughts, ideas, or in this case dreams. It seems so immature and sophomoric to me. I can't imagine reading someone's journal and then rating it terrible. If something was interesting enough to hold my attention for a while then it obviously wasn't terrible.

 

Whoever rated this thread that will keep reading, I'm sure.

[Cynder]

Two interesting journeys last night... a (sort of) kidnapping by Kitty and her husband, and the classic Oh no I'm late for work dream, with slightly more layers. Can't write them down right now though... I spent my online time doing some last minute shopping.

[Cynder]

A few nights ago I dreamt that I was at some party with Aaron. This wasn't just a house party, it was at a hall, it was like a catered event with a DJ and everything. But there was nothing cluing me in to why we were there, in other words nothing indicating a wedding reception or holiday party or anything like that. We were all dressed up too.

 

I had to go out to the car to get something, and Kitty and her husband were out in the parking lot. Since I recently stopped talking to Kitty and blocked her after her imature display of facebook name calling I wasn't sure how to react when they both cheerfully greeted me. I walked over to the car, figuring I would be the bigger person. The car they were driving was the old car they had when I first met them ten years ago, which is also interesting.

 

So, I don't remember how, but somehow I was talked into getting in the backseat of the car so they could talk to me.

 

It was almost like in the dream the recent falling out between us hadn't happened yet and we were all friends again. I felt perfectly comfortable talking to them.

 

They asked if I wanted to go have a drink with them somewhere else, and I said I would be glad to, just let me go inside and get Aaron because I know he will want to come too.

 

But then her husband put the car in gear and started driving.

 

Then the whole mood in the car changed. Kitty and I were suddenly in a shouting match. She was going on about how stupid I was to get in the car, and telling her husband "You see, I knew she'd fall for it."

 

I reached into my pocket for my phone, only to discover it wasn't there. I left it inside, I figured I would only be a minute.

 

They ended up taking me to this huge arena type place where a wrestling match was going on.

 

Once they were in their seats and paying attention to what was going on, I snuck off. Pretty much the rest of the dream was me trying to find a way to get ahold of Aaron and get back to the party.

[Cynder]

So, the same night as the above dream, I dreamt that Aaron and I were living in the "dream house."

 

Now, I know some people reading this will think I'm nut, but the dream house is a recurring place in my dreams. And I clearly remember the whole succession, from the time I first saw it, looking at it, buying it, moving in, and now I am apparently all moved in and Aaron lives there too. When I bought it my step dad helped me make some improvements to it. Brian and Mica helped me move in. Now Aaron and I live there.

 

This is one of three recurring places in my dreams. There is a bar and a park that show up once in a while too. I am not the only one this happens to either. So, if I am crazy, there are others just as crazy I guess.

 

But anyway, I dreamt I was waking up late and freaking out because it was 2:07 and my shift started at 2. So I was rushing around getting ready for work as fast as I could, and then suddenly I was back in bed and Aaron was telling me to relax, it was just a dream.

 

Now, keep in mind I am still asleep. Aaron was not at my place when I was dreaming this, this is all in the dream world still...

 

So, I thought, "Oh thanks Gods, I'm not late, and I roiled over and went back to sleep. Then I woke up again, and this time I was really late for work and freaking out.

 

And then I woke up (for real this time) to my alarm. Not late for work, no oversleeping, alarm went off just as scheduled.

 

So yea... the classic oversleeping dream but with multiple layers this time. And it was nice seeing the dream house again. It's been a while.

[Cynder]

Last night I dreamt I was with my cast and crew. We were on set but we weren't shooting anything, I think we must have been doing set prep.

 

And Adam showed up with a bunch of old mini DV tapes. We watched them, they were behind the scenes video of Adam and I with our friends back in 2007 when we made our first film together.

 

That was pretty much it. This was a nice dream, no hostility or anyting like that. Anyone who has kept up with this thread knows by now that dreams where nothing at all bad happens are pretty rare in my world.

[Cynder]

Last night I dreamt that I was taking college classes again. This was at the smaller local branch of the university instead of on the main campus. I remember walking around thinking that I forgot how beautiful this place was (because it really is, the building itself is cool and then it's also surrounded by woods.) I remember thinking I should bring Aaron here sometime so he can see it.

 

One of my classes was apparently an art class. We were told to go wander around and find things to draw.

 

There was a girl sitting on the steps outside of the room reading a book, and I asked if I could draw her. The pattern on her shirt almost matched the pattern on the wall behind her.

 

So I drew her. She loved the drawing.

 

And then later on that night at home (and I don't even know how I discovered this) I found out she was a porn star. I found all these naked x rated pictures of her online, and found her blog where she wrote about being in college, etc.

 

I remember being surprised because she seemed so modest when I asked to draw her.

[Cynder]

Last night's dream was pretty interesting...

 

I think it took place about ten years ago, if that makes any sense.

 

I was at my parents' house, and all these people were over, including my uncle, and a long time acquaintance of mine named Kevin.

 

Kevin and I used to be really good friends. We worked together and were also in college together. For a while there we hung out every day. Then we lost contact for a while, and recently we ran into each other again. We became friends on facebook, but that's about the extent of it. He works at a store I shop at sometimes, and when I go in there I actually secretly hope I don't run into him, because he keeps me there for like 20 minutes regaling me with tales about how depressed he is and how much he hates his life. I do feel bad for him, but in that situation there's not much I can do. He has done a lot to put himself in the situation he's in. He's in a really bad marriage, and instead of getting out, he just has affair after affair. Not like I should talk much though, I was in a bad marriage for years and stayed hoping somehow it would all work out. Anyways...

 

Kevin was there at my parents' house along with a lot of our old friends and co-workers. And he had a big announcement to make so he had all of us come out to the front of the house (not everyone that was there, but just our little group.) And he told us that him and his girlfriend were moving to Wyoming. (Wyoming has no significance to me or to him that I know if, that's pretty random.)

 

But, as he was talking I could see in the sky above/behind him, a plane that seemed really out of control. It was looping around chaotically and spraying exhaust in a spiral pattern. Then right after he made his big announcement, the plane exploded.

 

I was the only one who saw it apparently. I yelled "Holy sh--, that plane just exploded!"

 

Everyone turned around to look. I ran around to the backyard and told my family what just happened. My brother and I ran around to the back of the neighbor's house where we could see better. We watched the debris fall from the sky.

 

Then later on Kevin was leaving and him and I said goodbye. We hugged, and I think this was the last time we would see each other before his move, it seemed that way anyway.

 

My uncle had a real problem with us hugging like we did. He was going off. I said "Well, I've known him 12 years, relax." That is the only real inconsistency of this dream. Because everyone even looked younger. My parents and brothers looked like they did ten years ago, etc. But me saying I had known him for 12 years doesn't match up. That's how long I've known him now.

 

But my uncle wasn't satisfied with my answer. He was like "It's a good thing he's leaving, he's a pervert who beats off to schoolgirls!"

 

Then for some reason my uncle decided to take Kevein off alone somewhere and give him a whole bunch of stuff to take with him. He came back carrying all this stuff and loading it into the back of his truck.

 

I made some comment about how I'm surprised my uncle isn't also telling him to load me into the back of the truck. As this was going on I remember looking off into the distance and seeing the burning plane and the rescue workers sifting through wreckage.

 

My uncle called me a name.

 

Then (for some reason my gym bag was sitting there right at my feet) Kevin reached over and picked it up and put it in the back of the truck. I was like, "No, you can't take that, it's mine."

 

Then my alarm went off.

 

I should point out that my uncle and I aren't close at all. I see him like twice a year. Aaron nicknamed him Uncle Cartman because he reminds us both of an adult version of Cartman from South Park. The way he was acting in the dream is pretty true to how he really acts, except I have no clue why he would be that upset about me hugging one of my male friends.

[Cynder]

Last night I dreamt about whales and dolphins swimming in underground industrial tanks. I was with two other people and we had to go down this complicated system of elevators and ladders to get down there. And it was dark and lit up red, (like in a darkroom, for those who've ever been in one.) It was kind of creepy really.

 

Also last night, I dreamt that I got a job waiting tables at Pizza Hut... for some reason. And this job was in addition to the job I already have. I remember thinking there goes all my time to work out and be productive outside of work, etc.

 

My first time I did awful. This couple had a bunch of shopping bags and stuff around their table. I tripped over the bags and spilled some of their food. Then when I went back out there with a mop to clean up the mess, someone had already mopped it and didn't tell me, so I slipped and face planted the floor.

 

My Manager basically told me I wasn't cut out to wait tables, but he offered me a management position. I told him I would think about it.

 

Then after that I went to this bar with an outdoor patio. I was sitting there by myself, and I noticed that Kevin and his wife were sitting right behind me. (I don't know why two nights in a row I've dreamt about Kevin...) They were sitting there fighting.

 

Then suddenly everyone else was gone, and the two of them start messing around. She said, "It's ok, we're all alone, no one can see us."

 

I was like, "Hello, you're not all alone." But they just went on as if I wasn't there at all.

[Cynder]

The holidays have completely wrecked my routine, lol. I haven't had much time to update this thread.

 

About a week ago I dreamt I was at my Mom's house and some kind of explosion left marine life laying all over her lawn. Some of the creatures were still alive. I remember asking my brother to help me pick up a dolphin and put it in her pool. We were able to pick it up and at first I wasn't sure if it was going to survive. At first when we put it in the water it just floated there. But then it started moving around and stuff.

 

We picked up as many as we could and put them in the pool. One was a baby Great White shark. It didn't survive. I told him we probably should get it out of there so it won't pollute the water. And he said we should just leave it because the others might eat it.

 

...

 

And now I'm going to post about last night's dream.

 

I dreamt that my ex (this is the same ex I dream about pretty regularly) called me and asked me to come over and help him put Christmas decorations up. This kind of thing wouldn't surprise me at all, considering he was really into the holidays.

 

So I went over to his place and we put up a tree and lights around his living room. The whole time we were doing this we were listening to music and drinking beer, having a good time. I remember he had all these records. (in the dream, he didn't actually have records in real life.) The records are probably significant in some way, because I collect them. I don't have a very big collection, but it's growing. He just had tons of them, at least four milk crates full.

 

And when we were done putting stuff up, we turned off all the lights so just the Christmas lights were on, and we were sitting on his couch watching tv. We started cuddling and all that. I remember thinking that this is exactly where I want to be and I don't want things to ever change between us.

 

Then one of his roommates came home. And it suddenly dawned on me that I can't be doing this with him, I'm not single and we aren't together anymore.

 

It's hard to explain... it's almost like the first part of the dream took place back when we were dating and then time passed really fast and we were suddenly in the present. Suddenly I became aware that Aaron was waiting at home for me and I felt really bad.

 

Not too long after that Aaron showed up there to pick me up. He wasn't mad or anything but I could tell there was some tension between him and the ex. I introduced them, and now that the lights were on I noticed that my ex looked completely different. He is ten years older then me. When we were dating he looked like the typical older hippie. He was pretty good looking though, even though most people aren't into that style. Now, though, it was like he had aged another ten years, and he was fat with a mullet. In the first part of the dream he looked like he did when we were dating. I remember being embarrassed to introduce him to Aaron because he was just so repulsive looking by this point. I know this probably makes me sound really shallow, but the reality is most people would feel embarrassed in that situation so I don't really feel much need to justify myself.

 

He was telling Aaron about his childhood and why he's so into the holidays as an adult, etc. And while we were standing there, my Mom called me and was really pissed off because supposedly she found all these pot plants growing in her garage. She was mad because she thought I put them there. I kept trying to tell her I didn't. But she told me I better come and get rid of them right now.

 

So I told Aaron we had to go and after we left I was explaining to him that my Mom thinks I put all these pot plants in her garage. We were talking about how it was probably my sister who put them there. That was when I woke up.

[Cynder]

Last night I dreamt about long haired white kittens. They were really friendly but didn't look very well taken care of.

 

I dreamt I was at my Grandma's Salon (in business since 1948) and there were these kittens outside. Their fur was all matted. They were adorable though.

 

I decided to feed them, and there was a bad of catfood inside the salon. But my cat was also in the salon. She went outside when I took the catfood outside and I called her to come back inside.

 

So I started to dump the cat food into a bowl for the kittens, and a dead mouse fell out of the bag. I was disgusted, but one of the kittens grabbed it and started playing with it.

 

I read that kittens represent purity, and mice represent negative emotions. It makes a lot of sense considering some of the recent things I've been feeling.

[Cynder]

I dreamt last night that Aaron's dojo was honoring him for something. And one of his teachers was also a software engineer, like he is. So we went to this dinner thing honoring him, and I remember being kind of bored because they sat there and talked about programming all night. I know nothing about programming so there wasn't much I could contribute to the conversation. But for dinner they served us really fancy sushi. I've been craving sushi lately... apparently I must want it pretty bad, lol.

 

Also dreamt last night that Aaron woke me up really early to go to the music store a block away from my house. I was so annoyed with him for getting me up that early and we got in a little argument over it.

 

And in the last journey of the night... I was with my family. I was the age I am now, but they all were younger. My youngest brother was like five in this dream. We all went to the natural spring by the house I grew up in. We were in the van my parents had when I was a kid. I had my cat with me for some reason... and when we got back from the spring she wasn't in the car. I asked to go back and look for her but my parents wouldn't take me back there.

 

Then it was night time, and it was just me and my brother. My brother was crying and blaming me for my cat being gone. We went in the house and there was a cat in there that kind of resembled my cat, but wasn't. This cat was being all friendly to me, but I just couldn't warm up to her. I was really upset that my cat was gone and also upset that my brother was mad at me for it, as if I let her out on purpose.

 

Ironically when I woke up from this dream my cat was laying right next to me on the bed looking me right in the face, lol.

[Cynder]

Dreamt last night that my ex got a job where I work and I was the one training him. He hurt himself on the job and I also caught him laying down and trying to sleep on the job.

 

Then, even though he was the one who hurt himself somehow management got the idea in their heads that I was the one who hurt myself, and they sent me to a mandatory doctor visit. My Grandpa (who has been dead three years) showed up to take me to the Doctor, and he had a plate of fruit salad for me.

 

It was an odd one...

[Cynder]

I haven't updated this thread in way too long... but it's because I've been depressed lately and the dreams I have during depression are awful. I don't want to remember them so why write them down?

 

But last nights dream has some pretty similar themes in it to one I had a while back that I wrote down in here, so I feel like I should write it down for that reason alone.

 

I moved back into my parents' house for some reason. And even though I was the age I am now, my siblings were all really young, and my Mom and step dad were still married (they separated almost 7 years ago, divorced officially in 2011.

 

I was moving back into my old room, which was full of my brothers' toys and stuff. (my brothers who are now 28 and 26.) I didn't have much room for all my stuff, so I had to put most of it in storage.

 

As I was unpacking and cleaning up the room, I remember thinking, "Why am I here? What happened to my apartment? Where's Aaron?" It was almost like I had minor amnesia.

 

My Mom called me downstairs and was throwing a fit because I guess a pair of my work pants had a sharpie in the pocket when they were washed and black ink got all over the washer. She was yelling at me and I told her, "Grandma was the one who washed them." And she was like, "Ok, blame your 80 year old grandmother, real classy!"

 

I didn't feel welcome at all moving back home... my parents and siblings didn't want me there. It was pretty obvious.

 

As I was trying to set up my room the way I wanted it, I turned around and saw my cat sitting on a box, and noticed that she puked all over the floor. I remember thinking I better get this cleaned up before anyone sees it, they'll all just complain about it.

 

Then suddenly I'm enrolling in school. And this lady gave me all these forms to fill out, and she also gave me one of those things they used to your finger with when you donate blood. She told me not to draw blood yet, we had to wait to do that.

 

She explained to me that I was going to have to take a taxi to school and it was going to cost me a lot of money. I remember thinking "Why can't I just take the bus like everyone else?"

 

Thankfully that's when I woke up... in my bed, in my apartment, and the whole thing was over. Dreams like this may not sound all that disturbing to anyone reading them, but they are to me. Everything about this dream was appalling.

 

It reminded me of the dream I wrote about earlier in this thread where my whole family went to the spring and my cat ran away.

[Cynder]

Lately there has been a trend in my dreams of reliving the past. Dreaming that I am living at home with my parents again, but that I am the age I am now... My Mom and step Dad have been divorced for years, and they were separated for five years before the official divorce. But in these dreams they are always still together, and my siblings are always younger. I'm sure there is a really interesting psychological reason for this. The other night I dreamt of a traumatic event involving both my Mom and step dad. But I was the age I am now and I handled it completely different then I did back then.

 

I also have dreamt a lot lately about working again at past jobs. I dreamt last night that I worked at the place I worked back in 2009 that fired me under pretty suspicious circumstances. That place closed last year... but in the dream I still was working there and doing very well. And I actually showed up one day in my work clothes for my current job. This place had a strict business dress code... where I work now has a casual dress code.

 

I've dreamt twice now that my ex boyfriend is getting promoted to manager at his job and there's been a party going on for him. (I haven't seen this guy in years...) The party was taking place at a restaurant in both dreams. In one dream I was at the restaurant and just happened upon the party, said hi, told him congrats and just walked away. In the other dream I was at the party as an active participant.

 

I also dreamt I was going back to college... to learn to be an X-Ray tech...? This is something I have no interest in. I hate hospitals and wouldn't want to work in the medical field. But hospitals have been showing up in my dreams as of late too.

 

The last time I dreamt a lot about hospitals was a time in my life when I was really depressed. These last couple months haven't been easy... but I am slowly coming out of this funk.

[Cynder]

I'm posting in this thread now just to bump it and make it easier to find.  I still have a pretty interesting dream life.  I might start writing in this thread again even though it's been a really, really long time. 

[Cynder]

Z had to be to work at 5am this morning.  I got up with her this morning and hung out for a bit before she had to leave.  When I went back to bed I dreamt that I woke up in my bed and she was in bed with me.  She said she got sent home from work early because she passed out on the job.  This was a dream, it didn't really happen.  It was weird though because I was sleeping in bed, and then I'm dreaming that she was in my bed with me.  For a second I was confused like, "Is this real?"