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Her first time.


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Last week i wrote a post about me and this girl getting caught by her mom, not having she(she is a virgin). Well her mom got over it and i spent some time with her dad fishing, we had a instering talk. Well it seems more problems are coming up. Two nights ago she wanted me to take her virginity, i mean she flat out told me,"I want my first time to be with you". Naturally any guy would jump on this oppertunity. well I didn't, i said to her,"you know you only get one chance at being a virgin." I thought it would be a big responsibility to take something so dear to her. I mean she been holing out for someone she loves., were both nineteen. We both sat in her bedroom all night watching a movie, she was nervous but i couldn't bring my self to do it. Usually i would have no porblem having sex but this girl i really care for. What should i do??

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Hi there....

 

First things first...I hold upmost respect for you for not jumping all over your girl and humping her brains out!

 

Second, i am a 20 year old female, and a virgin as well....

 

Before i start, i have one question....Did your girlfriend initially want to wait until she was married before having sex???

 

I wanted to wait until i got married, and thought that even if i had met the person i wanted to marry, i would still wait.....

BUT....i have met the most wonderful person, and i know that he will be the one to take my virginity one day...I have not told him this yet.....boy is he in for a surprise

 

So if your girlfriend said this to you, take her seriously and really consider it. You care about her soooo much it seems, so why would you not want to share this intimacy with her??? especially since she WANTS to and is initiating it???

I don't know how serious your realtionship is, but if you truly are in love with her, and she wants to give you this wonderful gift...then take it with arms wide open, because you love her, and she loves you.

 

OK now heres the advice:

 

Before you two decide to do this, you need to sit down with eachother and talk about what you want and expect from it. maybe the reason you were apprehensive is becuase it was a little too spontaneous, and you didn't know how to go about it. Since she is a virgin, she will need extra tending love and care, and you should ask her how you can make this a very special experience for her. Her emotions will be all over the place, it will be so important to kiss and hold her after the act. haha so don't conk out on your pillow, i am sure that's not what you will do, but a friend of mine had a horrible first time similar to what i just said... And also, i don't suggest doing it on the couch in front of the television either...So after you two talk about it, and you tell her you are open to it, you should plan it out, make it an evening she won't forget. Take her out of town, to a beautiful place to stay the night.

 

And if you decide to do this please, please don't forget protection!!!!

 

Happy humping!

mimi20

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1st off .....your god sent if you dont just take advantage.....i lost my virginity at the end of october and so im close to her wanting this experiance....i was scared out of my mind my first time but i do love my bf and even though i didnt flat out say it he was the person i wanted to be my first time he was and it was a good choice and i dont regreat it. i was just wondering how many times and peeps have you been with before her? its just a question it doesnt really matter either way....but i think that if she wants it ( and you do ) you should go for it, you say you care for her so use this as a way to express that, just dont let it become the only thing in your relationship.....that would be terrible for both of you......just remember its her 1st time.....make it special and remember it is going to hurt her a lot and probobaly wont be all that pleasurable the first few times but its a way to make you guys closer if you use it in that way. Just be their for support when she needs it after and realize she will change a little or maybe a lot you never know but she will change i guarentee it. My only suggestion is you ask her before you actually do it not if its ok or anything but if she is sure that way you know...good luck

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I think it's very mature of you to hold out and not willingly take advantage of her. It's a good idea to give the idea some time... Take a few weeks to make sure that she doesn't want to change her mind before doing it. But then, if you both feel ready and you want to, I say do it. It's your choice. Do what feels right.

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Well it seems more problems are coming up.

 

If she is having problems with her parents...there is a very good chance she is considering losing her virginity to, well, basically spite them....

 

you need to find out for sure why she had this sudden change of mind. If it is going to be her first time...make sure she isn't doing it in a way she may regret later.

 

I commend you on being extremely mature and considerate of her feelings on this...and questioning why without taking advantage. She is lucky to have you.

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well i have been with 2 other girls, but i said the only way i would have sex with them is if the got tested for STD's. All turned out to be just fine. She didn't say anything about waithing till marrige.

Also both those girls i was in a realtionship of a year or longer.

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First of all, big props to you for not jumping all over her & taking he future emotions into consideration. When she told you this, were you guys messing around at all or was it brought up conversationally? If your sure she really wants to do this (& you too, of course), then try to make sure its special for her. Not just the act, but the time before & after it also. If possible, take her out for a nice dinner afterwards & like someone else said, make sure you hold & kiss her afterwards.

And of course, use protection!

Good luck with everything!

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First of all, you have gained my utmost resepect for your honourable stance in this whole situation. Quite frankly, I would have done the exact same thing you did bc it was indeed the right thing to do. Many in this forum would say to screw ur g/f's brains out but don't bc at the end of the day you and her may end up with regret.

 

She may be doing this in order to spite her parents so sit her down and have a long deep talk over this bc once you guys have done this, it cannot be undone and it will change ur relationship. If it's not done under the best of intentions and love it could destroy ur relationship.

 

It's good to see there are more guys my age out there who think more with thier hearts and not thier penises. Take care of yourself and that g/f of yours; I wish you the best of luck and I hope you have a wonderful relationship with her.

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