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im jealous coz im insecure


secret007
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my girlfriend cheat on me,. at one time,. then when i confronted her she admit she did,. but that thing didn't leave me for a while it keeps on coming back on me ,no matter how i forget about the cheating she had done,. anyway i already forgiven her,. but one thing i always get annoyed is,. when we are together she looks at some guys and say,. i like him,. his height,. he 's got a cute but,. he has a beautifull voice,. i like his like this and like that,. for me i was insulted,. beaming those complimentaries in my face,. knowing im not a tall guy,. i dont have a perfect body,. i dont have tight abs,. (im quite healthy,. chubby just a bit) ,. i feel insulted ,. thats why i always feel jelous ,. every time she says ,. im going somewhere,. coz im afraid she might end up ,.meeting somebody who has qualitie's that she always tells me,. im afraid,. and jealous please help,.

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bro

all I have to say is your not over her cheating, you may have forgivin her

but your not over it. it seems you still dont trust her and you being hurt

about small flirtations and inuendos.

 

you have to take a step back and ask yourself is it worth it to feel this

way.

if it is then tell her your still hurt and makes you hurt about other stuff

it's always best to talk it out

 

I hope this helps

good luck

 

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Hi secret007,

 

I agree with giggirl. Communication leads to a better understanding and is one of the building blocks in a relationship. I live by the rule: "The only obligation YOU have life, is the obligation for YOU to be happy. If YOU are not happy, YOU cannot make someone else happy."

 

From your message it looks like that you're not happy right now. That means that you will have to make a change! You can try by talking to her and if that doesn't resolve anything, may be it's time to explore some other options. Go by what your heart and mind is telling you.

 

I hope that this helped you and I wish you good luck. Make it happen!

 

~ SwingFox ~

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  • 3 years later...

You're obviously not over the cheating. I really think you should walk away from this girl and find a new one. Cheating tends to be the rule rather than the exception once it happens. If you do want to stay with her, you at least need to confront her about the interest in other guys and tell her that her comments are unacceptable. Good Luck

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purely for discussion purposes, I get a tinge of jealousy if the girl I'm with says somehting like 'hes hot', since I immediately draw comparisons on what hes got that I don't. I try to chalk those comments up to the fact that she's comfortable with me and is sharing those thoughts with me. Its not as if us guys dont think the same thing when a hot girl passes by.

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purely for discussion purposes, I get a tinge of jealousy if the girl I'm with says somehting like 'hes hot', since I immediately draw comparisons on what hes got that I don't. I try to chalk those comments up to the fact that she's comfortable with me and is sharing those thoughts with me. Its not as if us guys dont think the same thing when a hot girl passes by.

 

She may be comfortable with you, but with that comfort, comes taking you for granted, and in turn, finding it easier to simply disrespect you to your face.

 

It's totally disrespectful to point out things like this. Either you're satisfied with the one you're with, or you're not. If not, you're going to look for more. She's simply showing you, that you're not good enough for her. She's also immature.

 

If you ask, that's one thing. If she feels she can say these things to you, she's either into playing mind games with your insecurities, or simply just rude and not very caring; well, I don't see the two being very far apart from each other. It's just not good.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Northalius:

 

I guess I would have to disagree. I can adore my SO and yet be realistic enough to know if I told her she is "most beautiful woman in the world" (even as she's pretty attractive imho) she'd laugh at me and know I had to be fibbin and/or blind. "Hotness" doesn't speak for personality, compatibility or what this person is to you, and that is what dictates satisfaction "with the one you're with". It is purely a physical and superficial description.

 

Women can also appreciate when another woman is hot, more so than men towards men. Would it be disrespectful for her to even voice out that a woman is "hot"? would it mean she has lesbian tendencies and she is disrespecting your manhood? food for thought.

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