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Confused by my ex's actions


zyz30

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Basically to summarize our relationship: We dated for 1 and a half years. We were in love, talked about marriage, kids, all of that. Towards the end, we got really comfortable with eachother. I stopped doing special, romantic things for her. We just got really used to eachother. I loved this about our relationship. When she ended things with me, she told me that she just didn't feel the spark anymore, and I got way too comfortable with her, and that she just completely lost feelings for me. The breakup was very sudden. One day, everything was completely normal and we told eachother we loved eachother; the next day, she said she didn't want to be with me because she wasn't in love with me anymore.

 

So after she broke up with me, I did all of the chasing and pouring out my heart to her. This pushed her away, but we stayed in contact. We've been broken up for almost 5 weeks. We have spoken in some shape or form everyday since the breakup. At first, we only talked because she just wanted to check up on me. Later on around the 4 week mark, we talked more and more and eventually started talking almost as much as we did back in the relationship. Since then, she tells me things like she misses me, and that people tell her that she made a mistake breaking up with me, and that she doesn't know what to do.

 

The thing is lately this past week, contact has been diminishing to where we speak less and less every single day. I never initiate contact. I always wait, and if she wants to talk, then I will talk back. It has come to the point where she only calls me once a day for about 5 minutes and briefly tells me about her day, and then I don't hear from her again until the next day. Everytime we talk, I am just really friendly and never bring up the relationship or say things like I miss her.

 

I am still deeply in love with this girl and hearing from her is the best part of my day. I don't know what to do. How come one minute she "misses me" and the next she seems so cold and distant? Should I start initiating contact? Should I begin saying little things like I miss her? I'm so scared that each day that goes by, we drift further and further apart. I've been sick lately, and her last text to me said "I'm going to bed. PLEASE tell me how you are feeling in the morning". What should I tell her in the morning?

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Ok dude just read your story. The problem is that after the breakup u were too available for her and kept contact everyday and now she knows that she can have you anytime she wants. that is the mistake most people make after being dumped. You should go NC with her, there should be a time apart for both of you so that she can see how important u were in her life, if u keep on communicating everyday with her then she has nothing to miss in the relationship and has no intentions of working out things with you. No Contact is the best option for you and during this time, u should hang out with friends, meet new people and get into some activities like sports, gym or even taking up some new language classes. it really helps to take ur mind off this situation. Along the way u might even meet someone that u would be interested in. Just go out and enjoy ur life. Remember before u met heru were once happy and doing thins that made u happy so i will advice you to get back and do those things that made u happy.. Goodluck dude !

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