Leaving and Never Coming Back

[mikah]

Has anyone done this? Left everything and everyone (family, friends, love) permanently and started a new life finding some place you belong? After 20 years I'm ready to put in the towel. So much waits for me in the future, going to a great school in a great city, uniting with [unknown] family, and starting a dream career and having a dream life. I'm ready to have that life I always wanted. I have few friends and the ones I do, we've all drifted apart and it's time to move on. My mother's side of the family (raised by a single mother), I virtually have nothing in common with being the white sheep in a black sheep family. We aren't close and barely spend time together. And I've recently learned about my father's side of the family, who I honestly see actually bonding with. I just feel like I need to go. Nothing left for me. I love my family, but as long as I'm with them I don't think I can ever truly be myself to the fullest. But of course as with any major decision there's a moment of fear or what happens. Was the decision to leave an easy one? Was there a moment you changed your mind? Are you absolutely miserable now or was it exactly what you needed?

[nutbrownhare]

Yes. Almost a year ago to the day, I rented out my house and moved my belongings 200+ miles to join my then partner. There was not a lot left for me where I used to live, and I'd done a lot of soul searching as to whether I'd be happy living in the new area if something happened to break up the relationship.

 

Good job I did - we split up just before Xmas, but I can honestly say that it was the best move I've ever made.

 

It was horrendous when we first split up, but my gut instincts about the place have been more than fulfilled. There are far more creative opportunities here than where I used to live, I've found it incredibly easy to meet people through shared interests, and every activity I take up seems to open up new opportunities and even more interesting people.

 

You now have an opportunity to start a life on your own terms, find like-minded people and really flourish in ways which are not open to you at the moment. It will be scary to begin with - all major changes are, including nice ones - but any fears will soon be swept away in a wealth of new experiences, new knowledge and the excitement of starting again in a new city. You have a fantastic future ahead of you, and it sounds as though you're ready to grab it with both hands!

 

Good luck!

[iamkaylee]

I've done it. More than once actually. Cut all contact with nearly everyone and everything and just dropped off the earth. I never regretted doing it nor looked back either time and I could/would do it again.

 

It really depends on who you are and what you're leaving behind. If you're doing it for the right reasons it can be very freeing and open all sorts of possibilities for the future. Done for the wrong reasons, it doesn't work. It sounds like you're doing it for the right reasons and it will allow you to be in charge of who you are and where you want to go. Just make sure it's what you really want before you burn bridges.

[samanthajones]

Yes. I've found a place that I fit and I'm glad that I moved. The only thing to remember is that no place is perfect and that your little quirks will follow you unless you decide to address them..but I never regret the move!

[eternalsunrise]

I've done it. It's well worth it! You should definitely embark out on your own and build the life you dream of.

[mikah]

Particularly with family ties I mean, was it just physical like being in eachother's presence. The occasional phone call? Did they understand? Are you completely alienated because of your decision? Any family it was particularly hard leaving?

[mikah]

I've done it. More than once actually. Cut all contact with nearly everyone and everything and just dropped off the earth. I never regretted doing it nor looked back either time and I could/would do it again.

 

It really depends on who you are and what you're leaving behind. If you're doing it for the right reasons it can be very freeing and open all sorts of possibilities for the future. Done for the wrong reasons, it doesn't work. It sounds like you're doing it for the right reasons and it will allow you to be in charge of who you are and where you want to go. Just make sure it's what you really want before you burn bridges.

 

How did you know you were really sure?

[mikah]

But you don't think about going back? Or regrets? And you're right. As I kid I dreamed a lot, and the past few years I've been working on making those fantasies a reality , and it wasn't until a year or two I figured out how to do that and it feels so right.

[iamkaylee]

How did you know you were really sure?

 

It just feels right. The benefits far outweigh the negatives when you look at it logically. Not really anything you'll miss if you leave it behind. You just know.

[grainsofrice]

Hey, I did this with people who can't support me both financially and emotionally. They are just baggages that pulling me down. The saying 'no money...no honey' is true. I don't need fake support.

 

It's hard to walk alone...