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emotional disconnect


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I'm currently in a relationship of 3 years, we are best friends. Although we have no kids together my partner has 2 children from a previous marriage that spend every weekend with us. Lately I have felt like I have been picking up most of the housework (I exclusively do laundry and rarely do not do dishes) I also scrub toilets, make beds and sweep and mop floors, I feel like the inside of the house (the part I am constantly after) looks great and the outside is in shambles, overgrown bushes (so much so neighbors have complained) and an un-mowed yard. I have a back injury and cannot do outside chores without hurting myself. I know your thinking what does this have to do with emotional disconnect, but since my partner has started being "lazy" about chores I've felt like we never talk anymore unless its about chores and then its a fight. Well really any topic is a fight. Any deep topic I ever bring up is quickly brushed off (with one word answers) ignored (by changing the subject to more small talky things) or shot down (with my partner pulling out a cell phone and reading internet jokes and memes). I assumed that maybe I was hammering too much by always trying to discuss our personal experiences, so recently Ive tried discussing issues that mean a lot to me that dont hit so close to home (abortion, women's rights, politics, and spiritual views) to try to open up "deeper" conversations. All of it was meet with the same shut downs. My partner and I use to have really deep discussions about our lives, our future, our pasts, political views, the children, we just use to TALK, A LOT. I was hospitalized 8 months ago with depression and alcoholism. I am now sober, and my partner is very supportive and caring about my issues. We did prior to my hospitalization drink together, now we don't (my partner doesn't drink around me, or go out of the way to drink, but isn't completely sober either, you know the beer a BBQ type). I'm not sure what is causing my feelings of emotional disconnect, I just miss sitting together talking(like we use to do when we would kill a bottle of wine together). I feel like now we we will spend the entire evening on different couches in silence with the TV or music on, each of us in our respective PC. I don't like it and I feel like when I try to say that I feel disconnected it turns into a whole big thing and why would I do that, we seem to be fine as long as we don't speak. I'm at a loss and any advice would be wonderful. thank you.

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