She's never had an orgasm

[kcil]

Hey you guys,

 

So I have a bit of a problem that I need to figure out. I've been dating this girl for the better part of 2 years, and we love each other very deeply. The problem is that I can't figure out how to make her orgasm. Before we got together she hadn't been with any other guys and she says that even by masturbation she's never had one. Now, initially when we started fooling around and having sex I thought that it was fine and that it would eventually happen, but now it's gotten to the point where I'm feeling sort of frustrated. Sex isn't fun when she isn't enjoying it as much as I am.

 

A while back we moved off of condoms and onto the pill because she said the condoms hurt her. But recently she told me that sex still sort of hurts for her... I was a little upset to be honest that she kept that from me for months. We're so open about everything in our relationship... that's really one of the only secrets I think she's kept from me since we got together. I just wish she'd told me so I could help in some way. She has had severe anxiety problems in the past, and I've always tried to help her when she starts to worry. I'm sure that this is linked in some way.

 

I just don't really know where to go from here. It's an awful feeling not knowing how to satisfy your girlfriend when you love her so much...

[pippy longstocking]

It would help if you stopped doing what a lot of men do ..and judge their own sexual prowess on how much we cum .

 

Not having an orgasm doesn't mean a woman is not satisfied , nor does it have any standing because you love her so much , you have taken her lack of orgasm and made is a dissability on your part .

 

if sex hurts her she needs to go and have a chat with her GP .

[m8check]

I think seeking professional help, perhaps an ob-gyn, can help. Painful sexual intercourse is sometimes a sign of medical issue.

[Roxie84]

Well the most important thing, that a lot of people (somehow) don't understand is that only 33% of women can orgasm from intercorse. This is because the other 67% have a clitoris that sits too high above the vaginal opening to be stimulated during sex. A g-spot orgasm is a whole other thing we can get into at another time, but as for giving her a regular orgasm, it is all about stimulating the clitoris. If she has been trying to have an orgasm by sticking her fingers or items inside her, that's probably why she can't orgasm

 

The best thing to try is let her lay back, get comfortable, and gently but firmly stimulate her clitoris with your fingers and/or tongue. If it's her first orgasm and she's not certain about how the feeling is going to come about, you may be down there for a looong time.

 

By herself she should try stimulating it in a variety of ways until she knows what feels good for her, the right amount of pressure, the right movement, etc. Also, she could try using a small "external stimulator" vibrator. You can pick up a decent "bullet" from a sex shop (and some pharmacies) for $10-$20. Using this on the clitoris might give her the jumpstart she needs lol.

 

I hope you give this a try and let us know if there are any improvements!

[becomingkate]

Roxie84: By herself she should try stimulating it in a variety of ways until she knows what feels good for her, the right amount of pressure, the right movement, etc. Also, she could try using a small "external stimulator" vibrator. You can pick up a decent "bullet" from a sex shop (and some pharmacies) for $10-$20. Using this on the clitoris might give her the jumpstart she needs lol.

 

This is good advice. And the toy can later be used by you both, during oral, or doggy style.