Did you ever feel crazy?

[Sukiyaki]

For those who asked almost everyone and their grandmother for advice, wouldn't listen, stubbornness, cried rivers, begged or pleaded, countless texts and calls, searched for countless answers, been to possibly counselors or hospitals, lost weight, etc..

 

At the end of it all, when you felt completely healed..did you ever just say or felt "Damn, all that for one person. Am I crazy?" Or that you owe everyone an apology/thank you or something..? Idk lol

[Mully]

Initially, I tried apologizing to everyone. I felt guilty for being so needy. I kept focusing on if she would take me back even when I told myself I wasn't. I knew it was annoying, but experiencing everything that happened after that has made me a better person. I'm not fully healed at this point, but there's been enough time for me to look back at everything. I'm not happy that this happened, I still have feelings for her, but it's given me the opportunity to work out my problems and be happier.

[charity]

nope. i know too many people who have gone through it that i know it's quite normal. it doesn't feel normal.... but it happens to sooooo many people. ENA helped me to see that i wasn't so unique in my trauma.

[dasilver]

Nope!

 

I've never felt embarrassed if I had to plead or beg an ex back. I'm hurting and scared of losing them.

 

At the end of the day I have no regrets. There are no shoulda, woulda, coulda’s with me. I say to myself “I did everything I could to get back together with him and he still said no. There's nothing more i could have done”

 

So I usually end up healing very nicely…..and just when I’m all healed, they come back.

[JA0371]

I am a pretty reasonable and sane person so it is a big deal for me if I feel like I lose control emotionally...so sometimes I have felt a bit dumb for letting one person get to me so much. Of course, AFTER the fact. I think it's quite normal to react this way. And yes..I have apologized after the fact..for any 'crazy' behavior. A truly crazy person would never think of apologizing lol..

[Sukiyaki]

Makes sense and I understand. At some points I would apologize to my best guy friend for dealing w/me. He just tells me there is no need to apologize. He's been through it himself (though he's handled himself a bit better) lol

[rickyspanish]

im in the crazy stage right now so ill let you know when its over.

[Liraele]

My thought process was more along the lines of: "Wow, for a smart girl, I sure do some STUPID things."

 

But, to answer your question, yes. There were times I felt crazy... and times I acted kinda crazy, because nothing was making sense and I don't do all that great with just dropping things that don't follow any sort of logic.

 

So...

 

Meh.

 

Lessons learned, water under the bridge (and it burned... ), all that jazz.

[Sportster2005]

Emotions often aren't based in logic. I think that's why when we are no longer emotional we see our past behavior as irrational. At the time of the crises we want the pain to stop and irrational or not we will sometimes try anything to stop the pain. So no you're not crazy just human. Well not crazy for this anyways

 

Your real friends shouldn't mind you leaning on them. If others mind they are probably acquaintances or buds, not friends.

[strawberrybonb]

Oh, man. I was all kinds of crazy! Haha.

 

I had times where I fell under the "doing the same thing over and over, hoping for a different outcome" definition of crazy. (Calling the ex, bugging him all the time, begging...)

 

Other times, I felt like I was going crazy because I would be of two minds: I wanted to do everything I could to heal up as quickly as possible AND I wanted to throw myself at my ex and beg for him to take me back. Those two don't work so well together, do they?

 

I'm sure my dearest friend also thought I was crazy because, against her sound advice, I ran off to confront my ex. Multiple times. There was even one time where she took away my phone and physically blocked me from leaving the apartment. After much arguing and crying, she finally let me do my own crazy thing. Needless to say, I told her "Thank you!!!" multiple, multiple, multiple times over the course of the next week. I knew she had my best interests at heart, but the emotional brain was overriding the logical brain in a big way.

 

How's that for crazy?

[Dinocaz]

Well for me its defo "Damn, all that for one person. Am I crazy?" I shudder and cringe when i think back to how I was, ughhh makes me wanna puke. Never ever again ever! I probs was somwhat a little mental back when the split started to gain speed, it was incredibly slow taking months to finally come to pass and then it was swift and lethal in its execution. I was left shocked and speechless until that is I started begging pleading crying harrasing shouting swearing drinking more cyring more begging .... ahhh the list of shame lol. But hey I have forgiven myself and so have those around me that I slowly drove insane with my rants. True friends and true family who love and care without expectations.

[Sukiyaki]

I tend to wonder if the ex in question deems me as crazy =/