How do I make my parents go to the doctor? Please help!!

[Roxie84]

My mom is 62, my father 57. They are both heavy smokers, and both quite overweight. I'll give you guys a general idea of how unhealty they are - - -

 

My dad: he refuses to eat vegetables and fruits. On the average day, he goes out to work, does a very physically exhausting job for 10-12 hours in a plant, then has one big heavy meal. His typical meals involve large helpings of red meat, white pasta with sauce, pizza, lasagna, etc. He drinks 4 to 8 cans of regular Pepsi each day. When he sleeps, he snores very loud, and sometimes makes strange noises. Having done some research, I have a strong feeling he suffers from sleep apnea. He is about 6'4 and I would estimate 280 lbs, muscular build but with a lot of fat around his midsection.

 

My mom: does not move very much, her back and legs constantly hurt, and she has to take breaks when cimbing the stairs in our building (3 flights). She is 5'7 and about 320 lbs. She eats a large meal with my dad at dinner, then will snack for about an hour right before sleep. She drinks about 10 cans of diet 7up every day.

 

Somebody please help! I'm crying as I write this. I want my parents to look after their health, but I have tried many approaches over the years and they just won't have it. I've tried talking to our family doctor, I've tried speaking to them as calmly and understanding as possible... on many occasions I have broken down to tears just begging them to get better. But no matter what, they insist that they are happy and nothing is wrong with their health. Now whenever I try to discuss it, no matter how unique of an approach I try, it causes all-out war with them. One time my mother didn't speak to me for 5 days.

 

I too am overweight, but I have made a lifestyle change. Over the past 3 years I have changed my ways completely, I only eat healthy food that I cook for myself, I started a health blog, I go to the gym 3-4 times per week, and I have lost 80 lbs (and still going). I thought for sure that when my parents saw how much I have changed that they would be encouraged to do the same - but no dice.

 

I just can't force them to get help, and I have exhausted every approach I've been able to find in a book or online. Has anyone had an issue like this? If so can you offer some advice?

 

Thanks everyone

[annie24]

i mean, i don't know what you can do, and it's unfortunate that it's going to probably take a real health scare to get them to change their ways, but even then it probably won't work. all you can say is mom, dad, i love you both and hope you are around for a long long time, but i fear you won't be with your eating and smoking habits. please see a doctor.

 

have you tried cooking some healthy meals for them or suggesting a walk around the block?

 

i am glad you are making positive improvements. maybe that will inspire them. otherwise, it sucks to watch someone you love hurt themselves...

[Roxie84]

Absolutely.. My dad likes going for walks sometimes, but my mom refuses because it will hurt her back. I do cook for my parents, but by the time I get home from work my mom has usually made something "my dad will like" by the time I get home. And a lot of the healthy foods I make, my dad refuses to eat, or he'll eat a couple bites and go out to get fast food or a bag of chips.

 

I know, I'm sounding dramatic, I'm sorry lol.. It's just extremely frustrating because I feel like I've tried everything.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Sadly there is nothing you can do about it. A person has to want to lose weight and eat healthy...it can't be forced.