3 months off/on since breakup....and it's over.

[SouthernGirly]

Here's how things went down:

 

Been broken up with the ex for 3 months now. The first week was NC.

I had to contact him regarding a bill....and kept it simple.

Eventually, we talked out some stuff, angrily, tears, etc. Saw each other a couple times, started talking more. We saw each other a few times every few days. And then, after awhile, in the past month, we've been seeing each other every day, talking as we used to all the time, still say I love you, kiss when we're together, I mean we act like we're together when we're together.....and spending almost every night together.

 

But, we're not together. And, shortly after the breakup, we had a talk about stuff, and he was telling me "baby steps" to bettering ourselves, to being better together later on. He and I broke up a year ago, and, he told me it was similar but different to this break up. We've always had a lot of trust issues, but meand him both have said we're better than we've been, but we're not together again, and he's glad I haven't assumed we're together again. YET, at least he hasn't said we're never getting back together...(thinking of the positives, come on haha)

 

But yeah, it continues, and, of course, there's a lot more history to our relationship, we were together almost 4 years, and during our break up was my bday, which we celebrated together, and our anniversary, and we spent that together, so it was confusing. [FORMER POST from about a month ago]

 

So up until Sun night we were still doing the whole spending days/nights together ,almost anyways, almost every night/day. Sunday night after I left to go back to my apartment to freshen up (we planned on me coming back down there taht night) he texts me a few hours later saying we may need to have a talk soon. That freaked me out and of course I didn't end up goingback down there that night >The next day, lucky me, I found out my parents were separating, so I talk to him at lunch, he comforts me, and, consoles me over the phone, still tells me he loves me, and we don't see each other that day but later he's telling me we still need to talk.

 

Here's a little background to catch you up. The previosu week just a few times (since I was with him all the other times....) hima dn his sister both were hanging out with friends that had just lost theri dad a week before due to the same things they had lost their mom to (drugs/alcohol) so they were helping them cope with it, as normal people would do. Well Whitney/Trey are the siblings, just to give you a head sup. They hadn't hung out before this.

 

Anyways, back to my story. Tues. comes and he lays it out: Fri night things changed for me (one night we didn't hang out like thte 2nd or 3rd time he'd hung with them) and yet Sat all day we hung out, and then he goes out with the guys, and then wants me again after that with him, adn then sunday all he spends with me.....(yeah, right) and, says me and whitney got close to each other.......umm, wow, that's it. We weren't officialy back together I know but we were acting like it and the way he talked to me knows he was on the same page like that because it was like another breakup. Now he barely will talk to me, and we have lots of loose ends STILL b/c we have dogs/bills/stuff together. Sooo yeah, what do you think about this?

 

Also, everyone who knows this girl knows she's bad news, into drugs, has had difficulties raising her kid, etc. I mean, she's in and out of relationshisp with girls/guys, but of course the ex was telling me last week (thinking he was just sharing, not telling me otherwise) that she wants to change since her dad's deaht and be better, clean up, and go back to school, etc. but noone expects her to, or for it to last long but he told one of his close guy friends who told his gf who told me he's taking it sriously and not tryin gto just get in her pants. he changed his relationshi status on facebook to in a relationship today so i'm feeling pretty ehhh.

 

I went by to see our dogs tonight, knowing he wasn't going to be home for a bit, it was 8;45, he gets off at 9, and I get a text from him saying how long you gonnabe there? apparently his stepmom had let him know I was visiting, and I was lik I'm leaving dont worry and I pulled out as son as his dad pulled in and as I left their road, I saw him sitting at his work (his parents restuarnt) just waiting for me to go, I can'tbelieve it's come to this point.

 

In his bed this weekend (sun), telling me he loves me mon. and h's jumped into another relationship, and I mean, everone's lke oh it's a rebound, it won't last, etc but it hurst far worse than anyone has ever hurt me. and I'm dealing.

[lostgirl123]

sounds like to me that he was just trying to keep you around until he finds someone he sees himself more compatible with...

[SouthernGirly]

Well we were acting like we were together up until Sun/Mon. and then he pulls this after hanging out with her like 3 times.....and even everyone that knows both of them thinks its way too fast since we werent acting broken up. He started acting completley 180 from Mon-Tue and will barely talk to me now or see me. EVeryone is shocked by this so Im' not the only one and everyone says it's way too fast like he was just telling me he loved me mon. and I was in his bed

 

I also think his personality disorder stuff may come into play somewhere. Over the years hes researched on it and believed he's go an issue but has never gone for help and his family thinks hes b ipolar sometims too but we just dont nkow. It runs in his family though.

 

AND, due to his mom having drug/alcohol issues we alos think this is another rescuing thing trying to save a woman from ruining her life with it and hurting her kid, etc. its a lot of things, but I alos think its a rebound too. I dont know. It's a lot of messed up stuff.

[Ms Darcy]

I think you need to wise up and realize it's not going to work out with him. Who cares about his new girl. You have wasted half a decade on this guy and it's time to move on.

[SouthernGirly]

This morning I forgot I hadn't turned off status updates on FB from his to my phone.

 

It's like my 'brother''s bday, a guy who's been like my brother for many years, and I introduced him to this ex, they've grown close. He and I hung out July 4th and it wasn't a good day for me since everything was so so fresh. I explained to him everything, and, I knew him and the ex would still hang out but today's his bday so I knew he'd probably be going out or doing something last night. I texted him just seeing what he was doing and he didn't say anything he just said yes I'm doing something. I'm the one that introduced him to that guy, and turns out my ex posted just an hour ago saying great night with friends, happy birthday mr ____ and tagged him, his new gf, and som eother close friends of his, so of course I texted my "brother" friend saying wow, that's why you wouldn't tell me what you were up to last night, you were hanging out with those closet to you last night for your bday and I didnt get an invite, despite what's going on with me and my ex....thanks a lot, I see how I stand vs him. It really hurt.