charity Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 i found this article today and it has left me a little perturbed. i have not copied ALL the article. some points were quite obvious DONT'S ( eg do not have sex in front of your child) but the points i have copied below i would like to hear peoples opinion on. WAYS ADULTS CROSS A CHILD’S SEXUAL BOUNDARIES 1.Touching the buttocks or future erogenous zones. Some parents touch and kiss their child’s buttocks. Most likely this happened to them as a child. They are confused about this boundary. The buttocks should never be touched. The area of the breast of young girls is a future erogenous zone and should not be touched. 2) Putting medicine on a child’s genitals It is not appropriate to put medicine on a child’s genitals. At about 2 years of age, the child is capable of applying medicine to his/her own genitals. The parent should put the medicine on the child’s finger and then ask the child to apply the medicine him/herself. 3) Bathing a child and washing his or her genitals Some parents continue to bathe their child well up into adolescence. The parent feels as if the child cannot clean himself/herself correctly or they feel that it is an act of love to give their child a bath. For opposite sex parent and child, between the age of 4 - 5, the parent should stop bathing their child. The child is perfectly capable of washing himself/herself. If the parent must wash the child’s hair, the child should wear underwear in the tub. By age 8, the child is fully capable of washing his/her own hair without the parent’s assistance. For same sex parent and child, between the age of 4 - 5, the parent should stop bathing their child. The child is perfectly capable of washing himself/herself. If the parent must wash the child’s hair, the child does not need to wear underwear in the tub. Again, by age 8, the child is fully capable of washing his/her own hair without the parent’s assistance. 4) Walking around the house half dressed or completely unclothed. Some parents feel that there is nothing wrong with walking around the house unclothed. They may dress and undress in front of their child and step out of the shower while the child is in the bathroom. For opposite sex parent and child, between the age of 3 - 4, the parent should stop dressing or undressing in front of the child, and they should not walk around the house unclothed. For same sex parent and child, between the age of 7 - 8, the parent should stop dressing or undressing in front of the child, and they should not walk around the house unclothed. 5) Allowing the child to sleep in the parent's bed. Sleeping in a parent's bed is not appropriate. Between the age of 3-4 this practice should be discontinued. The child may be invited to crawl into the parent's bed in the morning for hugs and kisses. 6) Touching, kissing or hugging the child in a flirtations way. Some parents are confused about how to express affection to the child. A mother may nibble on her son's ear and kiss him on the neck. She may push her breasts into his face and call him "her little lover boy." A father may massage his daughter's leg or look at her in a desirous way. Parents should show affection in appropriate ways and avoid treating their child like a sexual object.
pippy longstocking Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 I just think "what bag of crap" I know I wont make the uk debate team with my comments , but that's all I got !
charity Posted July 4, 2012 Author Posted July 4, 2012 i just think "what bag of crap" i know i wont make the uk debate team with my comments , but that's all i got ! ok phew!!!!!!!
Slade Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 It's all BS. My family has always been comfortable being naked around each other because there is nothing sexual about it. None of us are scarred or damaged by it. I'd say it's been a benefit. Remember the famous "wardrobe malfunction"? Wasn't bothered in the slightest. I got to watch many, many people act like immature ***** about it.
Natasha24 Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 I agree with number 6, especially the dad part. I don't know anyone who does that, it seems really creepy.
charity Posted July 4, 2012 Author Posted July 4, 2012 I agree with number 6, especially the dad part. I don't know anyone who does that, it seems really creepy. YEAH a father looking at his daughter in a desirous way is a little creepy. but i would often kiss my son's neck and say ' oh you're so handsome, i wanna ravish you'
Generation Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 Too long, didn't read. Skimmed over some of it and rolled my eyes. If you're a parent, you already know.
OptomisticGirl Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 Yeah, that's complete BS. If I put medicine that had to go on my 2 year old nephew's genital on his finger, he'd promptly stick said finger in his mouth.
Capricorn3 Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 And then we all wonder why society has gone down the toilet. Ugh.
charity Posted July 4, 2012 Author Posted July 4, 2012 the thing is, generation, that the same organization that wrote this has an article on spanking and other parenting issues and it is is so wise promotes such good parenting. so to see these points mixed in with other very wise words was confusing to me. i was thinking, is this for real? if so i am guilty of all charges.
charity Posted July 4, 2012 Author Posted July 4, 2012 i am a single parent and i have seen some single parents act like their son is their man, especially as he gets older. i do not want to be one of those moms. and i am not. but hell i love them and we are really affectionate and physical with one another.
Snowy Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 I remember my parents doing all this when I was a kiddo. I'm perfectly fine.
pinkelephant Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 well, the last one is weird. i probably would break up with my bf if his mom pushes her breast in his face LOL.
pinkelephant Posted July 4, 2012 Posted July 4, 2012 YEAH a father looking at his daughter in a desirous way is a little creepy. but i would often kiss my son's neck and say ' oh you're so handsome, i wanna ravish you' omg, seriously? that's so creepy. ravish? does it have more than 1 meaning?
Messiah Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 Agreed that "I wanna ravish you" is a pretty creepy thing for a mom to say to her son. If he's old enough to know what that means he might become a little sexually confused/shamed by that.
annie24 Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 hm. my mom is a super prude, so there was no nudity in the house hold, i was kicked out of my parents' bed when i was young, etc....so i was pretty much brought up that way, yeah. but like i said, my mom is a huge prude!!
poetryandlyrics Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 These are bull. Except for the last one for obvious reasons. I do consider myself a nudist and I suppose it's because I just came upon seeing nudity as natural. I often saw my mother half naked, same as dad. Not scarred. I do not like to see dad though, but just because it's an "ew" factor in that. But otherwise, no big. I do remember when I was little (5?) that my mother had to put medicine on my genitals. I'm not scarred. I knew what it was for and the intention behind it. And I find that, it stated that if the kid had opposite sex parents, he should wear an underwear, but if the set of parents are same sexed, he doesn't need to? That's just ridiculous and kind of belittling. I did read somewhere that pedophiles can go after little boys while that same pedophile who is a male and happens to be straight also.
Rangafro Posted July 5, 2012 Posted July 5, 2012 The message I'm getting from the article is "avoid anything related to sex and pretend it doesn't exist, or be damned as a perverted child-abusing sicko."
charity Posted July 5, 2012 Author Posted July 5, 2012 omg, seriously? that's so creepy. ravish? does it have more than 1 meaning? yikes!!! i just googled it to see what you are talking about!! that is NOT the context i use it in. in the dictionary there are different meanings for it ( ''to fill with strong emotion, especially joy'' OR It can mean to fill with joy, delight, charm, captivate, attract. ). i live in another country and here we use it as a very positive word.
pinkelephant Posted July 6, 2012 Posted July 6, 2012 yikes!!! i just googled it to see what you are talking about!! that is NOT the context i use it in. in the dictionary there are different meanings for it ( ''to fill with strong emotion, especially joy'' OR It can mean to fill with joy, delight, charm, captivate, attract. ). i live in another country and here we use it as a very positive word. LOLLLL thats hilarious. okay.
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