Will he come back? :/

[lorelaijones]

Hi Guys! Hope you can help this broken heart...

There is this guy I met last November.

In the beggining we were not really serious about each other, but as time passed we started getting really close. We spoke everyday almost all day by sms and we saw each other several times a week. We started to build many memories together and completed 8 months going out.

However we never talked about really being commited to each other.

Last June,12 (valentine's day here in brazil), I was very upset all day because he didn't wish me happy valentines or something. I told him I was not going to sleep over because I was upset. Then he said sent me a picture of the surprise had prepared. I told I was going and then he told me he was already going to visit his parents.

Since then we started fighting because I felt lost about things, I did not know what we were and he told me he could not compromise to anyone right now, because he is starting his business and there's a lot of money involved, money from his father.

It all sounded like a big lie to me. And I decided to break up.

He kept insisting that I should wait for the business to open, then it would be fine... and I agreed.

The thing is, three days after, we were together and I received a message from my ex boyfriend (one I haven't talked to in more than a year!).

The message really sounded like we still had something, but we don't. He was really pissed and did not believe me.

He told me I was lying when I was talking about commitment and that we shouldn't see each other anymore.

I tried calling, texting, he wouldn't answer. I think he is seeing another girl (two days after).

After a few days he sent me a message telling that things went wrong and he is taking care of his business and his own life.

I really care about him. Do you think he will come back?

Do you think I should do anything else to make him trust me?

I stopped texting and calling but its being really hard... Help

[SuperDuper]

All you can really do is send him a final heart-felt account of what you want in the relationship. Tell him that he's the only one you want to be with and that you would love to work things out. You can't harass him so after this attempt all you can do is back off and begin to move on emotionally.

 

You cannot sit back and wait for him, because days will likely turn into weeks, months, etc. If he comes back, then great. If he doesn't, then at least you'll be on a healthy path emotionally. If all else fails, chalk this up to a learning experience for the benefit of future relationships.

 

To answer your question, none of us know if he will come back. People and relationships are too unique to guess what's going on in his head or life (job, other girls, etc.) I think you'll be fine regardless if he comes back, but you must focus on yourself and not stuck on hope. IF he is to return, it will likely be when you're starting to get over him and he's wondering where you've been.. positive things can come from no contact.

[lorelaijones]

Thanks for your reply...

I have told him in the first days that I wanted to be with him, that there was nothing between me and my ex and asked him to believe me. However he did not answer most of my messages. He said he had nothing to say.

Do you think I should try talking to him again? (one week has passed)

It is really hard to keep silence, but if it's the best thing to do, I'll have to take it...