confused1979 Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Hi all, well I have moved from posting in the get my ex back and healing after a break up forums to dating I am 32 years of age, so I have obviously dated a lot but this one girl has got me stumped. I met her on an online dating site; I was skeptical at first but have used one on and off for a couple of years; it is a good alternative to the traditional methods. She requested me, I accepted and the first conversation was just a lot of fun. She gave me her number, we text back and forth and then caught up on the weekend (couple of weeks ago). It was a GREAT night, so much fun, we were both laughing the whole time. She suggested we catch up again, so we did about 4 days later in a relaxed setting at my place. We were going to go for a hike etc. but middle of winter and heavy rain so we relaxed on my couch and watched a dvd. Once again had a great time, I kissed her and we agreed to catch up on the sat. She was initiating contacting me via text but then had to cancel sat for family reasons but suggested we catch up on the Monday. I work evenings and she had the week off. On Monday morning she messaged saying, sorry I can't come I have to work all week. It was no drama as of course work comes first. She said she was sad we wouldn't get to catch up. Anyway....I have hidden my profile as I didn't want to keep getting requests and trying to get to know several people at once. Maybe I am different but after I meet someone a couple of times, I tend to put all my eggs in that basket and give them all my attention. It could be nothing but she has gone form texting me all the time to not much at all. I know I just need to relax and go with flow and I will but just wondering if I am missing some early signs that she is not that interested. Everything on first two dates suggested she was. Oh and she started reading 50 shades of grey and said last night she has made excuses to all of her friends so she can just go home and read lol she is loving these books. The thing that has got me a little concerned is she has stopped texting to say hey, how's your day etc..but when I logged onto the dating site and clicked on her profile again. She had just recently logged on. OK...so if anyone read that, thankyou!! I know I might sound crazy, it is just that I have been through two recent breakups and this girl is great fun and made me completely forget about my ex, allowing me to realize there are other great women out there. Advice please I said to her last night if she can put the books down then we should catch up on the weekend. Ball is in her court, so I will not contact her again unless I hear form her. Just curious what people think. Oh and I was only keen to catch up so much early because she could possibly be going away for a 3 month period, so I wanted to get to know her before she did Oh and could it be that she is actually just so into this 50 shades of grey that she has kind of switched everything else off for a bit??? My name confused1979 really does suit me lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jordesse Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 It's hard to tell...How old is she? Sounds like she's interested but she might just be having 3rd date nerves and cold feet. She would know that you have hidden your profile so this would tell her you're keen to start something with her. This puts a bit of pressure on her as she knows you are "putting all your eggs in one basket". It's also coming up for the 3rd date which in itself could put pressure on her. You've already kissed so being the 3rd date, there might be an expectation of futher physical developments. I think you should put your profile back up (even if its just to make new friends) and pull back a bit. Yes, leave the ball in her court and do not contact her again. Dating should be fun and help you meet new people. The whole idea behind dating a few women at a time is so you don't become emotionally attached straight away. It's great that she made you forget about your ex but the last thing you want is to be invested in this new woman when she is dating around herself and not ready for anything too serious. Try to relax and enjoy meeting new girls and refrain from overthinking. There will be the right girl for you but you may need to date a whole lot more until she shows up. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
confused1979 Posted June 29, 2012 Author Share Posted June 29, 2012 Thanks for your great response jordesse She is 30 years old and is ready to meet the so called one and settle down. I am usually so relaxed but might of come accross a little strong too soon. Only had best intentions but she might of thought I was a little too keen too soon. I will wait and see what happens, if she doesn't contact me over the weekend, I will put my profile back up and start again Do you know where the off switch is for overthinking?? ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jordesse Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Don't worry, you aren't alone with wanting to know where the off switch is lol I wouldn't mind knowing myself!! Anyway, nice to meet a fellow Aussie! I'm in Canberra. Can I ask what part of oz are you from? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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