SnowWhite7 Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 I'm 25 and I went on a date with a 36 year old. He knew how old I was so it wasn't like he didn't know. We seemed to think that the age was too great. I don't really think so. I'm more mature than my co worker who is about the same age as him. She parties, never furthered her education and never left home [she's Asian but I don't see how that's an excuse not to leave home]. My friend got engaged and has the same age difference. I admit I felt jealous of my friend while I recently dated a guy who I never knew where I stood with him. He said he wanted a relationship, yet went completely weird on me for no reason. Should I tell this 35 year old about my friend? I'd liek to prove him wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 I don't think you can talk him out of it, with any silly examples. If he thinks the age difference is too bIg, nothing you can do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 I think you should also let him go. Have more pride than trying to convince someone to be with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 I agree. Maybe your last attempt at a relationship is influencing how you feel right now? You don't have to prove to anyone you are worthy of being with. You are awesome. And if you start trying to convince someone who has told you "this isn't going to work", then it is you who is going to suffer from that. You don't need to prove anything to him. You just need to prove to yourself and reaffirm that you are good enough for yourself. The right guy will come along! This one isn't it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaintWithLight Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 I agree that you should respect what he told you. Citing those examples and arguing that he is unbecoming and will only serve to convince him even more of the correctness of his intuition. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FathomFear Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 The age gap might not be too large for you, but it might bother him. And that's all that matters really. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fudgie Posted June 17, 2012 Share Posted June 17, 2012 If he's not comfortable with it, then he's not. It's his feelings and he should be respected. Accept what he's saying and leave him be. Trying to "convince" him to be with you is disrespectful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite7 Posted June 18, 2012 Author Share Posted June 18, 2012 If he's not comfortable with it, then he's not. It's his feelings and he should be respected. Accept what he's saying and leave him be. Trying to "convince" him to be with you is disrespectful. Really? I also thought it was pretty "disrespectful" when he gave me mixed messages. But what do I know? He didn't mind when he invited me to his bedroom and we made out. Why do guys do this? They encourage you/ put pressure on you. And if you do [i didn't- only made out with him] then they try and turn it on you, for some reason? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Just because he is uncomfortable with the age factor as far as a relationship goes, doesn't mean he does't want to have sex with you!!! If he has already sent up a red flag w/ regard to the relationship, then don't let him get past your boundaries. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camus154 Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Really? I also thought it was pretty "disrespectful" when he gave me mixed messages. But what do I know? He didn't mind when he invited me to his bedroom and we made out. Why do guys do this? They encourage you/ put pressure on you. And if you do [i didn't- only made out with him] then they try and turn it on you, for some reason? I don't know if "guys" do this, but obviously this one did. Who knows? Who cares? He's not interested. Move on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite7 Posted June 18, 2012 Author Share Posted June 18, 2012 Yet a few years ago I actually got dumped by a guy for NOT sleeping with him on the first date. Go figure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntress0527 Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 If he's uncomfortable with it there is not much you can do to change his mind about it. I know it sucks but that's just how it is. You can't force him to be with you comparing yourself to another co-worker. Also stating her negative quailities shows immaturity so judging by what you wrote you may not be as mature as you think are and he may have saw that. Could be a number of reasons why he doesn't like the age gap but none of us know that. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mhowe Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Yet a few years ago I actually got dumped by a guy for NOT sleeping with him on the first date. Go figure. Not sure that qualifies as "dumping" ---it qualifies as not having a 2nd date! And good for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowWhite7 Posted June 18, 2012 Author Share Posted June 18, 2012 If he's uncomfortable with it there is not much you can do to change his mind about it. I know it sucks but that's just how it is. You can't force him to be with you comparing yourself to another co-worker. Also stating her negative quailities shows immaturity so judging by what you wrote you may not be as mature as you think are and he may have saw that. Could be a number of reasons why he doesn't like the age gap but none of us know that. Good luck! I didn't actually tell him about my co worker though. I was just using an example. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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