SicFounder Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Well, this really sucks. I feel destroyed. I met a very cute girl when I went out for a drinks the other night, she wasn't drinking because she was on meds. We talked a while, eventually we started talking about sex and what we like, didn't like, etc. It lead to us making out and got pretty heated. We didn't go any further. Upon leaving, she gave me her number and told me to text her and she'll have some sneak peek pictures for tomorrow night. I get home, wait about an hour, then text her. She texts back and says she wanted to go all the way, but didn't want to seem easy. Okay, understandable. She then sends me a pic of her just in her underwear. Then some nudes. We text, exchange pics for about 5 hours. I tell her I'm going to bed, she tells me to text her when I wake up. I thought it was cute. I text her when I wake up and the first thing I notice is her texting style. It was less texty and had full words none of the letters and numbers for words. I assumed she was texting different the night before because of the situation. She sends me more pics, some details look different but I didn't think anything of it. We texted all day and when I got home from work, I asked if we were going to meet up tonight. She says she's not feeling well because of the meds she has to take, so I asked if I could call to hear her cute voice again. She says she couldn't cause she shares a room with another girl and she was asleep. I had no reason not to believe her. This morning, I wake up to 30 or so pics and I instantly notice they're not her. She doesn't text back until about midnight. I confront her (as much as I could via text) and she says, yes they're fake, but the first were real. I never respond and then I get this shocking text "Okay, I'm so sorry. The truth is, she didn't like you. And I'm a guy, I'm gay and was hoping you liked guys. I promise I was going to tell you" Obviously, I'm pissed. I was just getting back to the point where I was letting people in and now I'm sure I'm back to the point where I'm not going to trust anyone for a long while. What the hell would make someone be so heartless? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanaa Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 omg how old is she?? you have nothing to be sad over,i mean she is the freak here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 When you meet someone at a bar and start making out with them and then they claim they don't want to look "easy" but send you naked photos...that is a clue that the woman is totally messed up in the head. Don't go to bars and make out with random women...you are not going to find quality that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SicFounder Posted June 15, 2012 Author Share Posted June 15, 2012 When you meet someone at a bar and start making out with them and then they claim they don't want to look "easy" but send you naked photos...that is a clue that the woman is totally messed up in the head. Don't go to bars and make out with random women...you are not going to find quality that way. Like any guy, I wasn't making out with her to show I wanted a relationship. I wanted to get to know her and see if it would go that way, but it obviously didn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SicFounder Posted June 15, 2012 Author Share Posted June 15, 2012 omg how old is she?? you have nothing to be sad over,i mean she is the freak here She's 24. Not mentally of course... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Like any guy, I wasn't making out with her to show I wanted a relationship. I wanted to get to know her and see if it would go that way, but it obviously didn't. There is an expression "you get what you pay for" meaning if you are looking for cheap you will get cheap in every which way. I once bought a garlic press from the dollar store and the first time I used it, it broke. After that I went to a regular store and bought one of better quality and it didn't break. By just wanting casual hookups, you are selecting for the type of woman who is also into casual hookups and may not be attuned to life's social graces. She clearly does not have social graces. Casual hookups are completely self-serving...they are about taking care of physical needs only and having "fun". Consideration for the other person typically doesn't factor in. It is simply a "me, me, me" type of mindset. So if you are looking for no strings attached fun then you have to accept that you are going to attract a lot of loser women who are very selfish and self-involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
agent1607307371 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Ugh, if that's the kind of drama you get with her and you didn't sleep with her, imagine the drama you'd be getting if you had slept together. Some people are just ugly inside. And you have work at not letting them get to you. It's hard, but it's the only way to get through without becoming too hard for the world. Her and her roommate sound incredibly immature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntress0527 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Here are the strikes: 1. Met a girl at a bar 2. Didn't drink because she was on meds 3. Made out with you within hours 4. Sent naked photos within hours That really should've told you right there- she's a nut and/or easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pinkelephant Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Okay, just because she made out with him doesn't mean she's cheap. Sometimes, there's chemistry and you're just in the mood. Having said that, the behaviour after that is pretty sketchy. OP, I think you already know to ignore them all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
agent1607307371 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Okay, just because she made out with him doesn't mean she's cheap. Sometimes, there's chemistry and you're just in the mood. Having said that, the behaviour after that is pretty sketchy. OP, I think you already know to ignore them all. Exactly. The OP was making out with her too. It's her behaviour after that which is incredibly poor and shows a lot of basic disrespect for people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Okay, just because she made out with him doesn't mean she's cheap. Sometimes, there's chemistry and you're just in the mood. Having said that, the behaviour after that is pretty sketchy. OP, I think you already know to ignore them all. Most people who make out with strangers at a bar have done that before and then some. Yes, cheap people do make out with strangers at bars because they are in the mood. You don't have to actually have full on sex with someone to show cheap behaviour. Classy people do not go to bars drag someone to a corner and have a makeout session with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huntress0527 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 Most people who make out with strangers at a bar have done that before and then some. Yes, cheap people do make out with strangers at bars because they are in the mood. You don't have to actually have full on sex with someone to show cheap behaviour. Classy people do not go to bars drag someone to a corner and have a makeout session with them. +1 I agree. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
agent1607307371 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 @CAD - so SicFounder is cheap as well? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 @CAD - so SicFounder is cheap as well? I gather the point of that question is really to find out if I have a double standard, which I don't. I personally would not want to date a guy who has casual makeout sessions with someone he met at a bar or anywhere else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
agent1607307371 Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 No, the point of it is that you're sayingf that SicFounder got what he deserved because he made out with someone in a bar. It's not uncommon bewhaviour, it's not bad behaviour. It's not a behaviour you can judge someone as a person on. Any time you have dealing with a stranger you run the rick of them being a git, that shouldn 't stop you from being open to new people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 15, 2012 Share Posted June 15, 2012 No, the point of it is that you're sayingf that SicFounder got what he deserved because he made out with someone in a bar. It's not uncommon bewhaviour, it's not bad behaviour. It's not a behaviour you can judge someone as a person on. Any time you have dealing with a stranger you run the rick of them being a git, that shouldn 't stop you from being open to new people. When anyone engages in casual sex or makeout encounters, they need to expect the risks involved. There is no friendship set up, no connection, nothing, nobody owes anyone anything...it is just two people succumbing to physical needs. In an ideal world people would respect other people..but in an ideal world people who are in committed relationships wouldn't cheat, wouldn't blow off their partner and treat them like garbage. If people in a committed relationship can't even treat their partner properly, how can anyone have the expectation that a casual physical encounter with a stranger is going to result in a respectful interaction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SicFounder Posted June 16, 2012 Author Share Posted June 16, 2012 I don't believe I'm cheap, but if trying to get some action from another person that is clearly after the same thing makes me cheap - so be it. I don't make these guidelines. Though I knew the potential risks, I never imagined that THIS would be a risk. Used as a cheap laugh. I thought maybe a false phone number, or a fake name. That type of stuff. I'm not even looking to date anyone, not at least after a few months of getting to know and trust them. I made this post cause I felt crushed by the fact that this pathetic display of human indecency had happened. Like many people, I posted here to get some comfort and some positive words from the community. It was not my intention to start a debate or any argument. I find it hard to talk to people I actually know about my personal life (yeah, I know how that sounds). But it's easier for me to post here and it helps calm me down and keep trucking forward. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazyaboutdogs Posted June 16, 2012 Share Posted June 16, 2012 Sadly there are a lot of cruel people out there, even people who you have set up a friendship or a relationship with. There are a lot of people who play sick and twisted mindgames and some of those people do it to those who had set up enough of a rapport to trust them. There are just some people like that...this woman you met being one of them. You can't know if someone is a decent person or cold and cruel until you get to know them better. The woman you met is probably like this in relationships..because who she showed herself to be to you, as a stranger, is a good indication of who she is with people she knows. You met a real dud and there are plenty of those kind of people out there. So try not to waste another moment of thought on her....yes, it hurts, it stings, it makes you feel foolish to have pursued someone like this...but remember the real foolish person is her, who doesn't know anything about social graces. Just file this away in the back of your mind...there are decent people out there who wouldn't behave like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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