When is hard to get behaviour a sign of not interested?

[moonlite]

I met a very cute girl in a party (which I left within 20min cause of the terrible dj's). I talked with her for 10 minutes got her number and told her we should meet up soon. She was with two other female friends when I approached her, and both of her friends liked me. For some reason, she felt like cold and not as enthusiastic as her friends.

 

About a week later, I met with her, we had some coffee, talked some more and we talked about meeting up another time soon. A week later, we met again for a dinner, during this I hold her hands, which felt cold and she acted cold. What was surprising is that when I asked her to give me her hand while I was driving, she just clapped on my hand in a insecure/shy/unexperienced way. I felt like despite her being the type that probably gets approached quite alot (she is very attractive), she has no experience at all. Then many things happened, her having exams, me travelling and we ended up not seeing each other for like two months. This made me kind of think she was trying to play hard to get or was like doubting, as during those two months, she ignored my phone calls a few times, and in most cases, I had to take the initiative to call her.

 

After the 2 months, I called her and scheduled a meeting with her. An hour before the meeting I called her to tell her I will be an hour late. Suddenly, she surprised me by saying she felt sick and suggested to meet up another day. I called her again a few days later for a date.

 

So last week I met with her, and wanted to make it more clear that I am only interested for the real stuff (relationship and everything that comes with it) so tried to be more romantic to her by touching and kissing and noticed that she again was very cold and kind of hard to get. She took initiatives like suggesting to go to the beach (where there was no one!), but for some reason just tooo damn cold.

 

I even joked about it telling her we should give each other some blood, cause of her being very cold and relaxed, and me more an active type.

 

Now she has resits (which is true) which means we wont be able to meet for two weeks again, and it seems like she is slowly backing off and ignored my last text telling her I wanna see her asap.

 

I feel like I completely wasted my opportunity to get closer to her. On all dates, she dressed VERY well and knew how to show her beauty, but at the same time, I am beginning to think she is not interested at all and just too shy to tell me.

 

Her mom knows about me, during the last date she opened up ALOT, talking more about herself etc. making me feel I am getting closer to her, but now with the last text and the excuse of having to study non stop for two weeks, I am getting the idea that she is just afraid to reject me or just friendzoned me?

[Tom1990]

Wow, over two months of the cold shoulder? That's not "hard to get." That's "done."

[The_Seeker]

Advice for you that I recently learned because my friend did the SAME exact thing to me ;] she's a girl by the way,

 

When someone ignores your text/call but doesn't return them until days later, I end it. One day is fine. But days or weeks later. Forget it.

 

When someone LETS YOU KNOW until the last minute without telling you the day before or call you to let you know, NEVER get with that person again.

 

I decided that friend of mine is superficial. So I'm not bothering to do much with her. Heck i even deleted her my number from my phone. Not interested inf friendship with her.

[moonlite]

Thanks for the replies guys. I assume both of you are males? Any female input?

 

I would like to add that since my last post here, she did not reply to my text, so it seems like she isnt interested or maybe she is just too inexperienced and shy.

 

I like girls that are hard to get, even though that creates more attachment and interest plus she is just too complicated!

 

The day before yesterday, I met another girl while doing my laundry, and yesterday I invited this new girl for some food in my place. Within a half hour, we were in bed! So I might as well scratch off the culture/religion excuse of the first girl off the list!

 

I am in Morocco btw, not my home country!

[SuperDuper]

If she was truly interested I don't think she'd portray the behaviour she has been because it would be too easy for you to misinterpret it as disinterest on her part. If she truly liked you she wouldn't let you think she's disinterested in my opinion, unless she's playing games of course (and in that case she's not worth it).

 

Just back off and do your own thing. If she contacts you in ~2 weeks when she's supposedly free then make a decision then. As for now I think you should write her off mentally/emotionally.

[The_Seeker]

Thanks for the replies guys. I assume both of you are males? Any female input?

 

I would like to add that since my last post here, she did not reply to my text, so it seems like she isnt interested or maybe she is just too inexperienced and shy.

 

I like girls that are hard to get, even though that creates more attachment and interest plus she is just too complicated!

 

The day before yesterday, I met another girl while doing my laundry, and yesterday I invited this new girl for some food in my place. Within a half hour, we were in bed! So I might as well scratch off the culture/religion excuse of the first girl off the list!

 

I am in Morocco btw, not my home country!

 

;] I'm a girl and I'm 1 year younger than you.

 

Ugh so you're one of those guys.

[Fantanos]

The first girl is not interested. Trying to kiss her and hold hand that much is not romantic, you most likely made her feel very uncomfortable. Shy and hard to get is not happening here. If she doesn't return your call or reply to a text you need to move on, she isn't interested. I am sorry. Move on to the next girl.

[Heather Dawn]

I agree that she's not interested, but I don't understand why she does occasionally go out with you. Mixed messages, for sure.