Timahani Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 Just needed some advice: A childhood friend of mine, never verbally confessed his love for me, however, he has made many passes at me in the past that I just kind of ignored. I think he was hurt and for a while did not talk to me. Just recently he kicked his girlfriend out of the house and then he started talking to me. Afterwards , he got into some trouble with the law. He gave me his house keys, told me to live in his house, he gave me his car keys (the ex-girlfriend got nothing). Here is the catch he also asked me to bail him out (which the bail is extremely ridiculously high). I am not going to bail him out; so I aint worried about that. He..... on his own has been telling me for the last year and a half how much he does not like her and does not want to be with her….the catch is since I did not bail him out he acts as if he does not want to visit with me when I go see him at the jail. His behavior is always up and down even when he was not incarcerated. Hes moody to say the least but always calls me his angel. People say he is really in love with me and is hurt that I continue to reject him. Others think he is trying to use me…………….. I don’t know what to think. He trusts me with everything! But he is sometimes mean to me…..I need advice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rosephase Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 How is giving you his house and car trying to use you? Or do they think he's just in it for the bail money you aren't giving him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timahani Posted June 8, 2012 Author Share Posted June 8, 2012 i dunno what to think that is why I am posting here. Sometimes people will give you access to their items while incarcerated because it is some sort of Collateral...like here....I trust you.....He told me I could have anything he owns.... ..that all he wants is for me to...."Get him out" (which I am not), but I did help him in other practical ways. On the opposite hand I do feel he cares somewhat because, I am the God mother of his children...he asked me if I would fulfill that role for him a long time ago...and I am very close with his kids and family prior to incarceration...so that is why I am confused....I have known him since he was like 6 years old.... I dunno if that helps....I just need to be really careful with my heart that is why I am posting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 So you live in his house rent free but won't help him out with the bail? Does he own the house? If he does, he could put that up as collateral. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abitbroken Posted June 8, 2012 Share Posted June 8, 2012 I would walk away and give his keys to someone he designates like a parent or sibling or give them back to him if he is allowed to have them. It doesn't matter if he has a crush or not - he is using you. He is putting you up so you will bail him out and he has also badmouthed his gf so you'd feel sorry for him/thinks he is a poor sweet man dating a shrew. You'll be talked about as the shrew when you don't give him what he wants. He also might think you'll sleep with him. And why would you be interested in someone who is in trouble with the law, and on the rebound to boot? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timahani Posted June 9, 2012 Author Share Posted June 9, 2012 Hey Everyone, Thanks for the advice I appreciate it. Just to answer a few of your question. One........ he is a good friend of the family...my grandmother has kept all of his children for many years....she has a huge daycare in this neighborhood, and has kept so many children that when people get into trouble it is very common for them to ask her /myself for help. Just for clarification purposes: * I told him from the beginning I would not bail him out. I do not send money to prison for anyone. I did however: *inform his relatives that he was locked up, gave his house keys and car keys to his little brother, and put his money that he possesed in his home on his books. ( I only decided to take the food and keys to the house when I realized that his dog and puppy was locked in a house for a week without food/water.... I would have felt horrible if the dogs had died). * The visits were necessary to let him know what was done and who had possession of his items. In terms, of his girlfriend, bond money....I dont understand why he keeps talking to me about those things...they really arent my concern.....My family has helped this boy and his children so much. I am just wondering does he want help? or is he just trying to use me????????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timahani Posted June 9, 2012 Author Share Posted June 9, 2012 @DN: It is not his home, he is just renting it. He asked me to stay there, but just to inform you. I have my own place, my own car etc....thanks though for the inquiry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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