jmp123067 Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 Hi Everyone- I'm new to this forum. Long Story short-- I've been with this guy for 4 months. During this time, we've broken up 3 times. THe last time was 5 days ago. The reason for our break ups, was he was just divorced (as in weeks). He was separated when we started dating, and the divorce was final a few weeks ago. The reason we've broken up is due to his confusion about his life and the state he was in (he also lost his job last year and has been unemployed with way too much time on his hands to "think"). He continually tells me I deserve better, he needs to get his life together to be worthy of me. I never put pressure on him, letting him know i was willing to wait this out with him in "limbo". He knows I want a relationship (I've never been married), but I used to tell him, I'm not pressuring you for marriage- I dont even know if you're who I am supposed to marry, we're still in the process of being in a relationship. He had his most recent "freak out" about our relationship, saying he's not ready for another relationship, doesn't know if he even wants to be married, and this isn't fair to me. So I said -then we need to end this. I'm devastated. I miss him terribly. Today he texted me he wants me to leave some of the "stuff" of his he left at my place outside my door for him to pick up. One of his texts the day we broke up was "i need to get my life together to be the man you deserve". I dont know what to do. I am trying "no contact" to see if he misses me and wants to man up and be with me again, but I also don't want to not show him I support him and am here for him. I dont know if it's fair for me to 'wait' for him.... but we're not really talking about anything the past few days. I hadn't heard from him for 2 days when he sent me the text today about wanting to get his stuff. Please help me. I want to do the right thing to see if we can be together -is it leave him alone, but let him know I'm still here for him? Ignore him and let him get his life together a little bit? Please help. I'm lost and so upset.... Link to comment
DrKitten Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 Cut your losses. This is way too much baggage after dating only four months. Even if he wanted to date you again, do you really believe he won't freak out and split again in another month or so? Link to comment
TriColors Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 This may be harsh but, this guy just got divorced and he's broken up with you three times in the past four months. Doesn't this all scream red flag to you? Link to comment
HesitantNow Posted February 25, 2012 Share Posted February 25, 2012 This may be harsh but, this guy just got divorced and he's broken up with you three times in the past four months. Doesn't this all scream red flag to you? And to be fair to the guy, he's tried getting that accross. He seems like he really does like you but a divorce will take a huge toll on him in many ways. He knows he isn't ready for a relationship, the best you can do is let him heal. Link to comment
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