shaneensmith Posted February 23, 2012 Share Posted February 23, 2012 Hello everyone, this is a first for me to be on here . . . I am just so sad, it's 9:13 PM and I have no one to talk to at this time of night, and I don't like bothering my mother anymore about my relationship problems, she's great to talk too but I think it brings her down and I swore to myself I would not bring her into it anymore. I've been with my husband for 5 years, 2 of which we are married. I am 29 and he is 32. I am very ambitious, and I am definitely an overachiever. My husband seems to be a: procrastinator, and he cannot deal with regular important daily life stuff, like calling his 7 year old daughter (from his previous marriage). He NEVER calls her, and when I ask him if he has talked to his daughter lately he gets really mad and says I am nagging him? I don't get it. Then follows an argument, because I hate when he calls me a nagg. When I first met him, I fell in love with him right away we got along really well. He was a drinker, but he just seemed lost (he was having a hard time, had just lost his mother to brain cancer). He was 27 had no licence, no grade 12, no job, no car, no secondary education, and in the 5 years we have been together, he now has a full driving licence, his grade 12, his second year automotive certification. I have PUSHED him to do all of this, I have spent COUNTLESS HOURS looking for jobs for him, designing his resume, SENDING his resumes, faxing emailing . . . omg, you have no idea. I have sat back and watched him, he procrastinates. And if I don't remind him or mention anything to him, he would have never done it on his own. He always says to me "quite NAGGING ME!" then I get super upset and mad and tell him that if it wasn't for me pushing him he would have never made the moves to do better. I am now tired, and don't want to help him anymore, I am tired, and I believe I have turned into a nagg. My husband is a very depressed person, when your around him, you can feel his depression, his lack of ambition. It's really rubbing off on me, and I had to start taking anti-depressants because I thought maybe I was loosing myself, they have helped, but I am starting to think maybe I am not happy because of my husbands lack of effort and his severe depression. Am I falling out of love with him? is it wrong of me to just want to GO! run away, I don't want to deal with the heartache, i just feel so sad, and sick of arguing and being called a nagg. My husband is a good man, he is very nice, very good to me. Even though he doesn't help around the house at all, doesn't offer cook or do the dishes, has never bought me flowers. I work FULL-TIME + I own my own business (so I am very very very busy), he works part time as a cook, yet I find I am still doing everything for both of us, and everything at home (cooking cleaning, organizing, reminding, etc . . . ) I want him to look after me for once . . . I am getting tired. What is everyone else's take on this? I really really need help. thank you everyone : ( Link to comment
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