Confusion!

[liverpoolboy]

Hi everyone i am finished with my girl friend about 6 or 7 weeks now. The breakup wasn't pleasant i think it came from a loss of interest and constant fighting. Towards the end of our relationship we were barley communicating.she dumped me and i was fine with it at the star as i didn't feel the same about her as i once did. Anyway through out the 7 weeks we had some communication around the fourth week we met up and spent 2 nights together, were she told me how much she loved me and was really showing her affection. Only for her to be completely different the next day and tell me she cant give me what i want .Which was very confusing. As she went from loving me to not wanting me. I feel this is because maybe i was giving her too much too quickly maybe a bit of doormat syndrome but i didn't make a fool of myself but she was the one in control. Anyway we talked about 2 days ago and ended things on a good note i told her i still cared about her and she wished me the best with everything and sent me a really nice message.

 

I have decided now to go no contact so i can move on with my life and improve as a person. I have a inner conflict going i think. I get moment in the day were i feel fine about things i feel moving forward is good and i feel happy about what im doing and excited about life. And i feel like im finally starting to get over my ex

 

Then on the other hand i get moments where i keep thinking about my ex and that she dosent care and more and we'll never speak again and all sorts of things.

And its very confusing can any one offer me some advice because im not really sure what im feeling right now.

 

Im trying to stay mentally strong and i feel good parts of the day then others i dont?

[digdug]

Your feelings are very normal. We've all been through those thoughts, and it doesn't matter if you are the dumper or dumpee. You need to allow yourself this time. You will transition into anger at some point as well. You'll be angry that you keep thinking about things, and angry because you'll think she isn't going through the same emotions.

 

The only way you'll make it through is if you can find peace within yourself. Understand that you did everything you could have. Sometimes two people just drift apart, and that is ok. Try to look back at mistakes you made .. not to beat yourself up, but to learn from them. As you learn more about yourself, you'll slowly come to that center ... or the peace I spoke about. You need to be comfortable within yourself before you can move on.

 

Take your time, and let the emotions run their course. There is no magical remedy unfortunately. Everyone deals with these things differently.

 

You'll find comfort here on ENA but you need to take whatever information you receive with a grain of salt. Gather as much info as you can, then apply it to yourself. Don't fall into the trap of doing exactly as one says on here you will fail. You need to do what is best for you, and no one knows that person more than you.

 

Good luck

~dig