ilystra Posted February 21, 2012 Share Posted February 21, 2012 Hi Everyone, Was hoping to find some new suggestions on how to regain trust. I'll fill you in on the situation. I will warn that it is a bit lengthy and I apologize. My BF and I have been dating for nearly 5 years now. A year and a half ago, I took some medication which threw me into a severe depression. Depression is a very difficult disease to deal with. I was moody. Typically I was negative about situations. I didn't want to go out. Just wanted to sleep or isolate myself further. During this time, he and I became very distant. He started hanging out with people I didn't know on a weekly basis, would sleep out a lot and would tell me how amazing all these people were. At most given times, I would have no idea where he was, what he was doing or who he was with. He ended up flirting with one of the women. He says it wasn't flirting as he had no intent of doing anything but it still happened. And I question whether or not there was intent on his behalf. There was on hers as he told me he had to make it clear to her that he had a girlfriend at one point. We were also not communicating. I found out later on that he had confided in another woman (not the same one he flirted with) about how he was feeling about our relationship, divulging very sensitive information to her about myself and portrayed me in a negative light but never once said anything negative about the role he was playing or what he was doing. He was also treating me fairly badly at this point. When I would try to talk with him about our relationship, he would snap at me or hang up the phone. I was also not getting any support from him. There was a lot wrong and went on for over a year. So here we are now, still trying to fix things. We've read a bunch of stuff, have tried seeing each other more, tried communicating more but it doesn't seem to be helping. I am still feeling betrayed and resentful by the commitment violations. I am at the point where things have to get better or I can't stay any more. I love him and want to spend my life with him but need things to improve. Any suggestions would certainly help!! Link to comment
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