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It's been 4 months


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And I'm still not over it....I'm seeing someone new who treats me really well but I've been in the dumps emotionally....I drunk call the ex on a weekly basis...I think about him every second of every day....He did me so wrong but I can't get over him....I started to do better but now I'm just going downhill again.

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It's really not a good idea to get into another relationship if you're still hung up on an ex.


Consider being alone for a good amount of time so you can come accross self-happiness before committing to another guy.


Also, I'd delete the ex's number, Facebook, Twitter, etc. and really start going No Contact so you can start living your life again.

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U keep being in this state of mind , becuase u keep dwelling on it on a daily .. u have to accept it and let it go.. it will hurt for a while, but eventually the pain will go away and life will move on..


But dwelling just opens the wound every single day.. and also how unfair it is for the person ur seeing now

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I am so sorry that your ex has there hooks in you. But if u have someone who treats u right and an ex who rejected u (thats what this need to contact again is really about) try to delete the exs number. Give this new person a chance or stay single. That way u wont hurt someone like u have been hurt!

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If you continue, you will be dealing with the loss and pain of 2 relationships ending very soon....the new person will realize you are still hung up on the ex and most likely leave to preserve his/her own dignity and self respect.


You are not ready for that type of commitment yet...its obvious by what you wrote her in a few short sentences that your ex still controls your emotions and thoughts.



You have to go No Contact...drunk dialing, Facebook, all of it....STOP TODAY.


We all slide back - I just posted LAST NIGHT that I was contemplating breaking my 40+ day No Contact.....and I got a reality check from the good people here.


Have you considered talking to a counselor?

4 months in you shouldn't still be contacting him or thinking about him every second of the day....it's not a sign of weakness to ask for help, actually quite the opposite...its a sign of strength.

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I blocked him on FB....As far as deleting his number, I know it by heart....I try to go NC for as long as possible and I was doing really good for about a month but than he'd text me or call me, now he says I'm the reason his life sucks and he wishes he never met me....so he's going NC but than I drink a bit too much and end up calling him.

I wasn't planning on getting into another relationship but the guy I'm seeing now is just too amazing to pass up the opportunity of being with. But he lives 70 miles away and I work a lot so I only get to see him once a week...so when I become an emotional wreck after drinking I end up calling the ex....not to say I miss him or anything but to cry about all the things that are on my mind....ugh. I'm a mess...lol

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Well your behaviour shows your still hung up on your ex big time. Its really not fair to the new guy that your hung up on your past whilst trying to forge something with him. Its a very toxic place to be and mindset to have to be not over the past and trying to have a new partner. As others have said you shoul finish that relationship and find peace on your own first. Purge your heart and mind of the ex and then move on to something new when you are HONESTLY ready.

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Focus on ex's bad points. Remember the pain he put you thru'. You can get over him if you choose to move on and not think about him. You need affirmations to call on every time you think of him. eg. I choose to let go. I am moving forward. I accept it is the right thing to do , to get over him; every day in every way i am getting better at being without him....etc....

Visualise enjoying life without him.

It is very hard. Believe me I know. And every time you contact him it sets you back 100fold.

You can do it. You have to. Have faith you will feel joy again and another door will open for you.

Draw on all sources of help. Counselling, books, support groups like here. Use this opportunity to re-invent yourself and be who you want to be.

Do you really want to be a victim of a broken heart or someone strong who moves on?

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