sandrawg Posted February 18, 2012 Share Posted February 18, 2012 It's funny, because while I do feel good that i got that response email from my ex, explaining better where his head was at, it didn't really shed any new light on the breakup. When he walked away from me, I kind of knew he was just an emotionally confused mess. To be honest, I sort of knew it, going INTO the relationship. That's where I need to look at my own issues. Seriously, you guys who are all clamouring for closure..do you really want closure? Or are you just craving breadcrumbs from your ex? He basically admitted that he was making a choice to be selfish, and have his own stupid superficial, flirt-with-girls-at-the-bar social life...being willing to toss me out and not even give our relationship a chance, in exchange for something a lot less meaningful. I came to the conclusion that my ex was so back and forth about our relationship...one minute falling in love with me, the next, flirting with other girls..I am definitely better off without him. I'm glad that, since he wasn't sure about his feelings for me, he walked away. Now I can find someone who will be sure. Life is all about priorities and trade-offs. Those of you who were dumped..don't you think if someone is willing to make the trade-off that results in tossing you out of the other person's life...is that person REALLY worthy of your time, love, and resources??? And if they come back, how can you trust that they've seen the error of their ways and will actually appreciate you, and do whatever it takes to make things work, in the future? I tend to think, that rejection is going to stay with you and haunt you, even if you try again. I had a rel'ship where we tried about 10 times back and forth in 4 yrs. I now look at those 4 yrs as a giant waste of time. I guess what I'm saying is...so many people consider relationships disposable. Most of us are better off, chalking our experiences as dumpees off to "lessons learned" and moving on, once we've had time to grieve, instead of holding onto hope of jumping onto a train that's already left the station. ANd hopefully, next time, we'll be more careful and find someone who isn't so willing to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Link to comment
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