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Facebook and St-Valentin's day


Alezia

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Yeah, I guess this is the case of thinking a problem is due to something, but in the end it's something else completely. I think it's just easier to observe on these specific days or commercialized holiday moments. You sort of end up annoyed at those select fews, that it ruins the rest of the pictures for the rest of them.

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Okay, the pizza picture from your first post made me laugh. I wouldn't mind seeing that in my FB feed because it's not your typical V-Day gift. Possibly more unique and personal.

 

But on the rest of it, I agree with you. I only glanced at FB for like 5 seconds today before rolling my eyes and closing the window. I do get an overtly "Look at me!" vibe from Valentine's gift pictures that I don't get from normal, every day stuff posted on there. It's weird to me because it's like saying "Look what he got me! He's so thoughtful and I'm so special!" when all the chocolate boxes and flowers are essentially the same, and takes less than 5 minutes in a grocery store to buy.

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I am not bothered by people posting their gifts on any day, I actually like seeing the small gestures. I find it sad that people must always think about what they should be posting on their own facebook because someone on their friend list might not like it in their feed - this is very simple, remove that person from your feed or de-friend them. I recently posted a bunch of my shoes and handbags on facebook because it was on my sisters iPhone and the easiest way was to transfer them was through facebook as I was in a rush, some of my friends might think I was showing off, but if they are true and real friends they would know me better than that and would know that either I just posted it because I wanted to (my facebook) or to show someone or because I love really nice shoes and handbags, because I might use the album as a form of temporary backup or simply that I love pictures like that and enjoy seeing peoples clothes, accessories and plenty of my friends do too.

It's really no different than saying you went out to dinner with your partner and he got you a rose and paid for dinner, had them make breakfast, or showing a picture of your new car, new hairstyle, clothing, nose job, boob job, glasses, newly toned abs, really anything. One of my good friends is a fitness model/personal trainer/ she regularly posts pictures of her competitions, success and her amazing body, particularly abs, she has put a ton of work into her body, and she is damn proud of it. I'm sure some women might think "oh gosh - not another picture of her abs" but, who cares? Her facebook so she should be able to post what she wants. What I do find unnecessary is the posting of your friends gifts on here, that's unfair. They posted these gifts on their facebook and some if not all would probably feel betrayed that their friend decided to post their private pictures on a forum - I know I'd be really angry if someone did that with any of my pictures.

 

PS: I don't mean to come accross as preachy - because I actually like you, Alezia, - just my two cents.

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Nahn, no worries petite. As I posted earlier, it was someone in specific general's attitude which reflected back onto facebook which I didn't actually like - there was things posted along with the pictures that was somewhat disturbing but for which I didn't repeat here. But it took me a bit of time to realize it, and it sort of ruined the holiday for the rest of the bunch that posted their pictures too.

And I said earlier, the usual accomplisments such as abs, weight loss, shoes or handbags don't bother me at all if they are genuine about being proud about the accomplishment. This person was specifically trying to making someone emotional and angry (which isn't me). There was just something about this particular holiday that made me feel awkward because of that particular person. Just couldn't figure it out, but yes I did un-friend them in specific, as I thought it was crass behaviour.

 

The pictures are public on facebook - so I take their attitude towards sharing in reflected in privacy settingsas they have pretty much consented to facebook (they will be on google after all). Plus, they are just things after all - objects don't need to sign a waiver form of consent. You are actually the only person I've ever seen express such views if it doesn't involve their 'actual being' (but no one can recognize them directly through an object, so they don't care) - but I can see how people may have different views on this.

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I can understand your point of view, but people have the right to post what they will on their own facebook. I know some of my friends have ex's with whom they are still friends, and they do what is best for themselves - sometimes this might seem selfish and unfair, but can't always live life worrying what others might think or like. I can understand why some people might think it's bragging, I personally don't - some people post birthday cards, vacation pictures maybe that is bragging too in the eyes of others. I suppose I think that people who are jealous are the ones that have an issue with such things - and I am definitely not saying that you Alezia are jealous, I genuinely believe you are not and that's not the reason why you posted this thread at all.

I was/am under the impression that even if the facebook album is public the pictures do not appear in google searches, but that friends, friends of friends, and other people who might search for Jane Smith on facebook would be able to see Album X. I guess for me, even if the photos are "public" on that persons facebook, I wouldn't feel right posting it on a forum, that's just me, and of course everyone can do as they wish, but I know I wouldn't like it and I believe there are others who wouldn't.

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They do not index all public photos specifically, but I would warn against keeping your photos public if you don't want them seen by the whole world. I definitely had google link some of my public pictures, and profile pictures. It's fine to go under the assumption that you wouldn't like it if X or Y would post a picture on a forum, but I would still advise against it if you really want to keep your pictures private.

 

The thing that was particular about this situation (I didn't post this person in question's photo) is that they have a brand new girlfriend (the ex and the guy are friends). And I think the guy basically spit out this ex-girl's fantasy out to the new girl for St-Valentin's day. It seemed like it was done in such a deliberate manner to piss her off, like the entire photo album and experience was staged in how she would have liked it. Let's say that your wish for that upcoming St-Valentin's day was to go shopping, then the spa, then go for sushi, and end the night at a particular bar. And your ex-boyfriend did this exact sequence with the new girl in a very specific 'spiteful' way. It's possibly not bragging, but I didn't find it particularly tasteful. There was definetly some ulterior motive than 'living his own life and being proud of it'.

 

And I think most people when they say it is not considered bragging refer to the genuine sharing of pictures.

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There are people that perhaps don't even know how to set things too privately - my mother is one example, my sister had to help her. Technicalities of public facebook pictures aside, I still would not post even public pictures of my friends that were posted on their facebook. I take access to peoples facebook pretty seriously and would not breach any line which I too would expect them to not breach with me - mutual respect with friends, and they are not my pictures to post.

 

People do mean things to ex's and love interests, it's life, if they can't handle what the ex is doing they shouldn't have them as a friend on facebook in the first place or even be friends with an ex. I still don't agree with you posting those pictures here. Your prerogative of course, but I know I'd be pretty angry if someone did it to me, I find it less tasteful posting someone elses facebook pictures on a forum than posting your valentines day pictures on your own facebook.

 

That's really the first time I've heard of facebook photos from albums appearing on google. I know if you search for X their profile picture shows up on google under their name and if you view their profile if they have public photos you can see them, but never actual pictures from albums. Also I believe you need to be logged in to see facebook profiles, public or not. I am not arguing facebook's privacy laws on public photos, I am talking on a more personal level of mutual respect between people we as individuals have on our facebooks, the access they give us to their profiles - there needs to be some form of respect for their pictures.

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Anyways, thanks for all the opinions - problem resolved. Petite, as I've said before, the people I've posted the pictures of have no issues with it. I haven't tricked anyone who was 'computer dumb', and it's people who I've had these types of discussions with before.

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Yeah, they don't mind as long as it's not a picture of their face or body, or anything that could make them easily identifiable (ID, special car etc...). Obviously I haven't consulted with every single person on my friend list, but the ones I know of I will sometimes use.

 

Haha! He's good to sit through that. He should be grateful that you only rented it

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