Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Is it simply my unique experience to come and Facebook and get flooded with pictures of everyone's romantic gifts and suppers? This is just not one person, but the majority of my female friends - which totals up to around 50 people putting pictures of roses, chocolates, romantic notes, stuffed animals, deserts, cakes etc... Does not this strike anyone as a little weird? I definetly have had relationships for a long time, and while I don't really celebrate St-V in the traditional way, I don't remember having this sheer amount of people make 'bragging' posts? I know a lot of my friends are coming into new relationships so I can appreciate that, but I have a lot of friends in much older relationships (10years+) who are also making these awkard braging posts. What gives? Anyways, I can only attach up to 5 files - but this is just a preview of what was on my facebook feed today, and which does not directly identify any of my friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 It's a different world nowadays - with Twitter and Facebook it takes a couple of seconds to snap a picture and upload it to either. I know I don't post pictures of the gifts my husband gives me in a bragging way (because I have single friends and I know how that can come accross) but I do like to share what he has given me. It's no different than your girlfriends TELLING you what their SO's got them for Valentine's Day around the water cooler - it's just done in a different way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah, I suppose it wouldn't be so bad if I asked them what they received from their SO. There are some people which I am genuinely interested in hearing. Others, I couldn't care less. It's simply the fact that once you open facebook, it's all you see that I find creepy!!! I certainly didn't upload any of my personal pics, I just find it slightly odd. And it's totally not a jealousy thing, I received a gift from my S.O. which is a bit less traditional (Mario Bros action figures for my office), but I didn't have any urges to share it with the world. Ok perhaps for the sake of this post to prove that I am not jealous - but I didn't share this with anyone else outside of the thread. I even have one girl kissing her monitor to a pic of her boyfriend!!!! Ok, I will stop posting them... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 hahaha - it may be a privacy thing Alezia. I mean, not everyone is comfortable with sharing their whole lives - some don't even have facebook or only have facebook and post no personal pictures of themselves, etc. - while others have no problem with sharing their lives. I think that's the 'urge' not to share it may come up with you, you just don't see the point in sharing it. And, btw, that's an awesome V-day gift. L bought me 2 DVDs - and I shared them, lol - but I know what you mean in a way. I don't like the pressure this day puts on men and so I find myself annoyed with pictures from friend's of flowers and chocolates and such (the A-typical V-Day gifts) whereas I would rather he NOT buy my flowers on today because of how outrageous the price can get. But I'm projecting, lol I think in some ways it's much like the e-ring thing - MOST women don't post pictures of their's or show you their ring in person in a 'ha,ha I have this and you don't' kind of way, it's just being super happy about something you were given and wanting to share that with the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah, I think we're sort of going along the same line of thought. But I've always been a very atypical girl, so I wasn't sure if I'd find people anyone with the same perspective. I can appreciate a picture of a beautiful bouquet above (and probably would appreciate it if it was the only picture), but seriously - those 'wrapped' cake and chocolate and notes pictures... very very strange to me. You can't even read it.. it's just like a random piece of paper that's pictured. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Maybe it's your definition of a present that's making it strange? And I agree with it - Valentine's Day for me is not about chocolates and flowers and jewlery - I don't want any of that on today because there are other days in the year for that (and were they aren't ridiculously expensive!), I'd prefer a more practical gift, something none traditional. Which is why I think the flower pictures ON V-day annoys me so much... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah I don't know, I just feel like flowers are still always a classy gift if it's a nice bouquet even though it's overdone and overpriced. I agree not original, or exciting but still nice to receive. That one on the second post just looks tacky - but yes perhaps I am just more picky in what I consider a nice gift?! And I'd seriously post the pictures of the girl's play-by-picture 'date' post, or the other one who's kissing the screen of her computer during her 'webcam date' with her Long distance boyfriend 'having dinner with her wine of glass' as they are hilarious - but I suppose I need to respect their privacy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 I suppose I should just count myself lucky that no one has posted lingerie shots:shame: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Flowers are def a classy gift - I mean, L sent me a bouquet about a week or 2 before Valentine's day but I don't like your a typical flower, my favorite flower is a Daisy. I'm pretty picky myself, lol lol! I can KIND of see the LD one - being in a LDR myself - BUT there is a fine line of going too far. I have taken a screen shot of L and I at NYE to post in our blog only because it's the only picture we had of that day. But it gos back to that level of comfort about sharing stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I suppose I should just count myself lucky that no one has posted lingerie shots hahahahahaha! This genuinely made me lol Alezia! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alwaysmoving Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I agree that it kinda seems like it's bragging. I'm a teacher and my students got me some cute stuff and I momentarily considered snapping a picture of those gifts (a mug with candy in it, a teddy bear, a "you're an awesome teacher" box of chocolate, etc) but thought nah, what's the point. Like you though my news feed was covered in all the pictures of gifts girls got. I'm friends with a ton of girls who just got engaged or are in new relationships and I get that they're all excited, but for me (single) I kinda thought "shut up" lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PlayingAces Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 You should be happy for your friends and family who are celebrating with their loved ones. I definitely am a Valentines Day-aholic, not just with my husband, but with my close friends and family. It's a day to celebrate everyone who means a lot to you. There's nothing wrong with sharing good things that happen in your life, that's what facebook is all about, or should be all about. If someone was posting negative things, wouldn't you be just as annoyed? I really have a hard time with people who complain about what others post - if you don't care for it, delete them. Otherwise, forget about it and move on. When people make comments like that, it makes me think they're jealous. Just my two cents! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 It would probably have been the lesser of evils of pictures today I don't think it's something in the debate of single vs. taken, as student gifts would probably have been one of the better pictures to make my list... I know this will be a total non-issue tomorrow - so I suppose I must just live with it today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 You should be happy for your friends and family who are celebrating with their loved ones. I definitely am a Valentines Day-aholic, not just with my husband, but with my close friends and family. It's a day to celebrate everyone who means a lot to you. There's nothing wrong with sharing good things that happen in your life, that's what facebook is all about, or should be all about. If someone was posting negative things, wouldn't you be just as annoyed? I really have a hard time with people who complain about what others post - if you don't care for it, delete them. Otherwise, forget about it and move on. When people make comments like that, it makes me think they're jealous. Just my two cents! I'm not posting negative things about people. I think it's good that people are enjoying the day such as myself, I just don't know why people need to overshare details in a step by step fashion on this day. It's not so much about deleting their posts, rather than I am taken back at the mentality. What propels them to act in such a manner? I am trying to comment about this concept of this 'sharing' as a whole, which you seem to be missing - as opposed to wanting not to see the pictures and simply pressing 'delete'. As you seem to be of this mentality - Do you need to post an entire album of everything you did on this day? Wouldn't a simple "Happy St-Valentin's day everyone!" message suffice? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I had the same thoughts today Alezia. My facebook news feed was flooded with people taking pictures of the flowers they got, etc etc ... I think it's inappropriate - no need to "brag" about your flowers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 This is a sample of one person's St-Valentin's day album... I am still limited to 5 pictures - but can imagine the rest of the multi course dinner and other "home made cards" and the like. The comments that went along with the pictures were also quite excessive... Is this really "sharing the joy", or right down to "relationship promotion/bragging"? The people themselves are nice, but I am wondering if my friends are not a tad excessive materialistic and 'self-conscious'... Though if this is a common thing, maybe it's just something I need to put up with. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 What about posting pictures of gifts constitutes it as 'bragging'? Bragging is such a subjective term - some could think people who can take expensive vacations are bragging by posting their vacation pictures or people who can't have children could view a new mother posting adorable pictures of her newborn as bragging - obviously neither of those people are 'bragging' about what they have done/doing. I see no difference in those and someone posting a picture of a bouquet of flowers their SO gave them - the only difference is that bouquet of flowers was probably given on a very comercialized holiday. When someone gives their wife flowers say, in June, is it seen as bragging as well? When you buy a new car is it bragging to post pictures of it? When you buy a new pair of shoes, is it bragging? Of course not - it's only seen as bragging because the pictures are posted on a certain day of the year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think it's the entire ALBUM of photos that is rather disturbing in combination of what the holiday represents. Why do no one go out of their way to demonstrate how their SO loves them by creating entire albums during the rest of the year? I mean, most people don't put albums of every single present they have received on Christmas day. Yet, they do it for St-Valentin's day. It's fine to put one picture of something memorable or exciting, but there is something that just seems off about it. I can't quite put my finger on it. I don't see babies or family as things to brag about in a materialistic sense, so I agree that it doesn't bother me. I've always seen family and family ties as something neutral. And even though it can be annoying to receive the 10th update about a grandfather who passed away 7 years ago in a week, I can understand those things better. Actual tangible accomplishments like weight loss, successfully completed a marathon, got some kind of medal - all great! super! As far as vacations, I'm sort of on the edge about this one too. Some people simply put up the pictures, and it's fine. While other people's comments just make me feel very weird... you know the people that keep putting X days until vacation repetiviely starting from 150 days. Then they keep updating their status about how lucky they are to travel to X, then Y, then Z. And omg, soon it will be BB too! I guess for some people, the posts and pictures seem more 'staged' than a genuine need to share pictures. I don't know if it has something to do with my set of friends. For some people, there seems to be an ulterior motive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think it's the entire ALBUM of photos that is rather disturbing in combination of what the holiday represents. Why do no one go out of their way to demonstrate how their SO loves them by creating entire albums during the rest of the year? I mean, most people don't put albums of every single present they have received on Christmas day. Yet, they do it for St-Valentin's day. It's fine to put one picture of something memorable or exciting, but there is something that just seems off about it. I can't quite put my finger one it. No, I agree with you on the whole album thing - the only holiday I create a whole album for is Christmas. But again, maybe that's their thing? I scrapbook so for me I'll make a whole album about something that most would think is mundane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think I've put my finger on it. It's that most of the pictures are not of people enjoying the moment and celebrating the holiday. You know - herself unwrapping the gifts, or anything like you would for Christmas. Everything in the albums is focused on the items, the luxury and stuff - that it sort of takes the whole purpose of the holiday away. It just makes it like "oh, look what I spent on her", or "look what he spent on me". I don't really need the ten angles of the chocolate bar he gave you. There is no nice scenic pictures of what people did together or saw. The human factor is lost. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think I've put my finger on it. It's that most of the pictures are not of people enjoying the moment and celebrating the holiday. You know - herself unwrapping the gifts, or anything like you would for Christmas. Everything in the albums is focused on the items, the luxury and stuff - that it sort of takes the whole purpose of the holiday away. It just makes it like "oh, look what I spent on her", or "look what he spent on me". I don't really need the ten angles of the chocolate bar he gave you. There is no nice scenic pictures of what people did together or saw. The human factor is lost. I can understand that - but I guess it's the scrapbooker in me, I myself tend to always take these kinds of pictures as well of objects, stuff given... I think there should still be a human factor, most def, and I suppose when there are no pictures with the human factor it can be portrayed as 'braggy' - but it's still a subjective term. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah, I am not a scrap booker myself. And I think it's fine if it's in your personal collection, or if I had requested to see your scrapbook. It's sort of something I would not mind seeing in a personal setting or if you were super close to me. Some of the people I have on facebook are people I keep in touch on an occasional basis... like one or twice per year. I think it's definitely a weird gray area for me. I'm curious as to what you would consider bragging? Perhaps a better wording would be - awkward? staged? too much information? concerned with appearances? Slightly hard to describe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Yeah, I am not a scrap booker myself. And I think it's fine if it's in your personal collection, or if I had requested to see your scrapbook. It's sort of something I would not mind seeing in a personal setting. I think it's definitely a weird gray area for me. I'm curious as to what you would consider bragging? But again, in this day in age, it all goes to facebook or twitter. I myself post all pictures I want to scrapbook in a certain 'theme' in an album on facebook before I save them to my own computer. granted most of what I scrapbook is my niece and nephew but I'm sure there are some people that would wish I would stop posting pictures of those adorable rascals, lol. I honestly wouldn't consider any picture posting as bragging - maybe because I'm one of those who has no problem sharing her life - I don't know, but I just don't see picture sharing as bragging. And it would be very easy for me to see a new mother posting baby pictures up as bragging because that's something I want but can't have now - so I could easily say 'oh, she's bragging that's had a kid and I haven't' but the fact is, she's living her life. She's sharing a part of her life she wants to and is no way personally signaling me out and saying my happiness trumps yours. I think it's super easy for people to feel signaled out or that people are bragging on Valentine's day - it's a commercialized holiday made to put men under pressure and single people to feel bad about themselves, and neither should be done. Even status updates and everything I don't see as bragging - because that's the age of today, sharing your life with your friends. I think if you see something as bragging then there is something about you yourself that is causing you to see it as such - inner jealousy, envy, annoyance at it - whatever it may be. My first thought when I post a picture of a bouquet of flowers L has sent me isn't 'look at my amazing husband and what he did!' it's - 'I want to remember the day he sent me flowers and I want to share that wit my closest friends and family'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alezia Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 That's the problem, it would be rather easy for me to chuck it to jealousy if I could. I can't relate it to jealousy as usually I am either doing the same thing, or going with them. Sometimes, the posts I even find embarrassing if I am going with them!!!! There are moments in the past where I was jealous for things I wanted, but these are definitely more of a feeling of annoyance than desire. I'm doing the whole travels myself, so nothing there. And it's not annoyance in the same of the pictures of "I'm tired of seeing the 100th picture of your kid". I don't really think it's the experience itself, it's the manner in which it's done that bothers me most. Some people, I find it's completely ok - family pictures, gifts, vacations etc... I guess it's just a cryptic personality thing again. I think some of my friends are too concerned with their appearances and how they are perceived. It sort of trickles on FB through these posts and pictures. It's not really about living their life anymore, and I think that's the part that is disturbing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OptomisticGirl Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 I think if they are concerned with their appearances and how they are percieved OUTSIDE facebook then yes, it will probably translate to that very same thing ON facebook. If I think someone IRL is an arrogant toad, more than likely I'm going to take every facebook status and picture posted as them being arrogant, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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