cmoneyeasy Posted February 12, 2012 Share Posted February 12, 2012 I feel lost. Literally right after we saw the vow last night we got in a fight. Keep in mind I'm 19 and shes 17, but we got out and her one friend was there with these 2 guys and their other friend, like a double date. this girl didnt want to go on this double date so my gf asked if she could come home with her and i said it was fine. now heres where i get pissed. her friend pulls her aside and leaves me standing in the middle of the mall for like 5 minutes and i felt dumb. so, the car ride back i was mostly silent and when she was getting out of the car i said "why are you acting like a * * * * * " and that was it. i called her and she was tore into me and was telling me she promised herself she'd never let anyone treat her like this etc etc and that we would talk later. she was also pissed bc i said that to her the night before. well, we talked about an hour ago and we decided to go on a week break. no talking, no texting, nothing. i'm suppose to call her next sunday at 2pm. this is gonna drive me insane. valentines day is tuesday but as for the conversation, it was just her saying she cant let herself be treated like that and then i made the suggestion of taking a week break and she seemed cool with it. now right now im having a horrible inner struggle bc i wanna call her and be like "listen, don't do this break for me. if you think we should break up i don't want you to do something you don't want to." idk i know its a long read but i really need some help with this Link to comment
cmoneyeasy Posted February 13, 2012 Author Share Posted February 13, 2012 someone help Link to comment
cmoneyeasy Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 someone please respond to this if i need to clarify something i will, or even retype this. this isnt getting easier. and i'm getting constant mixed signals and idk what they mean. Link to comment
Mike88 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 OK STOP YOURSELF BEFORE DOING ANYTHING. You seem kind of needy to me, don't take it personal, I made the same mistake myself. Don't get upset over her bratty behavior. Act like nothing can possibly bother you. DON'T call her Sunday, make it go on for longer. Her loss, her mistake. Don't contact her at all. She's playing games with you, so be the man and pass this test. Act like you don't need her and go have fun. The one who cares least in a relationship has the control, so give her a wake up call. WHEN she calls/txts you wondering whats up with you being so fine with this break, tell her it was actually a great idea and if she tries to make plans reschedule for another time more convenient for you, and turn your act around like your in the control and have the lead. This is all I got for ya... Good Luck. Edit: I hope you didn't reward her for this by getting her something for valentine's day. Link to comment
dumPI Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Let me rephrase the title of the thread: my girlfriend just decided to go on a break (up) and I agreed ... Help = assume she has already broken. If it's hard to assume: call her and break up yourself! Then NC and moving on. Link to comment
Lansing Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Well, I would say you are a bit of a jerk for calling her a "***".. I am guessing the word rhymes with "witch". Her friend pulled HER away, not the other way around. You do sound needy... I would say it was kind of rude for your gf (or ex-gf) to talk to her like that but it wasn't nice of you to react the way you did. It would have been better later that night with just to two of you there to say "hey, that was kind of awkward when you were talking to so/so without me" or whatever. Or, if you were standing in the middle of the mall tell your gf "hey, you guys can catch up, I am going to go in this store, find me when you are done" or whatever. I think that a "break" of not talking is pretty dumb. She obviously is worried you are going to keep treating her the way you are but not sure why she wants a "break". Maybe she has other reasons to break up with you and this is just her easy way out. Link to comment
cmoneyeasy Posted February 15, 2012 Author Share Posted February 15, 2012 i mean there's more to it. for the passed week i have been kind of a d***, and my buddy talked to her and she said she was heart broken bc she never thought id treat her this way. i broke the nc on monday to apologize and she told me shes just very hurt and is torn on what to do bc she promised herself she wouldnt let a guy treat her like that but i'm her "first love". the break was actually my idea. i think we were both getting a little sick of each other. she puts all over facebook how sad she is and i'm not doing much better. she completely b****ed out this girl that posted on my wall the other day too. and no, i didnt do anything for her on valetines day. in fact i went out with an old fling of mine. Link to comment
dazednconfuse Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 wow the fact that you are going out with an ex, well that just shows your girlfriend that you have moved on. you are pushing her away and she might not come back.. i think she agreed to the break because you suggested it. not for any other reason. if you guys can't get throught this fight than maybe its just not meant to be.. it would of taken a little romance and a sinscere apology to make things right. Link to comment
dazednconfuse Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 you did what you did to preserve your ego. but if she was worth it, you would look like a fool to win her back.. yes caring less gives you the power in a relationship but if you don't care at all then you loose that power. you need to find a balance! Link to comment
cmoneyeasy Posted February 16, 2012 Author Share Posted February 16, 2012 well we broke up, she called me and just told me she doesnt think its the time now bc she thinks i clearly have issues now, she called me a d-bag, started saying how shes gonna remember like that. when she misses me shes just gonna think about how much of a d*** i am. she told me i completely broke her heart, and shes texting me telling me shes so confused and she hates this. she said her heart wants to be with me but her head is telling her to leave bc of how i treated her. and she hopes we can be together in the future. i got fed up within like the first 2 mins of the phone call and i told her i cant take it anymore and shes not meant for me. and the last thing she texted was "im so confused and i told her she shouldve waited until sunday bc thatd be our break, she didnt respond so i said "look if you wanna talk we can, but im not gonna wait around", and im gonna leave it at that. shes a very emotional girl as you can tell. and i feel horrible bc its my fault. i really wanna work things out with her and i just dont know what to do at this point any advice would be wonderful, thank you guys so much Link to comment
cmoneyeasy Posted February 18, 2012 Author Share Posted February 18, 2012 I don't understand she deleted me off fb the day we broke up, she made some completely depressing statuses like "wow i never thought id be completely shattered like this, you said youd never break my heart" etc etc. but she broke up with me! she told me yesterday she thinks its best we shouldnt talk for awhile, but i told her thats gonna be hard. she was nice at first, but as the convo went on a little bit more she kept getting meaner. she came out and said she just doesnt think we should be together. and i mean i agree we shouldnt for now and stuff like that, but i dont get why shes being mean. i said to her, "i get it. your hearts with me but your head keeps telling you to leave. thats how i feel too." shes like "good." like why is she being like that? and what should i do? honestly, i dont know if i want her back but i really just wanna talk to her. what are some good ways to get the upper hand a little? please help me out here guys i'm begging you Link to comment
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