Cowboy1015 Posted February 8, 2012 Share Posted February 8, 2012 We've been broken up for 5 months now. We still talk. Last Friday, I had dinner with her and I told her that I still feel the same. But she said, she doesn't feel the same and that there's a lot of things that she didn't like about me. Like I made her feel that she's not doing enough. And that I lied to her about my age. I did not. In fact, she was the one who made herself younger. I am 10 yrs older, I just look really young. She said I'm not right for her that I should start dating others. And she just wanted to be friends. My mind says to forget her. And I know I can. But I guess this means I'm giving up after 5 months of being patient with her. I still have this feeling of wanting to continue talking to her and maybe she'll turn around. I don't know why I love this woman so much. The fact is, she has some major issues too and I'm being blind about it. Somebody needs to punch me in the head. Should I continue talking to her? Should I stop and forget her? Link to comment
digdug Posted February 8, 2012 Share Posted February 8, 2012 Where do you live? I'd be happy to oblige, lol Seriously, if she had given you no hope, you need to move on. We all have little things that we don't like about our partner, but the issue is are they deal breakers? In your case, I'm not sure that matters. It's hard to let go of hope. I have hope to, but I don't let it define me and the things I want for myself. Don't get me wrong, I struggle every single day, at some point. But, if she gives you no reason to hang on you owe it to yourself to move on. You can't make her turn around, none of us can. All we can do is do for ourselves. It sounds so simple, eh? Look at yourself, and define who you are, and who you want to be. Set those boundaries for what you are willing to accept in a partner and don't waver from it. You've hung on for a while now, and precious time is ticking away. Happiness waits for you, that I promise. But, you can't look forward and concentrate on what lie ahead if you are constantly looking in the rear view mirror. Harder said then done, I know. You can do it, we all can. We all deserve that chance at happiness but it starts one painful step forward at a time. Good luck to you ~dig Link to comment
dazednconfuse Posted February 8, 2012 Share Posted February 8, 2012 if you loved her as much as you say you do then you could handle being just friends with her... maybe so you can get over her, you should not see or talk to her until you loose those feelings for her than if you still want her in your life you could be friends... no contact is the best way to heal a broken heart, it won't bring her back but it will make you stronger and happy within yourself again. if it was meant to be and if she loved you, she would not of let you go. a person who truly loves you will never let you go, no matter what the situation is... Link to comment
Cowboy1015 Posted February 8, 2012 Author Share Posted February 8, 2012 I guess the fact that we still talk and hang out once gives me hope. But you're right I hang on too long and I don't regret it. At least I have peace of mind that I did my best. I just want these feelings for her to be gone. It's just a matter of time. Link to comment
Angel Irulan Posted February 8, 2012 Share Posted February 8, 2012 Sometimes you just can't be friends when your heart says it's not over for you. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 It's hard for the feelings to go away when you still hang out with her. Honestly, she's in her early 20s. She's probably wants a guy can grow up with and not for. Not saying that to hurt you, but just from her words. It seems you have long been more into her than vice versa. Time for you to find someone who loves you back. Link to comment
Cowboy1015 Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 if you loved her as much as you say you do then you could handle being just friends with her... maybe so you can get over her, you should not see or talk to her until you loose those feelings for her than if you still want her in your life you could be friends... no contact is the best way to heal a broken heart, it won't bring her back but it will make you stronger and happy within yourself again. if it was meant to be and if she loved you, she would not of let you go. a person who truly loves you will never let you go, no matter what the situation is... I really appreciate this reply. Somebody needs to tell me that she never really loved me. I think she never really did. I gave her bracelet once, and she said, now she has to get me something too. I don't care if she gives me something, but don't say you will. She never did until we broke up. In fact, I can't think of anything she did for me that shows she loved me. Link to comment
The_Seeker Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Sometimes you just can't be friends when your heart says it's not over for you. Totally agreed. It's better off not keeping you in your life until you really get over. In other words, you upgraded to someone way better and is WAY OVER the relationship that you both had. Link to comment
Cowboy1015 Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 It's hard for the feelings to go away when you still hang out with her. Honestly, she's in her early 20s. She's probably wants a guy can grow up with and not for. Not saying that to hurt you, but just from her words. It seems you have long been more into her than vice versa. Time for you to find someone who loves you back. Age are just numbers. She's mistaken me to be 10 years younger because I take care of myself. So she must be really immature if my age bothers her. There's a lot of other men in their late 20's who looks a lot older than me. I guess the bottom line is she just doesn't love me the same way I do. The only question is if I should continue hanging out with her. Link to comment
The_Seeker Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 Age are just numbers. She's mistaken me to be 10 years younger because I take care of myself. So she must be really immature if my age bothers her. There's a lot of other men in their late 20's who looks a lot older than me. I guess the bottom line is she just doesn't love me the same way I do. The only question is if I should continue hanging out with her. My boyfriend is 10 years older and he looks younger unlike guys my age. Anyway, I would say no because you're playing the hero complex. Link to comment
Cowboy1015 Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 Sometimes you just can't be friends when your heart says it's not over for you. Everytime I talk to her... I feel like I'm dying. I wanted to tell her I love her... but I can't. Link to comment
Doofus Posted February 9, 2012 Share Posted February 9, 2012 You can check my posts; I'm not a big fan of NC, especially how generally it's applied. But, in your particular case, it is warranted. You told her what you want and she, somewhat cruelly, rejected you. It's time to change things up. Disappear. I doubt you have much chance (most women in their early twenties are notoriously fickle - they can afford to be. Not many in western society are looking to marry at that age), but if you do, this is the only way to realize it. Link to comment
Cowboy1015 Posted February 9, 2012 Author Share Posted February 9, 2012 You can check my posts; I'm not a big fan of NC, especially how generally it's applied. But, in your particular case, it is warranted. You told her what you want and she, somewhat cruelly, rejected you. It's time to change things up. Disappear. I doubt you have much chance (most women in their early twenties are notoriously fickle - they can afford to be. Not many in western society are looking to marry at that age), but if you do, this is the only way to realize it. She is notoriously fickle. I will do my best to disappear. Thanks. Link to comment
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