How can I prevent myself from falling in love?

[Benji22]

I’ve been picking up an attitude about love for a while now… that basically tells me to experience it.. is to walk into an emotional trap. (for me at least) It just feels like not falling in love, no matter what the situation would be is not the right thing for me right now. Thing is, whenever I get to know somebody well enough while maintaining a sexual relationship… it just happens over time. I caught up with my feelings and tell myself things like “Loves worth a shot!”. However, at this point and time, like I said… its a bad idea for me. So, how do I prevent my hopeless-self from falling in love without having to sacrifice a sex life and without having one night stands?

[Generation]

That's kinda like asking how do I stop an apple from falling off a tree. It's really hard to do. Can't give the answer you're looking for because as far as I'm concerned, it's impossible. You can probably fool yourself into saying you're not in love, but deep down inside, you know the truth. That's why dumpers/dumpees like to demonize the other person when a break up occurs because it helps them move on. Deep down inside, they probably still retain some of those feelings, it fades but not immediately.

[OrangeMoon]

I’ve been picking up an attitude about love for a while now… that basically tells me to experience it.. is to walk into an emotional trap. (for me at least) It just feels like not falling in love, no matter what the situation would be is not the right thing for me right now. Thing is, whenever I get to know somebody well enough while maintaining a sexual relationship… it just happens over time. I caught up with my feelings and tell myself things like “Loves worth a shot!”. However, at this point and time, like I said… its a bad idea for me. So, how do I prevent my hopeless-self from falling in love without having to sacrifice a sex life and without having one night stands?

 

Well let me tell you..I have the same issue. But when the hurt is too great and you simply have to accept that your heart or mind or whatever makes an emotional connection once you have sex more than once with someone you more than like.. Than you have to make choices.

 

I'd rather be confident, happy within myself and save my desire for a guy that is worth it now..then succumb to the negative effects that either connecting with the wrong people or detached sex bring to the table. When I will need to let off some steam I will go for my rubber friends .

 

The FWB, the occassional 'seems like it might be more than a date'-sex, the one night stand, or not a one night stand, but that is what it turned into--...it all isnt worth it to me anymore. AND I LOVE SEX!.. so its hard, but the negative sides are harder..

 

I have faith that someone out there will swoop me up real soon, because this sexy mama should not go to waste ;-)...and so should you..

 

And if you would resort to a one night stand situation if you feel you are crawling up the wall...thats ok too..but be ready for the backlash..

[Mr Man]

Don't take this the wrong way... but it's cowardly.

 

Everyone is scared of being hurt, we're only human. You have to be some cold, emotionless wreck not to have some kind of fear of being hurt. The difference is brave people allow themselves to be vulnerable because they are strong enough to know that even if they are hurt they will recover. Don't try and put a guard up; besides it being disrespectful to the person you are with - it's cowardly...

[maalox]

Why on earth prevent yourself from falling in love? Love isn't something that is hoarded or given to one person only forever (that's fidelity). I'm in a relationship with the coolest chic in the universe and I know I'm going to get my heart broken. When that happens I will still love her. I made it to fifty and have been in love a few times and still love every one of those exes. I just wish them well and love them from a distance in space and time. I think its when people start adding too many expectations to love that it gets scary, but that is also not love.