Messy Affair

[Doodles04]

I am a 32 year old female who lives with a 63 year old male. I started feeling unhappy over a year ago, and about 6 months ago got involved with a 44 year old divorced male that I met at a friend's social gathering. This guy has helped me start sorting out my financial situation so that I can move out on my own. He has always told me that he considers himself single until I am no longer living with the 63 year old guy. In the meantime, I have developed feelings for him, which I have told him, and he says that he "cares" about me. Last Friday night he met a girl at a bar that he is interested in dating and was ready to call things quits with me. I have asked that he really consider a relationship with me, which he says that he has not thought about. He asked me to give him some space to think. I have not heard from him since he asked this last Saturday. I really think that there maybe a possibility with this guy, if he would only hold on until I can move out. Is it a bad sign that he's not contacted me, or has he withdrawn to think things over? I've been really upset, but have resisted the urge to even send him a text. Any ideas?

[DN]

He may feel wary about being involved with someone who pursues him while living with someone else.

[HeartGoesOn]

Is it a bad sign that he's not contacted me, or has he withdrawn to think things over? I've been really upset, but have resisted the urge to even send him a text. Any ideas?

 

No, I think it's a good sign that he has enough respect for himself to resist getting involved with a woman who is not available, and living with another man.

[UniqueSoul]

i agree with heartgoeson. he was keeping his boundaries, and probably does need some time to think if his morals are worth shifting for you. itll work out if its supposed to!

[Capricorn3]

It's only been a few days. I would assume when he said to give him space to think, it would mean much longer than a few days. I wouldn't worry about him at this point, but rather focus on getting your house in order, so to speak, and only once that is done, then think about this other guy.

[CatsMeeoow]

Honestly there's a lot of pressure on this guy. Rather than meeting and dating you as a clearly single woman he meets you under the issues of you are co-habitating with someone. No one wants to feel to be the home wrecker so to speak. He let you know very clearly where his boundaries were. I think before continuing to pursue this guy you need to follow through and move yourself out and completely on your own. You have to be fair to him as well. Give him the space and let him come to you. I think he feels enough pressure right now.

[metrogirl]

What is the nature of the relationship with the 60 year old guy? Are you just roommates or are you two a couple?

 

I'm thinking he isn't interested in entering a relationship with you while you are with someone else. Smart move on his part.