It's amazing how good is a little flirting!

[AnnaN]

So long story short, I got dumped less than 3 weeks ago. I really loved him and wanted to spend my life with him, for me it was the perfect relationship but he decided in one night that he wants to be alone.

 

Since then, I can't sleep, eat, work, nothing! The only thing I have in my mind is that I want him back and I read all the time forums, articles, books about how to do this. I've never been so pathetic and desperate in my life and I feel ashamed of that...

 

I was on Facebook, and although I never accept people that I don't know, I added the cousin of a friend of mine. And we talked for one hour and a half. It was nice to talk to someone new, even this way, I had never done it before, someone you don't know, someone who didn't know my problems like all my friends know so we keep talking about my ex all the time and I feel miserable.

 

It's been 4.5 years since I last flirted and went on a date with someone, doing that even virtually, made me feel good and remember the days I was single and happy by myself.

 

We also exchanged numbers, we may catch up for a coffee these days. I am not planning on dating anyone soon, and I don't want to have a rebound.

I saw it as my first step to the single life again and I felt good for the first time after 3 weeks. Tomorrow I may be miserable again, but one day I won't.

[Thorshammer]

You little flirt you!

 

Anyways, why you say he decided this on one night? Does he have mental issues? Because, a big decision like a break-up is usually a growing-process. I have broken up with girls that thought it happened random, even though after BU I told them it was something i been feeling for a while now. Quick random breaks ups are usually regretted really quickly, I almost broke up with my ex 2 times during the most heated battles, and i knew i would come back (even though i didnt do it).

[octour]

Sorry to hear about your recent breakup, but you are going thru what I just went thru 3 months ago. I too wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and was going to ask her to marry me. She married someone not even 2 months after she broke up with me. I couldn't do a thing. I couldn't sleep, eat, work etc. I lost 15 pounds. The list goes on and on. But it does get better. I got the strength to go out and talk to a few people as well shortly after our breakup, I wasn't going to let her keep me down. It does feel good and it does make you feel attractive. Even though I may not be interested in dating anyone right now, it still feels good just to smile and say 'hello' to someone you find attractive.

Since then, I have started to exercise which helps a lot. Looking better and feeling healthier always helps regardless of your situation. I think you're doing the right thing and you are right, you are going to have your ups and downs. But you are trying and it does get better. The less time you spend trying to figure out why he did this or that, the more time you can spend on you. Don't feel pathetic, it's normal to feel the way you do after a loss. If you didn't feel this way, THEN I would start to worry. It shows you have a heart and have compassion and have feelings. Nothing wrong with that at all. Take this time to heal. The sooner the better and you will soon be in a much better place and be a much stronger person as well.

[AnnaN]

You little flirt you!

 

Anyways, why you say he decided this on one night? Does he have mental issues? Because, a big decision like a break-up is usually a growing-process. I have broken up with girls that thought it happened random, even though after BU I told them it was something i been feeling for a while now. Quick random breaks ups are usually regretted really quickly, I almost broke up with my ex 2 times during the most heated battles, and i knew i would come back (even though i didnt do it).

 

He said he was thinking about it for a while, like a week, but he didn't say or show anything. On the contrary, he was making plans for our holidays, his 'special' birthday night that we would spend together etc without asking him to. I though he would regret it quickly, but no. I contacted him yesterday, his birthday, I didn't mention anything about bu, he didn't say anything. And I know there's no one else, he is not even going out with friends. I don't think I will ever know. I hope he realizes his mistake soon, I won't be around for ever.