candy123 Posted November 15, 2011 Share Posted November 15, 2011 I've been dating this gentleman for the last 7 years. He had been coming over to my place every weekend and never considered to bring anything (groceries). After 2 years I mentioned this to him and he was offended, saying what are you saying that I've been sponging off of you? I figured ( he has 3 kids living at home) that if he was receiving rent from them, that I shouldn't have had to ask " if he could help me once in a while with groceries". Things never changed even after I've brought this subject up a few times. Last year I lost my job and just recently, I've had to make the decision to move (8 hours) away because financially I'm pretty well broke. We had discussed me moving in with him and the 3 kids, but I figured that I would become everybody's maid. His kids are 22/25/30. None of them work!!!The 3 kids either receive welfare and one is on a disability.How can someone qualify for welfare when they're still living at home and not even trying to get a job? I shouldn't talk because I'm also unemployed, but I do receive support from my ex. I had been with this company and because I brought up something that was bothering me at work ( another employee who got paid the same as me would go into the manager's office pretty well every day for 1 hr to 1 1/2 hours almost every day for the last 1 1/2 years.This had been bothering me for quite sometime and finally had the courage to speak up. My manager chewed me up for 2 1//2 hours over my complaint and I ended up on stress leave because of it. To make matters worse the Union sided with management and I decided that mentally it would be too hard returning for the same company. My boyfriend said that I should have just gone into work and ignore what was going on. His 30 year old son lost his job, because he was calling in sick at least once a week and his dad thinks that he wasn't doing anything wrong. I can't understand how my boyfriend could not support me (mentally while I was on sick leave) but he always supports whatever his kids do. My question is this, I asked him if he would wait for me until the spring ( in case that I don't like living with family and decide to come back. He said that it's not fair for me to move that far away and expect him to just sit at home waiting whether I will come back or not. I've told him that I had to move with family until I get back on my feet financially. I'm hurt that he won't wait for me until spring. Since I made the decision to move away, now he wants to pick up the tab when we go out. Ever since we started dating, I always supplied the food at my house and paid my half when we go out. My family thinks that what he has been doing for the last seven years is totally discusting. He doesn't know how my family feels about him. He has told me in the past, that I tell people too much. What am I suppose to tell my family, that yes he does help me? Should I just move and never look back? If his kids were 7 and 8 years old, I would fully expect him to help them, but at the age their at I resent the fact that he can help them but not me. Am I being selfish? Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.