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Ex's mother possibly interfering with steps to reconciliation? What do I do?


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That's my original story. The last I heard from my ex was that she would let me know about getting together to speak in person about her actions. That was a week ago.


The new dilemma is this: I found out today from a mutual friend that my ex's mother has been, as recently as a few weeks ago, been bashing me to my ex in a major way. My ex has expressed a lot of regret towards the way she treated me after the breakup, and from what the friend said is evidently continuing to feel it, (if you read the story--she acted nuts after dumping me), but her mother is goading her to feel the opposite. Pointing out my bad qualities, bad aspects of our relationship, etc. Twisting things and magnifying all negativity.


There had been many red flags that this could happen during our relationship. My ex's previous boyfriend of years, who admittedly did seem to treat my ex pretty horribly, has been the continual topic of * * * * -talking by her mother for the whole time we were together. As in, whenever he happened to come up the mother would just breathe fire about him. In addition, and more alarmingly, the mother would say horrible things about my ex's dad (to whom she is still married) to anyone and everyone who would listen. My mom was shocked when she first met the ex's mom and she so easily started bashing her dad. They're not happily married, obviously, and there's no way they could be with that kind of behavior. But not being happily married is not an excuse to do that. It's just classless.


The ex's mom hates men. Plain and simple. She doesn't like them and doesn't trust them. And the worst part about it is, she's in my ex's ear constantly now. I feel like she just wants her to herself. The mother and I had, at least I thought, a good relationship when the ex and I were together. Now I hear about all of this.


Has anyone ever heard of this before? What the hell do I do to deal with it? My ex is almost 30. I'm all for women being close to their mothers, but this seems really odd.


Do you think this is hurting the reconciliation chances? Possibly helping (people sometimes say that the mother hating you makes you more attractive)? How do I deal with it?

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