Sort of dumped her back, how do you think she feels?

[mickyfinn]

My gf left me about 3 months ago and started dating a boy from her university a few weeks after. I was devistated and when i asked her if the thought of me being with another girl bothered her she said no.

 

before i went NC she was saying how important i am to her and she hopes we can be together in the future. anyway i can't be bothered with that kind of rubbish so i went NC and truly don't want to get back with her - she had her chance. she was always more into me than i was her and i just feel like there's someone better for me out there. but the thought of her being with someone else is still horrible. she has been trying to call me and i've just been blanking her calls for my healing. i dont want to play any games so i sent her a letter about a week ago saying that i dont want to be friends and i'll never take her back. i made it unmistakably clear that she should never contact me again. it wasn't an angry letter, i wished her all the best, i just made it clear that i'm gone forever now, there's no turning back time and to never reach out ever in her life again.

 

she's obviously respected my wishes because she hasn't called or anything, which i am happy about.

 

but i'm feeling slightly guilty about cutting her out completely. i know it's the right thing to do and ive deleted all of her details so theres no way to contact her again anyway.

 

im just curious to know how she must have felt being told that im gone forever, there's no chance of a future and never to contact me again? anyone have any experience with this?

[camus154]

You're worried about the wrong thing. Forget how she felt. You won't ever know and it doesn't matter. You're feeling guilty not because you've done anything wrong, but because you're uncomfortable with the idea of severing contact with her completely.

 

It's normal. Don't worry about it, don't over think it, and keep movin' on.

[mickyfinn]

i know i won't definitely ever know how she felt, im just asking for speculation. thanks for your reply anyway

[Mephisto13]

Speculation nearly made me go nuts. I spent weeks thinking, overthinking, rethinking the overthinking...

 

Until I've had enough.

 

What helped me was looking at the worse case scenario, and holding on to that scenario whenever I thought about the situation. I discovered a few years later that what I speculated wasn't true. But it helped me heal. It was what I needed at the time.

 

Don't speculate...tis the path to destruction. The guilt will recede. Just imagine her having a grand ol' time with her new beau.

[mickyfinn]

thanks for your input. it really isn't something which is going to bother me for a long long time, im just interested right now.

[LDRohnos]

I would just speculate that she's moved on and you should do the same.