Trust issues

[LolaMay4559]

I started seeing this guy in September. He told me from the start that he was going to a football game this past weekend with a friend. I didn't think much of it at first, but then a couple of weeks ago he let the cat out of the bag that it was a single lady friend of his. I was suspicious, and by asking a few more questions I found out that she is a single mother who calls him weekly (at least) to discuss her life's issues with him. She supposedly had invited him to the game a couple of weeks before he met me. She also was paying his way. For some reason, something just didn't feel right to me. He only met her a couple of weeks before he met me, and while he insists that they just met randomly camping, I think he met her on a dating site.

 

The night before their trip he was supposed to come see me and bring me some money I lent him. He told me that he was still highly contagious with a sinus infection or strep throat that he'd gone to the doctor for earlier in the week. Funny thing is, when I talked to him on the phone (when he screamed at me later that night), he didn't sound sick at all. I asked if he was too contagious to ride down to the game the next day and he said yes, but he was going anyway. He told me he wouldn't be hugging on people like he would me, so it wouldn't matter. I asked if he could meet me the next morning before they left, and he again said no.

 

I tried to get past it, I really did, but I honestly don't feel comfortable with a guy I'm supposedly exclusively seeing going on a trip alone with a single female, and staying the night. Here's another thing. He told me that they were driving back after the game (hour and a half away), but then the night before they were to go he admitted that the original plan had been to drive back, but now they were probably going to stay the night. He had not even updated me on the plans until I specifically asked. I asked him if she was aware that he was seeing someone, and he swore up and down that he'd told her. I asked if I could ride down with them since I have friends in the area, and he got very angry that I would try to "push" myself to hang out with him and his friend. I asked him why a single woman would invite a guy with a girlfriend, and not take her son who loves sports. He screamed at me on the phone that I was making stuff up in my head, and that his lady friend is an upstanding citizen who just is such a great friend she thought he'd enjoy the game. I said ok, let's drop it.

 

The day of the event I don't hear a word from him, of course, and he doesn't respond to the one text I send. The morning after I log into facebook and his friend has uploaded pictures from their trip. Included in the pics are his contagious self hugging a girl. He really looks quite healthy also. So my question is, was I right to have concerns, or was he right and I have trust issues?

[mhowe]

This is only the end of October. Leave him. And don't lend bf's $$.

[wai]

He's obviously making you doubt yourself. I also think you should leave him.

[LolaMay4559]

Thanks for the responses. Yeah I think it's over. At the very least, I want to date a guy who is considerate of my feelings, and at least takes them into account when making decisions.

[Mesemene]

I wonder how he'd have viewed the situation if it was reversed and YOU were going overnight to a concert or something with a single guy? Yeah, I'd be booting his inconsiderate butt out the door - it doesn't bode well that in the initial "put your best foot forward" stage of a relationship, he's going on an overnight with a single female and screaming at you because you're a bit unhappy about it.

[raton44]

wow. DEFINITELY get rid of this dude.