starcrossed Posted October 24, 2011 Share Posted October 24, 2011 I need advice from someone "healthier" than me. To make a long story short, I have been in four relationships previously that have ended in disaster: first it was a compulsive liar, then bestiality, then an abusive drug addict, and then a cheater. So I REALLY know how to pick 'em! I need some advice from more clear-thinking individuals. After a move and some time to myself, I have started dating again. There is a man that I am interested in, but as of a couple weeks ago, there have been some "red flags", if they are "red flags" at all or just my baggage. *** I met this guy on a dating site!!! This guy is everything that my past exes have NOT been. He is hardworking, dedicated, ambitious, religious, and seems amazing. We have a LOT of chemistry and he keeps me laughing. He wants a relationship with me, but I do not want to enter into another really bad situation and have my heart broken again. We see each other about once a week which is fine...but He doesn't answer his texts. I might text him once a day or so, and sometimes he wont even reply. I might say, "Good morning, hope you are doing well!" and not get a reply until 12hours-a day or two later. Usually this wouldn't bother me, but I can't help but wonder why when he always has his phone on him and spends a lot of time on the computer. Then, I added him to my Facebook. He told me he never uses Facebook, even though when I found it there was recent activity on it. I approached him a few days ago and said teasingly, "You need to accept my friend request!" He told me that he never uses Facebook (even though he has 200+ friends) and left it at that. DISCLAIMER: My last ex cheated on me through our entire relationship, and apparently his girlfriend was on his Facebook. I would never know, because he never accepted my request and then later hid his profile from view. When he told me that he doesn't use his Facebook, my heart sank a little. I had added him a few days previous and knew better. Then, I did something I should not have done. I "snooped" on his public friends list (again, I know my baggage isn't good but it is what it is)... There is a girl on his friends list with HIM in the profile, her hand placed on his chest, and they are both dressed in formals. It is her profile pick and I recognized him immediately while I was looking at his friends list. She is a few years younger than me and lives in the area... She also goes to his church. I find it odd that he is in HER profile picture??? I feel bad for snooping on his friends list... but I've been through this before. My heart started racing, because I'm starting to really like the guy! But I am not sure how to handle this... Am I over-reacting? Should I be worried about any of this? The lack of communication (wishing him good morning or good night and never getting a response, asking him out but he is always doing homework)? The guy is taking two classes at a nearby college (same as her), but he is ALWAYS doing homework. And he spends a LOT of time online, especially on sites like LinkedIN What he tells me is one thing... but talk is cheap! Am I being crazy??? Is it too much to ask that he at least drops me a line, wishes me goodnight?? I don't know what is normal anymore!!! Link to comment
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