don't know how to ask him to leave and a divorce

[mecampbell]

I have been married now for 7 years, the 1st 5 years where great, but now all we seem to do is argue and fall out over the silly thing. He doesn't work, he drink at least 4 ltr of cider a day sometimes more. I work full time just to tr and keep our heads above water. When i get home from work he is either asleep or has the music on full blast.. I just cant live like this any more. I am making my self unhappy and i also have my kids to think about too.

My husband thinks that everything is ok but i have tried to tell him different but he wont listen.

How can i tell him to leave and that i want a divorce. Please Help

[lavenderdove]

There is no easy way to do that... Do you own the house or rent? If you own it together or his name is on the lease, you can't make him leave unless he agrees to it without getting a lawyer involved, so if you know for sure you want to divorce, your best bet is to talk to a lawyer first to ask them how you go about getting him out of the house if he is drunk all day and doesn't work. If all he does is drink all day and he blasts music etc that is disruptive to you and your children, a judge may very well order him out of the house.

 

If arrange somewhere for him to go (does he have family or friends to take him in?), then you might talk him into leaving. But if he has no means of support and is a serious alcoholic and disregards his adult responsibilities he may refuse to leave, so try to find a lawyer. if you can't afford one, look for social services that provide free legal aid. He is being a terrible role model for your chlidren and i'm sure disrupting your lives, so please don't just put up with his drinking and irresponsibility. Chldren need a stable environment, and he is not doing anything now but causing trouble and mooching off you.

 

Women's shelters also have experience dealingiwith this kind of thing of getting him out of the house safely (or you moved elsewhere) so you might try calling one of them and asking for advice on how to get him out of the hosue.

[alcide]

you shouldn't leave him just yet. maybe try leaving the house to give him a wake up call for a few months and see how t goes, when you come back and he wants to take you for granted then you simple break it down for him. maybe walking away completely might just kill him slowly , 6btls of soda this person needs help... marriage is for better or for worst so work with him see how you can pull him back on his foot again.